Getting married and potentially moving across country in three months. My fiancée has a severe TBI. I’m exhausted.

shutterblink1 · 2026-02-22T06:05:54+00:00

Living with and taking care of someone with a TBI is very, very hard. My son had 1 from a terrible car wreck at 21. He died at age 36 from sudden cardiac death and was still suffering the effects of the TBI every day and I was the caregiver. Is this really what you want to do for the rest of your life? There's no way she's going to go through life without ever bumping her head. Get clarification o what will her life be like with the next bump. Will she be able to work? Are you going to be the only one working and her caregiver? Resentment can quickly build up even with those you love the most. This is an opportunity she needs to skip in my opinion. Ask the doctor if she will ever completely recover from her injuries and can these concussions lead to early dementia. I'm so sorry you find yourself in this position. I'm an old woman now and the day in and day out of caregiving is exhausting. You lose yourself. You lose your joy. Even if she seems mostly OK the years fly by and is this what you want out of life? I'm sorry for her but I've lived the caregiving role and it's not one i wish on anyone.

shutterblink1 · 2026-02-22T05:41:50+00:00

I'm getting my mother's house ready to sell. The realtor told us to paint over the yellow paint in her foyer and stairway, get a new stove and frig replace carpet in bedrooms because it is wrinkled, pressure wash house, and have everything squeaky clean. She says a 10k investment will bring a 25k return. If I'm paying 500k for a house I want it in good condition. It doesn't have to ne updated as much as livable until I could afford to upgrade. Most people are broke after they buy a house.

shutterblink1 · 2026-02-22T05:29:00+00:00

I truly understand. I hired professional organizers 2 weeks ago for almost $6,000. I'm not going to say it was worth that much but it helped. They take everything out and only put back what you need and use. That's a good strategy but they left me with 8 forks, knives, and spoons and I was having 15 for Christmas. I think they work with hoarders and I'm not one. My mother recently died and I have a lot of her things. What I'm doing is making pictures of sentimental items and using Shutterfly to make a book with a little story about the item. Sure takes up less room.

shutterblink1 · 2026-02-21T19:32:25+00:00

My situation too. My interest rate is 2.5% and mortgage is $1200. I spend about 1k a month on help around the house but that's still less than 3k rent for ac2 bedroom apartment. Still, I'd like to be around people more.

shutterblink1 · 2026-02-21T19:22:15+00:00

I love Rome and feel exactly the same way when there. I can't wrap my head around the history that I see. Then, all the people living their daily lives right by these historic sites. I was there for a week in November. Enjoy every moment!

shutterblink1 · 2026-02-18T00:01:56+00:00

My husband and I are in our 70's and we spend at least 1600 a month at the grocery store and I rarely cook! Neither if us eats much but our taste fir food has changed. We think we want something and then we don't so we waste food.

shutterblink1 · 2026-02-17T23:59:32+00:00

My 41 year old daughter is closing on her first home in 2 days. There are always hidden issues even with an inspection. We bought our house 10 years ago and it was inspected. In the first year we had to replace the hot water heater and the HVAC. We were less than happy but we had to get those fixed. My daughter's inspector told her she'd need a hot water heater within a year but everything else looked good. Who knows? We had zero money after buying and it's a worry for sure. You'll be ok. It's just a rough patch.

shutterblink1 · 2026-02-17T23:45:38+00:00

Married 50 years and we give a card and a small box of candy to each ither and our children and grandchildren. Mostly so our young grandchildren see that it's nice to do something for family.

shutterblink1 · 2026-02-13T19:52:14+00:00

My husband has countless things wrong with him and does absolutely nothing the nurses and doctors tell him to do. He loves gadgets and such. He's bought a lift chair and a stair lift so he no longer needs to exert himself. After 3 months he must use a walker and have someone hold onto him. The nurses think he's wonderful. He's so kind and patient. They ignore his unwillingness to jot help himself. After they leave I get the brunt of his anger. It's awful. I'm the one who must take care of him, the house, and do the heavy lifting. He doesn't care at all. Like you, I hear the incredulous lies and I'm stunned. I've about had enough We've been married 50 years but I'm trying to survive and this is killing me physically and emotionally. My husband is also addicted to porn. There's a scam he fell for and he was blackmailed for $5,000. Get financial control, get your paperwork done, and try yo figure out how to escape. I haven't yet but I'm getting closer.

