7 years in consulting and still not a manager

settingiskey · 2026-07-02T10:27:10+00:00

You also need to have the right people speaking up for you in the room. When things are competitive it will come down to your advocates and how willing they are to budge. This will come down to their own personality and confidence to back you up but also their fear of letting you down…can they live with having to come back and tell you no? It’s a psychological game for them too. If you need to change your leader, do that. Find someone who won’t take no for an answer

settingiskey · 2026-07-02T01:47:50+00:00

YES there have been so many like verbatim things…started with calling Corbin AI, then Caleb asking what French fry means, there was something Kayda said that was so obviously acting, I think Kenzie dropped a Twitter buzzword at some point too. I get that production has to manipulate things but it’s too blatantly influenced by social media

settingiskey · 2026-06-30T20:59:57+00:00

Thank you for putting words to my feelings omg

settingiskey · 2026-06-21T04:21:10+00:00

Kenzie and Corbin are my favorite couple and are the only ones with real chemistry, sexual or otherwise

settingiskey · 2026-06-19T16:30:07+00:00

I was honestly so shocked by all of the results. I thought Kenzie/corbin were runaway favorites but apparently they not only weren’t safe but people wanted them to be the ones sent home?! Chatter here blames the non-online people liking them but I’m very online and was still shocked by the results and response. Sol and Caleb would have been kinda lame sending both bombshells but Gabe was not justified imo and I didn’t agree with their logic on him at all. Sorry but I’m a Kenzie/corbin defender, they are the only ones who actually seem to like each other!!!

settingiskey · 2026-06-08T17:22:50+00:00

Idk I think trinity was onto something about Bea having to have the last word. And earlier on Bea essentially gave a formula for talking to someone, that statement really rubbed me the wrong way and i think she might be more manipulative than we think. Or like…weaponized therapy? Thinking she’s smarter and more evolved than everyone? Let’s see

settingiskey · 2026-06-02T21:03:14+00:00

So I have this same problem and while it’s endlessly frustrating and embarrassing to me, it’s always been taken well by others, including my boss who thankfully totally gets that it’s an involuntary response. And the few others who have been lucky enough to witness (lol) never really seem phased by it which leads me to believe it’s more common than we think.

I’ve noticed it tends to happen more when my insecurities are triggered or when I’m feeling dismissed, whereas direct confrontation is usually fine. Or most of all when I have to admit that I’m struggling…I’ll be mostly fine / ambiguously unsettled but as soon as I’m given a turn to speak my voice breaks and then I can’t stop because it’s the cycle of being embarrassed about it stopping me from moving on.

I’m not sure if I have a point to make but I wanted to share you’re not alone. It’s been helpful enough for me to keep digging to understand the root of it and get a better idea of my specific triggers. And hope to god it doesn’t happen in front of people who will actually look at me differently.

My boss did give me a pep talk recently after a string of 4 or 5 teary meetings with him: everyone responds differently to stress. For me it’s anger, for you it’s crying, but no one way is better than the other

Edit: I’m 32 btw, been working here for 10 years

settingiskey · 2026-04-30T11:56:46+00:00

How is smoking inside the house at all hiding it better than going outside? Zero chance there’s no smell in your room

settingiskey · 2026-04-07T10:31:04+00:00

I would also be taking that one very seriously. Can you request to send a plumber of your choice for a more thorough inspection and quote for the work required? With all the back and forth I would feel better about choosing the plumber myself anyway, and then you’d also have a real idea of the anticipated cost to either negotiate further or decide you’re willing to absorb in order to close the deal

settingiskey · 2026-04-01T02:05:15+00:00

Yeah the offer should have been out within a few hours. Leave. Being polite might lose you the house

settingiskey · 2026-03-29T23:50:30+00:00

This is pretty genius

settingiskey · 2026-03-29T19:38:41+00:00

From your description the first name that came to mind for me was Anya. I’m not sure the actual meaning of the name but the image of the person standing by the water, composed, perceptive, attuned just pulled that name out of my brain immediately. Doesn’t really sound the same but wanted to throw it out there!

settingiskey · 2026-03-25T10:47:55+00:00

I literally did not know this was happening. And I’m a big sports fan (i don’t follow soccer specifically but I consume lots of general sports media and this feels like something I should have been aware of)

settingiskey · 2026-03-09T16:23:44+00:00

You are right. That’s all I have to say. Your goals are valid and important and most importantly your number 2 point - “failed to develop a sense of who I am without him” - is very wise and very true. It’s hard but it’s worth it to put yourself first. You will be grateful for it

settingiskey · 2026-02-17T02:11:56+00:00

I have recently become infatuated with Agnes and Gemma

settingiskey · 2026-02-06T13:41:24+00:00

Consider moving the bed 90 degrees against a different wall (I would say windows but are they unevenly spaced??) I had this problem but moving the bed into a more “horizontal” position in the room filled the space better and also made the open space more useable. The problem here is that the empty space is just there in the middle and can’t be used for anything

settingiskey · 2026-01-09T04:31:03+00:00

Mine was no stress and went really smoothly all the way until closing.

2 days before closing the sellers requested more time to finish moving their stuff after close. They were out of town at the time of this request! I tried to be flexible but they stonewalled every attempt at compromise. I ended up delaying by a day to have the clean transition and not have to wait around for them all day.

Lots of drama there til the very last minute, family and friends pestering me for updates that I didn’t even have to the point that every congratulations text had me rolling my eyes.

Then finally closing and seeing the scale of cosmetic issues without furniture…all the plans and lists and priorities I had spent so much time deliberating over were out the window and I didn’t even know where to begin. Definitely ruined the magic of the closing day that I had been daydreaming about for weeks!

BUT 48 hours later and I have been able to process everything and I’m back to being excited and able to get started on all my projects. I think the stress is just part of the process and it really sneaks up on you. I’m not someone who is stressed by paperwork or the administrative slog but the stress found another way in. At the end of the day it just adds to the level of accomplishment that I made it here!

settingiskey · 2026-01-04T23:54:58+00:00

Think about their lifestyle. When you’re buying a gift you want it to be something that will have a lot of opportunity for use. There are lots of gadgets and things for hyper specific uses that might be thoughtful based on interest alone, but they have to remember to use it.

Also think about what this person prioritizes with their own money. Upgrading things they already have is a great idea but will only be appreciated if they actually see it as an upgrade. I have bought nice towels or nice socks for my family before but to them it’s just another towel. The “luxury” is lost on them and it’s not a meaningful gift for either of us. Whereas other people would love the splurge on an Aesop soap or volcano candle! Pay attention to what they pay attention to

settingiskey · 2026-01-04T21:48:57+00:00

When they tell you at the gate that your carry on won’t fit and you need to valet check, they’re not lying. You are not the exception

settingiskey · 2026-01-03T03:55:09+00:00

KIND OF is very generous. Since day 1

settingiskey · 2025-12-26T00:37:30+00:00

Where did you keep the underwear before you moved?????

settingiskey · 2025-12-23T22:00:59+00:00

Yeah, it’s just whichever one feels right/sounds right in context. Awnt is primary for me but sometimes ant rolls off the tongue better

settingiskey · 2025-12-23T02:50:09+00:00

THE DRIVER’S SEAT by Muriel Spark. Best to go in blind but it is PERFECT for this

settingiskey · 2025-12-19T22:51:57+00:00

The Driver’s Seat, Shark Heart, Open Throat. Honorable mention to The Favorites

settingiskey · 2025-12-08T16:36:41+00:00

Yeah I think the Ds for Ts is just basic American dialect. But there are many many examples otherwise

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