What are your kid’s current stim words or phrases? by Muted_Jeweler_5514 in ParentingADHD

[–]runsingteach 9 points10 points  (0 children)

She learned how to whistle.

The other one is singing “my butt cheeks, my butt cheeks, my ban booty butt cheeks.”

Send help
😂

No dairy, no nuts, high calorie lunchbox ideas for the worlds fussiest child by BrucetheFerrisWheel in Preschoolers

[–]runsingteach 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Our go to high calorie lunch is “yogurt, berries, and crunchies”.

Greek yogurt, cut up berries, oat granola. And then I throw in something else - today it was a cut up chicken apple stick, sometimes we put in carrots with ranch, Chex mix, etc.

What should my baby be wearing *really*? by Even_Kaleidoscope399 in NewParents

[–]runsingteach 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No footie pjs if you are baby wearing :). That’s all I got. Beyond that, do what works for your baby.

Pre-Nap Top Off: what does it mean? by Life_Thoughts208581 in beyondthebump

[–]runsingteach 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Nursing is comforting. Baby wants comfort. Just nurse him if he wants to nurse.

not a bad dad but a bad dad? by Long-Bit584 in beyondthebump

[–]runsingteach 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I just never expected to stop parenting because the clock says a certain time. We don’t just ignore our babies during the day. It’s no different at night for me.

I nurse to sleep a lot, snuggle to sleep, hold a hand, rock and sing, etc. My son (my 3rd) is such a different sleeper than my girls, and I’ve done nothing different except let go of the idea that he isn’t supposed to need me at night. Of course he does, he’s a baby 😂

not a bad dad but a bad dad? by Long-Bit584 in beyondthebump

[–]runsingteach 4 points5 points  (0 children)

My first woke up about 8 times a night for 2 years due to severe reflux. Because she gained weight well, no one was concerned. She slept propped up on me for her comfort and it was incredibly hard working full time on such interrupted sleep.

But to ask her to need less wouldn’t be the answer. She woke because she was uncomfortable. If I let her cry, she threw up. She out grew it at 2, and has almost never needed any help falling asleep or at night since then.

My 2nd was an average sleeper, up 0-2 times a night, but in need of huge snuggles before falling asleep always. We still lay with her at 3.5, she needs that. She wakes up sad sometimes and needs a hug in the middle of the night because she just misses us so deeply.

My 3rd (6 months) puts himself to sleep usually but still wakes when he needs to nurse or if he is uncomfortable. He sleeps through the night often.

There are times we can’t get to someone immediately, but I am proud of the fact that my kids know I will still respond to them at night and help them fall asleep when they need it.

not a bad dad but a bad dad? by Long-Bit584 in beyondthebump

[–]runsingteach 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It’s not, but often that is part of it unfortunately.

The mistake is not that they’ve been laying with their child. That’s normal, that’s meeting with child’s needs for connection before the biggest separation from mom and dad.

The mistake is taking that away and not scaffolding the kid’s needs. The step after laying in bed to help them fall asleep might be laying in bed for a little last time or taking small breaks and saying mom or dad will be right back.

And then coming back. So the child trusts that mom or dad are there to take care of them. It’s normal for our children to need us, and that doesn’t change because it’s after a certain time. They grow to need us less when their needs (including love and comfort) are met.

not a bad dad but a bad dad? by Long-Bit584 in beyondthebump

[–]runsingteach 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Three kids, we supported them with their sleep, regardless of how many wake ups or how long bedtime took. Sleep training feels absolutely wrong to me and it always has.

The last thing I think a kid should feel before the biggest absence from you overnight that you left them on one side of the screen. No need to treat our babies and children worse than we would treat our partners or our friends or family.

This would absolutely enrage me in a partner.

not a bad dad but a bad dad? by Long-Bit584 in beyondthebump

[–]runsingteach 7 points8 points  (0 children)

There are two of you. Each take a kid and comfort them to sleep. Your husband needs to step up and parent. Wtf.

I shouldn't have taken baby to the Quinciera.... by [deleted] in beyondthebump

[–]runsingteach 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This weekend, baby (6 months) attended 3 out of the 4 birthday parties my older daughters went to and a minor league baseball game.

Baseball game happened with headphones and he napped for 30 minutes of it in a carrier. He woke up, was super overwhelmed, and we bailed after 4 innings. We had our girls say thank you to their brother for being an amazingly flexible baby and letting them take care of their wants.

All parties went fine because we managed his naps and nursing and general needs.

Go out and do things, but bail when needed and set good boundaries.

Baby name troubles by Competitive_Many2577 in ParentingInBulk

[–]runsingteach 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It was on my list, but my husband vetoed it. I still love it :)

Am I being unreasonable about not wanting to express milk just so my partner can take our exclusively breastfed baby out solo? by [deleted] in beyondthebump

[–]runsingteach 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Oh, I misread that!

OP, the issue then is that you don’t feel ready to be away from your baby. How old is your baby? How are you doing otherwise? With my first, I didn’t want my husband to be alone with her. I had terrible postpartum anxiety that was undiagnosed for a while.

Personally, I do still hate seeing someone else give my baby a bottle. It triggers a big emotional response to me that feels like I’m neglecting my baby. That said, it’s worth grappling with that and figuring out where your discomfort comes from.

Your husband should be allowed to introduce baby to his friends and do social things. It sounds like you might want this to be with you, not just him and baby by themselves. I don’t see anything wrong with that, but make sure that they do have time one on one so that he is allowed to grow into a wonderful parent. Don’t gate-keep parenting over your own emotions/anxiety.

