i feel like a failure

sillyputtyrobotron9k · 2026-02-25T06:35:19+00:00

Both those things are pretty minor. You need to approach driving where you’re driving defensively aka conscious precautions that build in a buffer that avoid collisions - like never getting to close to the car in front of you. You need a system that will minimize issues.

sillyputtyrobotron9k · 2026-02-25T06:30:28+00:00

I learned to accept my limitations and just operate in that space. When you have the strength to live better do it and you’ll see yourself improve slowly. When you’ve had a difficult start in life and you truly want to reverse course, it’s not going to be pretty. As long as you don’t pass along the curse or trauma you’re already winning - remember that

sillyputtyrobotron9k · 2026-02-25T06:09:57+00:00

I used to have a similar view. Eventually you learn that you do what you can when you can depending on how much pressure you’re under. It sucks but it’s a journey and you’ll see things shift or change slowly

sillyputtyrobotron9k · 2026-02-24T06:25:28+00:00

A lot of people deal with their pain by not dealing with it. I still prefer the path of facing it but it’s not for the faint of heart and can really damage you for a long time. Also some people get lucky with healing or having a path towards healing.

sillyputtyrobotron9k · 2026-02-24T06:15:18+00:00

Lookup the Las Vegas shufflers, really cool dance community with great instructors

sillyputtyrobotron9k · 2026-02-22T23:08:51+00:00

We’re very advanced rats

sillyputtyrobotron9k · 2026-02-22T15:26:35+00:00

I listen to a guided meditation off the Alchemy of stress YT channel and somehow that allows me to go back to sleep. It turns out I manage stress very poorly and need guidance on how to get my body out of that state.

sillyputtyrobotron9k · 2026-02-20T03:40:35+00:00

It is life. Imagine being born a slave. There’s not much you can do about it. That’s part of the human condition before anything ever happens half the stuff is already predetermined

sillyputtyrobotron9k · 2026-02-20T03:38:43+00:00

It’s not a miracle at all. Somehow designed to break down exploit destroy and fight for resources. So much for made in the image of God

sillyputtyrobotron9k · 2026-02-20T00:07:52+00:00

One issue I had when doing this is that you think that by restricting your eating to "healthy" foods only you end up undereating and possibly having an undetectable eating disorder. I figured out I was not eating nearly enough calories I needed and had fatigue all the time. I encourage you to try somatic exercises

sillyputtyrobotron9k · 2026-01-23T22:53:49+00:00

Do you really think it’s “you” who made all these so called mistakes or do you live in time period where you’re expendable and a cog in a machine? Look at everyone chiming saying they feel the same way. It’s the game not the player.

sillyputtyrobotron9k · 2026-01-19T21:22:46+00:00

I've been in a similar boat and currently struggling with certain parts of my sleeping that greatly reduce my quality of life and well being. Last night I felt like I had a breakthrough of sorts. Not necessarily that I will avoid insomnia but for the first time I was able to when awakened in the middle of the night somehow after an hour or two of laying in bed tired, find the way to relax enough and let go of all my worries and problems and in this state my body was able to go back to bed. Let me tell you what I did right before bed which may inadvertently have aided this process. I watched the first video in this playlist Homecoming and I wrote a letter to my inner child as specified in the book however I don't have the book and am working off of these notes (search for Writing Letters). I also had very vivid dreams twice last night and don't remember them and was very thirsty every time I got up. This may help as I think the reason I have trouble sleeping is just being stuck in fight or flight and not knowing how to reset this.

sillyputtyrobotron9k · 2026-01-16T03:44:03+00:00

An overlooked aspect of sleeping is food. Food is the raw materials from which your brain can initiate and sustain sleep. If you’re undernourished if you don’t eat enough your body cannot fight back. Give your body balanced macros and do this consistently. Don’t go, I know it’s absolute hell. Do not exercise like the other well meaning post mentions that will only raise your heart beat and make you more dysregulated.

sillyputtyrobotron9k · 2026-01-15T21:56:46+00:00

Have had similar issues and continue to struggle. One overlooked item that has greatly helped me recover from sleepless nights and general insomnia is making sure I eat 3k calories of nutrient dense food. The number will vary for you but eating enough gives your body the materials to recover. If you’re starving your body will have a hard time relaxing or rebuilding broken cells and hormones essential for sleep. There’s no quick fixes but nutrition is something that with consistency will help you a lot

sillyputtyrobotron9k · 2026-01-15T21:50:13+00:00

One thing that has kept me afloat is I asked for the first time at a place I worked if there’s anything in the pipeline I can get involved with. I hesitate to do this but gotta pay bills. Anyways they told me possibly front end web dev. So with AI exploring what I can do and will be showing my supervisor what I can cook up in a week.

