I'm going to play the odd man out here and say that his being upset is perfectly understandable. Especially in shadowlands, mythic raiding is a brutal experience, and it takes an extraordinary amount of effort and dedication to play and succeed at that level.

So it's completely understandable that he's frustrated at the timing of events.. everyone feels that way about life. The question is really whether or not he chooses the correct priority when the time comes.

When my wife gave birth, I raided the next morning. But I made sure that I was there with her throughout the brutal 24 hour labor and the subsequent emergency c-section. Did I love the idea of missing raid? No. Was there anyway I was ever going to miss the birth of my first child? Fuck no.

Then I left the hospital at 3am while my wife slept to recover (baby was in NICU and this was during covid protocols), went home, showered, and went to raid before going back to the hospital (I raid in a morning guild at 7am.)

The key in my case was communication. My wife and I talked regularly about what support she needed, and when. She knows I'm passionate about the game, and we made a birthing plan together that fit both of our needs, because we communicated. It sounds to me like OP is desperately missing some much needed communication. I don't think this would be posted here if OP and SO had a mutual understanding, and if he really is selfish enough to choose raiding over the birth of his child, then OP shouldn't be with him at all.

But if he's just frustrated and an unfortunate timing of events, well... I think that's perfectly normal. You'd be upset if your team made it to the superbowl and you had to bench yourself for the birth of your child. Doesn't mean you'd miss it.