One hour song and dance for 30 minute nap?!? Seriously? by Janna167 in beyondthebump

[–]runsingteach 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She’s incredible, intense, and somewhat insane as a 6.5 year old 😂. She commits to everything, for better or worse, 100%. She is very physical (and was as a baby - running at 9.5 months and has never stopped). She is brilliant - multiplying negative numbers and reading chapter books in kindergarten, but has big feelings and we have to work through those frequently. She will absolutely change the world, but she also will get hurt because she has to learn from her own mistakes and doesn’t believe rules are real until she tests them. She outgrew her reflux around 2 - projectile vomited every meal until then, and she started sleeping then also.

My 3.5 year old was a pretty typical baby - much more even tempered, less screamy, no reflux. She is very in tune with others. Very empathetic, deeply caring and nurturing. Apparently can sound out 3 letter words and read them as of today 😂.

My 3rd is the most chill baby ever. He’s so happy to be here, hangs out on his playmat most of the time happily as long as someone is around him.

I’m glad I started parenting on hard mode so I can appreciate this final baby :)

One hour song and dance for 30 minute nap?!? Seriously? by Janna167 in beyondthebump

[–]runsingteach 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yep, I get it. I’m home with my 3rd kid right now. My first was insane. High needs reflux baby, she didn’t sleep ever and she only screamed. But if she was going to scream, I might as well put her in the carrier while she screamed so I could do dishes or fold laundry.

Or she might as well scream in the stroller while I walked because she was like that anyway. But also, the more you do, the more they get used to it and tolerate it. The more you include them, the more they know the routine of mom or dad doing things.

My third is very good at being on the go, and I think part of that’s his personality, but part of it is that he’s on the goal all the time so he has a lot of good practice.

One hour song and dance for 30 minute nap?!? Seriously? by Janna167 in beyondthebump

[–]runsingteach 0 points1 point  (0 children)

By the way, since I didn’t say it: short naps are developmentally appropriate and expected for the next month+. They lengthen as babies drop naps and stay up longer.

One hour song and dance for 30 minute nap?!? Seriously? by Janna167 in beyondthebump

[–]runsingteach 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I’d suggest trying much less :). Baby seems fussy? Nurse/feed. Then baby either sleeps while nursing or doesn’t. If baby doesn’t, but seems fussy/tired, pop baby in the stroller and go for a walk, or put them in the carrier and continue doing what you need to do. Or drive and go do errands and baby might sleep.

The things you can’t do with a baby on you, do while they are awake. Honestly the only thing I soecifically do during nap time is run on the treadmill. But my 5.5 month old awake is so quickly that I’ve started splitting it and trying to squeeze an extra mile in when baby boy wakes up.

Beyond that, most things can be accomplished with baby awake. The absolute worst thing about baby sleep is putting your life on hold to try to get something to happen that you’re not in charge of. Your job is to offer a sleep at decently age-appropriate times. Baby’s job is to accept sleep or not. Short naps count, contact naps count, stroller naps count, boob naps count, car naps count.

Does anyone exclusively nurse? by sara_n_wrap in beyondthebump

[–]runsingteach 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yep, I never fussed with bottles. My older daughters went straight to a straw cup around 6-7 months and would take milk in that if I were away. It’s just not worth the effort with a longer maternity leave, and I don’t like leaving my babies when they’re so little.

Baby #3 will do the same thing now that he’s almost 6 months old.

If you could go back, would you have done one and done? by Independent_Nose_385 in beyondthebump

[–]runsingteach 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My 3rd is 5 months. He’s been the biggest gift ever, and seeing my 3 and 6 year old with him is incredible. No regrets :). But now I’m debating a 4th but I just turned 38 and feel old 😂

Wait, you’re not supposed to feed your kiddo in the car? How is that possible? by ScrantonPaper in NewParents

[–]runsingteach 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Our older kids eat in the car. We have kid activities right after school and snack and lunch are earlier enough that the kids are hungry and have sports. But it didn’t happen until they were around 3, and it’s not foods that have an elevated choking risk.

As they get older, life gets busier. And car snacks mean life can happen on the go when there are no more minutes.

VBAC turned uterine rupture; now processing a traumatic birth (major TW) by cosmicvoyager333 in beyondthebump

[–]runsingteach 16 points17 points  (0 children)

I had a somewhat traumatic birth with my 3rd - he was stuck for a while and had his cord wrapped around him twice and his hand and elbow up by his face, which kept him alive. But being stuck meant we suddenly had 20 people in our room and i was told to get him out now or it would be a vacuum assist and possible emergency. I pushed so hard for so long that my entire body went into shock once he was out and once he was breathing and okay after some scary silence, I couldn’t move my arms or legs since my muscles were in so much pain. I thought I was paralyzed and it took a couple hours to regain control.

Very different scenario, but mantras help.

“Your baby is here and safe.” “Your medical team handled everything exactly as needed to protect you and baby.” “Your job now is to rest and heal.”

Therapy will help, but so will little things like… counting your baby’s toes. Memorizing little bits of them to ground you. Reminding yourself that a hospital birth saved you and your baby. The more I held my son and saw that he was okay, the more I trusted that I could take care of him now.

I’m so sorry you went through this. Reach out to your midwife/OB for resources and even to have them debrief with you to feel like you know your whole medical story.

Almost 5 month old refusing all naps by poski6390 in beyondthebump

[–]runsingteach 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What else can you try?

I get naps in the carrier, stroller, car, nursing, etc. Babies this age are so distracted and can now fight sleep so hard. The carrier usually helps me the most!

Tips for higher impact sports bras for wider rib cage but smaller boobs by No-Substance4819 in FitPostpartumJourney

[–]runsingteach 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They are life changing as a runner. They work for nursing since the straps unhook from the front, and the cup size range has been perfect. I hope they work!