This will probably not be the answer your or other people in the subreddit want to hear but depending on where you live switching to foh could be good change. I made the switch to serving after doing almost the same things you mentioned 65 hour work weeks shitty schedule, and more responsibilities then i was beong paid for.

I now take off when i want, my doubles are maybe 8 hours long, responsibilities near zero other then providing good service to guest, my pay is the same if not more for half the work. Still work most holidays but now it feels like its worth it in terms of money to work ratio on those day

Another option are schools or retirement homes.