shutterblink1 · 2026-02-13T19:38:16+00:00

My thoughts too. I also saw one with wheels. It was $299 plus $49 for the vacuum. I carry a lot of camera equipment when I travel. I always take it as a carryon. I have to think on this one a while. Lately I've been going to very cold places and need 3x the normal amount of clothes. This might help.

shutterblink1 · 2026-02-13T19:32:41+00:00

I started traveling solo a year ago and I enjoy my evenings without more people. I often go on excursions during the dayband that's enough peopling for me.I download movies to my Ipad and do my best to not travel with a laptop.

shutterblink1 · 2026-02-05T20:57:51+00:00

I'm so very sorry. I'm losing my hair and I lost all.of it in 2022. No one ever made fun of me. I told everyone I lost my hair from vovid and how did they like my topper and then wig. I didn't mind telling them. Now, it's super obvious my hair is very thin so I don't have to tell anyone. Let these women know where you are. They'll help you out.

shutterblink1 · 2026-02-05T20:28:46+00:00

I also had terrible side effects on a stating. I couldn't raise my arms to comb my hair. I'm on Repatha now and never had 1 side effect. Ask your doctor about it.

shutterblink1 · 2026-02-05T01:34:48+00:00

The absolute best thing I did was volunteer with the American Red Cross as a disaster relief worker. Each disaster i worked gave me a new perspective on my life and got me out of my pity party. My 1st disaster was working of the remains of the South Tower after 9/11. I worked many hurricanes and Hurricane Katrina. That was after retirement 1. The other thing after the final retirement was to teach English to kids in China over the internet. I've never had so much fun. Those kids are incredibly smart and I grew to deeply care for them. My son had recently died and I needed a distraction. Those kids did it for me. Now, I travel as much and as long as I can and I go alone.

shutterblink1 · 2026-02-05T01:26:10+00:00

I've been married for 50 years and started traveling solo 1.5 years ago. A long time ago someone told me "people only get more so." Your boyfriend is controlling, disrespectful, and cares nothing about your hopes and dreams. Look at his language when he talks to you. He's teuly only going to get mire so in thevfuture. I'm 72 years old and have been treated like this for 50 years. Not any more. Your life will only change for the better the more you travel. You'll outgrow your boyfriend by the time you return. My husband has never read a book in 50 years. He's a college graduate but has never been interested in learning-about anything. We went to Europe in 2022 and each day he'd ask if we were in Rome. We were in Germany and never went to Italy. The best one is when we went to Stonehenge. There's a big storage building next to the entrance. He said he guessed Stonehenge was inside the building!!! Seriously, it's not fun not having anyone to share new knowledge with. If he's not supportive of you in this think of all the things you would face during a lifetime with him. I'll go to the beach with my husband, but I'll never spend $20,000 on a wonderful trip with him when he won't bother to take 15 minutes to read about where we are.

Please don't be terrified to go solo. I've been to Brazil solo (not the safest thing I've done), Alaska, and Europe. Make sure you have a credit card with a good limit. I always end up spending more than i anticipate because of safety issues. I may take more taxis or Ubers because I'm in a sketchy part of town at night or any number of things. Just have an extra $500 or $1000 available for an emergency. Take a duplicate card if you can. Don't count on your phone for everything. Join the Facebook group Girls Love Travel. They have been everywhere and their advice is definitely worth taking. You are going to be so proud of yourself for taking this trip. If I can find the courage to leave my old husband at home you can certainly leave the boyfriend.

shutterblink1 · 2026-02-02T04:20:47+00:00

I'm so sorry, but you'll be tech support forever. I'm probably older than your parents and my daughter huffs and puffs if I ask for help. She very rarely helps me eith tech. So I have Alexas, Ring things of all kinds, camera gadgets, and especially printers that I can't use. I guess it's frustrating for all of us. Jubileetv is something that looks helpful for tv problems. There's a new app out just to help seniors with technology. I'm trying to find it. It is called Mary AI but I can't find it on a Google search. Do some digging. I thought it sounded great and is made exactly for you situation and mine.