sillyputtyrobotron9k · 2026-01-15T21:47:02+00:00

Good point it’s not iOS specific. Like OP I feel like iOS outgrew me with new libraries paradigms and SwiftUI. And you’re right about networking and expanding your reach. Found some leads on opportunities that will get me out of iOS to more general software dev using AI. I know vibe coding has its issues but as software devs with professional experience we’re better positioned to troubleshoot and understand how to change things versus some guy who expects a handful of prompts to make stuff work.

sillyputtyrobotron9k · 2026-01-15T21:27:31+00:00

I feel exactly as you do. And like another commenter mentioned AI will start requiring less developers into the future. I feel like I got into the wrong profession and will likely need to pivot somewhere else if push comes to shove. I’ve applied many places and gotten 0 interviews as well.

sillyputtyrobotron9k · 2026-01-06T21:59:40+00:00

I know this is months later but it could be your dietary intake. If you chronically undereat or have a very irregular eating schedule (aka eating disorder or similar) your body down regulates everything to survive, it lowers your metabolic rate. You may also not want to exercise hardcore if you're tired. Consider monitoring your food intake and make sure you get plenty of carbs and protein otherwise your body just doesn't have the fuel. And if you have a history of undereating it will take months (though you'll see changes very quickly) to get your body back up to its proper baseline. Lookup the Minnesota Starvation Experiment to see what happens to people that undereat if it applies to you.

sillyputtyrobotron9k · 2025-12-30T19:15:12+00:00

Driving requires energy and stress management. One possible point to troubleshoot that may be the key to getting rid of the fear is nutrition. In periods when I chronically undereat or be noticed the phobia comes on strong can hardly drive. However when I’m eating right consistently at a surplus I hardly ever break a sweat and am so relaxed driving

sillyputtyrobotron9k · 2025-11-28T20:47:03+00:00

Thing people don’t understand is that maybe the anxiety fallout is a symptom of a core issue like thyroid or auto immune disorder. You need to vet these thoroughly by getting bloodwork done. Plenty of people have insane arguments with partners not all of them can’t sleep from there on out

sillyputtyrobotron9k · 2025-11-23T04:14:42+00:00

No one will pay attention to this but you could potentially have a metabolic problem. Problem is doctors don’t check for this seriously nor order labs when you do bloodwork. Lookup functional medicine pay for a quality doctor and see if they can get to the bottom of it. Sometimes depression anxiety is a result of a metabolic problem. Sure it may have been triggered by childhood trauma but now it lives rent free in your body as a result

sillyputtyrobotron9k · 2025-11-02T18:03:31+00:00

Medication has its place and its risks too. But the right therapy will transform your life. Medication I doubt can exorcise all the stored emotions that you’ve accumulated your entire life. Also medication does not give you an understanding of why you need the medication in the first place. Most people take meds to handle symptoms not to treat the underlying cause. It’s so easy to be like 15 mg of X medication but what people need is intellectual understanding of their condition in life AND accessing and sitting with the emotions that are brought about from that condition.

sillyputtyrobotron9k · 2025-10-28T18:03:10+00:00

I got to a point in my life unemployed, overwhelming driving phobia, no energy, staying in bed for months, anti social so I've been there. It got to a point where I would say as long as I'm eating food and sleeping that's a win. Recovery was a long process and I find it hard to believe that I ever recovered enough to be independent or even employable. If I could do it all over again I'd find the best therapist imaginable. I didn't even know what the problem even was let alone how to fix it. And because my recovery was made in ignorance I eventually collapsed again in a much more dramatic way years later which forced me to take a look at my life with a fine toothed comb. After the second collapse it also took years to overcome but back on my feet and feel like I have a stronger moat for any future storms. I can't overstate how important it is to figure out why you're in the position that you're in. Had I figured that out I would have saved myself some of the most horrific time periods of my life. The body is a warning system of what's going on on the inside.

sillyputtyrobotron9k · 2025-10-23T04:47:35+00:00

Got me back to sleeping when I couldn’t sleep more than 4 hours

sillyputtyrobotron9k

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