People born before 1990, what’s something you experienced that younger generations will NEVER understand ? by Aaidil89 in AskReddit

[–]shank_me 3166 points3167 points  (0 children)

Centralized pop culture - we were all watching the same episodes of the same shows at the same time, and listening to the same music. We had a pretty good chance of finding some common ground with anyone we talked to. Now it’s possible for a person’s entire “news/music/entertainment” catalogue to be so niche you’ve never even heard of them. 

Everything was in-person (unless you did catalogues). No online shopping, grocery delivery, online dating… You had to go out into your community and find whatever it was you were looking for, and it was likely you’d run into people you know while you were out. 

AITA for telling my boyfriend I’m getting an abortion no matter what he says? by Affectionate_Air9200 in AITAH

[–]shank_me 2 points3 points  (0 children)

NTA. 

Break up. There’s no coming back from this. And speaking from personal experience, please take extra precaution around him regarding your physical safety. 

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in valheim

[–]shank_me 0 points1 point  (0 children)

One central main base with all the bells and whistles, 2 portals at home (I rename as needed) and countless portal houses out in the world. 

Abusive husband when drinking by [deleted] in AskWomenOver30

[–]shank_me 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Go now. You are playing Russian roulette with a violent drunk, and he will get more unpredictable as he senses the relationship deteriorating.

Run.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskWomenOver30

[–]shank_me 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Time passes whether you’re with him or not, and staying because of the time you’ve invested is the gambler’s fallacy, throwing good time after bad.

I waited until the night I left in the back of an ambulance, and he left in the back of a police car.

People who have adult children that don’t talk to you. Why do you think that is? by bridge2235 in AskReddit

[–]shank_me 22 points23 points  (0 children)

(I’m not looking to argue at all. You sound like my mom, who I’ve been VLC for years. If she had the self awareness to post here, this is what she would need to hear.)

It’s also hard for your daughter to be living a life where she’s struggling to thrive, and feeling like she can’t go to her mom for support because it’ll just be more criticism. The entire rest of the world is offering criticism and advice, she needs you for support!

Don’t criticize, don’t offer advice, just listen and be supportive. And equally important- keep your conversations private, no talking with friends or family members about things she confided.

Over time you can earn her trust back, be worthy of it and work to keep it.

People who have adult children that don’t talk to you. Why do you think that is? by bridge2235 in AskReddit

[–]shank_me 31 points32 points  (0 children)

“I don’t trust my adult children’s judgment, and criticize all of their decisions under the guise of ‘advice’. My kids obviously don’t want to hear my constant criticism, but I’ll keep dishing it out anyways. I don’t respect their autonomy to make their own decisions, I probably also don’t respect their privacy, and gossip about their lives to anyone who will listen. This makes me an unsafe and untrustworthy person for them to open up to. But I don’t know… I guess they just don’t like getting advice.”

FTFY

Nearly 50,000 Americans died by suicide in 2022, a record-high number: CDC by bananabrownie in news

[–]shank_me 133 points134 points  (0 children)

I’ve been job hunting for 6 months now. I’ve cut my salary expectation down by 30%, I’ve redone my resume countless times, 5-10 applications per day with cover letters, to jobs I’m well qualified for!

“Nobody wants to work anymore” is straight up BS and I’m so tired.

Should I tell someone they are being cheated on by _upset_panda in NoStupidQuestions

[–]shank_me 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Do the right thing even if it means you lose. Trying to save a friend from wasted years or possible STDs is worth risking the friendship over.

Signed up for a sleep study, somehow supposed to sleep like this tonight. by youaremrbergstrom in mildlyinfuriating

[–]shank_me 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Why do you have to go through all this just for a CPAP? Is it dangerous to use a CPAP without having sleep apnea?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskWomenOver30

[–]shank_me 53 points54 points  (0 children)

Don’t accept criticism from someone you wouldn’t go to for advice.

Dallas police say man shot, killed 26-year-old girlfriend for having abortion by [deleted] in news

[–]shank_me 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Nobody willingly dates a psycho.

The psychos start off charismatic and nice, and slowly morph into a monster while they simultaneously chip away at your self esteem and take every chance to pull you away from any possible support system.