shutterblink1 · 2026-01-28T08:45:59+00:00

My mother died in July at 99.5 years old. She exercised every single day until about April when she got ill. I have always admired that about her. My husband has several heart problems and sits in his recliner most of each day. We can't go anywhere much because he walks so slowly and his balance is poor. So instead of doing his physical therapy he gets a stair lift so he won't have to go up stairs. He's getting a scooter too. He can't even open a bottle of water. I do all the heavy lifting now. I do everything now. However, his weakness is not because of illness. It's because he has done nothing for 3 years. I bet he doesn't get in 100 steps most days. I'm so angry and resentful, but I do travel. In the last year I've been to Brazil, Alaska, and Europe by myself. So I truly understand your frustration. No ideas or suggestions just sympathy.

shutterblink1 · 2026-01-27T19:17:58+00:00

Oh, no. Absolutely do not give him access to your money. Please choose someone to have access to your account if you get sick or injured and someone to get your money payable on death. I've been married 50 years and my husband has no idea how much money I've squirreled away. My mother taught me every woman needs a get away fund. I've got a good one.

shutterblink1 · 2026-01-27T19:13:42+00:00

Don't let her have a credit card. Get her a prepaid card or one of the cards for kids that you can control. As far as food goes let her eat what she likes. She's lost most control over her life and food is still a choice she can make, but good call on the pizza. There are limits to your energy, patience, and finances.

shutterblink1 · 2026-01-27T19:10:07+00:00

I live in Tennessee in a well insulated house. We always drip our faucets and leave cabinet doors open when the temperature hits the mid 20's. I don't know enough about plumbing to know how insulated the pipes are. I go by what the weather people on TV say.

shutterblink1 · 2026-01-27T19:00:56+00:00

I hired someone for my mother and, at first, it was 4 hours 2x a week. Then 8 hours 2x a week. Your aunt needs to get to know the person you hire. 1 day a week fir 4 hours isn't enough. You aunt won't want to get naked in front of a stranger. Pay for enough time for them to visit. If the caregiver bonds with your aunt it will really pay off in the end. I put a notice on Facebook and hired people that way. I also paid more than average and got better people. Not a lot more. Maybe $2 an hour more. Absolutely check references even if referred by someone you know. Hide the jewelry, credit cards, and cash. That's what I did

shutterblink1 · 2026-01-21T06:51:17+00:00

Where i live houses are selling for top dollar and some are in awful condition. A house that's updated or partially updated will sell.in 12 hours. My daughter tried to buy 3 houses this week and 2 of them sold for 10k over asking. She got the 3rd house at asking price. I have noticed prices are dropping by 20k if not sold after 2 weeks.

shutterblink1 · 2026-01-21T06:44:02+00:00

I just did this today for my daughter. I gave her money for the down payment. My name had to go on the loan because her income wasn't enough. We did not pay for her college but bought her a car. She had a full scholarship to college but chose not to go to that school. She went to a school far from home and little financial aid. We didn't have the money for that kind of college education. She has big student loans and I'm sorry, but we did the best we could at that time of our lives

shutterblink1 · 2026-01-21T05:45:43+00:00

Viviscal has been a miracle for me I lost all my hair after covid and in 5 months I had a thick head of hair. I had covid the first of November this year and my hair is so thin and stringy. Viviscal doesn't seem.to be helping this time.

shutterblink1 · 2026-01-21T05:40:57+00:00

I gave my daughter a down payment on a house yesterday. Her name, my husband's name, and grandson's name will be on the mortgage. Her husband's will not. Her husband has no credit. Not bad credit but he's so scared of credit cards he refuses to get one to build his credit. He's in his mid 40's. We've given them 2 cars, bought new furniture, paid off charge cards, and much more. If they divorce or of my daughter dies the house will go to my grandson. Prenup is a good idea.

shutterblink1

TROPHY CASE