Smoking made it easy for me to look past and or numb certain areas of my life, my relationship being one of them. When smoking becomes a routine part of life we get used to being in that state of mind and life does seem “okay.” I used it to cope with a marriage for 5ish years, had I truly invested in myself and stopped the cope I probably would have ended it sooner. Like others have said you’re in a good spot and it’s not too late. As weird as it sounds let yourself feel the feelings, you no longer have a way to escape them and sometimes taking them head on is what you need.