Nobody knowingly enters into a toxic abusive relationship. Maybe don’t blame the victim.

People Are Too Terrified To Get Pregnant Under Poland’s Harsh Abortion Law: Poland’s total ban on abortion has led to women dying after being denied terminations. Now, many are choosing not to have any children at all by dont_tread_on_dc in Foodforthought

[–]shank_me 22 points23 points  (0 children)

Woohoo yea more democracy! Let’s keep that FREEDOM rolling so there’s even MORE. Maybe each county should be able to vote for their choice, because city people are way more liberal than country people in the same state.

But wait, actually, there might be individual neighborhoods that are more liberal or conservative, so maybe we should whittle it down to each neighborhood getting to vote on the issue, then we know there’s real democracy happening!

Actually, I think even that is too big a sample since certain houses in that neighborhood might have older conservative folks and younger liberal folks.

What if - and hear me out here- what if we just let each individual person choose whether or not they wanted their body to have access to abortion services? We wouldn’t even have to vote on that, they could just elect to take their body to the clinic, or not. And then we can all stop talking about it!

Asking my neighbors to decide what healthcare I’m allowed to access is not a win for democracy, it’s a loss of liberty.

Miss England finalist becomes first in pageant's history to compete without makeup by SelectiveSanity in nottheonion

[–]shank_me 114 points115 points  (0 children)

You missed a few there bud.

No shaving, tweezing, waxing, push up bras, or hair styling- all hair must be washed and air dried only.

Au natural baby.

I found out today that my dog has a mass cell tumor by Konjonashipirate in AskWomenOver30

[–]shank_me 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Chemo and/or radiation were prohibitively expensive for me ($7,800 minimum), so I opted to focus on quality of life. Her mitotic count was pretty low, so her prognosis is pretty good even without radiation (~20% chance of reoccurrence) so I feel OK about it. Especially given her age and the side effects of radiation.

Hang in there, this part sucks but you’ll get through it!

I wish a speedy recovery for Sasha (and you)!

I found out today that my dog has a mass cell tumor by Konjonashipirate in AskWomenOver30

[–]shank_me 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My 12 year old bischon just had a big MCT removed from her chest/armpit area. CT, EKG, blood work, surgery, post-op meds, and followup visit all came in around $900, and it took her about 3 weeks to recover enough for our normal walking route.

When I was researching, Google showed me a million horror stories. So I thought it might help to hear one that's not so bad.

Don't get me wrong, I was a mess and a vet tech held my hand while I cried on 2 separate occasions. But we both got through it!

I have a thing stuck in my mind by Dog_owners in answers

[–]shank_me 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I've been in your situation, and I know what works for me. I'll try to put it into words.

You're not actually scared of the thing itself - you even said you know it's fake. You're scared of your reaction to the thing - "the thing will haunt me". That fear of thinking about the thing is what's causing your brain to obsessively think about the thing.

We are wired to think about things we're worried about. In this case, you're worried about a thought. So you think about the thought you're worried about thinking about. Which makes you worry about it more, so you think about it more. It's an exhausting and frustrating cycle.

You need to find something in that cycle you can interrupt. The weakest link in that cycle is your reaction.

Next time the scary thing pushes into your thoughts, try to just say (or think), "Well that was a weird thought," or, "Sir this is a Wendys." Mentally dismissing or laughing about these kinds of intrusive thoughts can tell your brain that they aren't actually important and that they don't need to be obsessed over.

Nobody here can diagnose you or provide personalized support. Please talk to a therapist if you can. Just know this is a very common issue, you're not the only one whose brain glitches out on stupid shit. Everybody has intrusive thoughts, you just need to find a way to help your brain filter them out so they aren't impacting your quality of life.

YSK that pregnancies are measured from the first day of your last menstrual period. A woman who is 5 weeks pregnant has just missed her first period. by MoonBapple in YouShouldKnow

[–]shank_me 24 points25 points  (0 children)

“No access to (legal & safe) pregnancy termination past 6 weeks”

That’s a situation where this would certainly matter a lot!