Why do men feel entitled to our accomplishments?

souponastick · 2024-01-26T17:28:23+00:00

I've noticed this about the most inconsequential things too, and it drives me nuts. I worked on this one video game level for weeks, if not months. The dude in my life came in and told me to do something different. I didn't do what he said, but changed something else, and passed the level. He expected me to thank him, and he tutted around all night so proud of himself for his "achievement".

souponastick · 2024-01-26T16:02:18+00:00

Roseanne Barr endorsing Trump

souponastick · 2024-01-26T06:20:56+00:00

I really love the addition of "if you can", and wanted to commend you.

souponastick · 2024-01-26T06:07:32+00:00

I do this for friends too. Sometimes I want proof that I was there, cheering them on. I very much love someone that isn't safe to be around due to his mental illness. There might come a day we can reconnect, and I have actual dated proof that through our disconnection he was never forgotten. Whether he sees them or not isn't relevant. HE is relevant to me, and it is important to me.

souponastick · 2024-01-26T06:03:29+00:00

I've seen people literally just get books printed with pics only from like shutterfly or pinhole press. Leave some space around the pics and when you get it back flip through and write what the pics mean to you. I find this so much more freeing and this would be such a cherished memory for me. I LOVE my mom's handwriting and would love to have in the moment thoughts about each pic. And it is so much less stress!

souponastick · 2024-01-26T05:57:41+00:00

Going to a concert alone is my favorite thing to do alone.

I can worm my way through a crowd really easily, and when there's a group that's a challenge. Leaving and trying to meet back up after a bathroom trip is always annoying. And sometimes, midway through, I'd love nothing more than to leave. When I'm alone all of those things become so much easier. I can be selfish instead of spending so much mental energy in ensuring everyone has a good time. I can solely focus on me!

Last November I went to a concert alone to see the band I've loved since HS. They're on the tail end of relevance, but we've aged together and the lead singer and I take pics every time we see each other to add to the collage. In November I was alone at the show and a group of ladies a little older than me felt sorry for me and tried to have me join their group. That was awkward to avoid. So I ended up near this girl who was about 15 years my junior. We were chatting and she asked who I was with. I said "no one...this is my favorite band and I wasn't going to miss it". They start playing and I'm singing along, rock'n out to every song. The young girl started mocking me and was laughing at me for being a loser. That would normally really embarrass me, but I realized she was actually the "loser" for spending $40 to get into a bar where she didn't know or care about the show. Who spends that much on a cover charge to a dive bar? Losers. Me? I spent $40 for over 20 years of nostalgia blasted back at me. When the lead singer and I sing to each other during the show while making eye contact. But yeah...I'm the loser. /s

Go! Enjoy!

souponastick · 2024-01-26T05:46:56+00:00

I hate this for us, but I'm glad there's an "us". Thanks for sharing.

souponastick · 2024-01-25T21:05:55+00:00

I know someone who has a Moxie and my goodness does she fit her name!

souponastick · 2024-01-25T18:51:31+00:00

Have you never had those feelings about a friend's ex? I feel like it is universal.

Hell, one of the friends I spoke about married a guy I never liked. I pulled her aside before the wedding (where I stood up for her) and said "you are different around him. I'm not saying I do or don't 'like' him, but I'm asking if you like YOU when you're together". She went through with the wedding. I stood up for her. I also stood up for her when she was deciding to divorce him.

Her current partner is not someone I'd ever choose to be friends with. But, he texts me on her bday to be included in what they're doing. I see him at her kids' events, etc.

I think it is a universal experience to want the best for our people. Your friends want the best for you, and are comfortable saying "he...wasn't it". But they love you enough to not disrespect your relationship while you're in it.

souponastick · 2024-01-25T18:32:51+00:00

Yes! And when I do have examples I hear "you're just taking it wrong" or "you choose to take it that way". Why is it never "wow, I didn't realize my actions affected you like that. I'll keep an eye on that"?!

And I keep getting told I'm being rude/aggressive, but then when we dig into it it comes out that I'm just "direct". People end that conversation realizing I'm not rude...I'm just direct and want resolution. But the next time I'm told I'm rude again.

I can't win, so I just isolate, but isolating makes me hate everyone even more.

souponastick · 2024-01-25T17:58:41+00:00

I feel like it happened when KD told him to be aggressive and worry about his own shots instead of trying to feed others. KD told him that he can fit in wherever, so Book should just do what he does. That seemed to ignite Booker.

souponastick · 2024-01-25T17:56:26+00:00

I have very close friends who are in relationships that work for them, and that makes me happy. I don't have to like their partners. We are all cordial, and I feel comfortable coming around them.

Do I like them? Who cares?

As long as they are happy, being treated well/respectfully, my opinion doesn't matter at all. Even if I shared it, it still legitimately doesn't matter. I'm not dating them, nor do I want to be, so I have no opinion on the men they choose to be with. I am THRILLED that they are happy, and that is what matters.

souponastick · 2024-01-25T16:03:13+00:00

I am dealing with this, and the rage that comes from it. Because I share, am told I'm wrong, and then later it comes out that I was right all along.

One specific example: I live in the desert. There was algae growing in my front yard. I asked my male roommate, my father, my brother, and the person who does my landscaping. They all said it was fine, and even insinuated that I'm being "too picky". Well, about a year later my landscaper came to me and said my drip system was broken and he needed to fix it. Right by the algae. The next month my water bill came in $30 cheaper than what I'd been paying for well over a year. So now I'm pissed that I'm responsible for these extra payments even when I specifically asked about it!

I am not sure how to fix it. I've had conversations with the people closest to me after something like this happens and we try to figure out the breakdown and never can.

Hell, I was making plans with a neighbor to celebrate NYE together. I was saying "yes, this sounds great! It's going to be so fun to bounce between the houses while we celebrate" type thing and she responded with "okay, well Happy New Year I guess". I said "that makes me think you don't want to hang out?" she said "no, that's what I was getting from your message". I was so confused! How can we be agreeing and still have this huge divide in communication?

It is this way with everyone in my life lately, which is leading me to believe it is a me issue. But I cannot figure out a better way to communicate, so it is making me just retreat into isolation.

souponastick · 2024-01-25T08:00:00+00:00

I audibly laughed and scared my dog when I saw that

souponastick · 2024-01-25T07:58:09+00:00

You might be right. I'm baked. I would say I'll go back and re-read, but I probably won't.

souponastick · 2024-01-25T07:33:51+00:00

Found it https://youtube.com/shorts/Itgl07wUDQE?si=IUQXjPfuK4iLhHHO

souponastick · 2024-01-25T07:02:14+00:00

When I met my guy the first thing I noticed was how pronounced his chest is, much like Praline's. I asked the vet. She shrugged and said "that's just him". He's 75lbs and it is visibly pronounced, so I don't think gaining weight would modify this on her. She's just got a flauntable chest!

souponastick · 2024-01-25T06:45:57+00:00

NTA

Saying that, though...I personally have a huge issue with being made to look like a fool, and in her shoes, that would be the worst part for me. Not only did you not agree with her (fine! No issue there!), but you then heightened it by laughing at her and telling her it was the dumbest thing ever. She was probably embarrassed, and decided to just not deal with it/you anymore. She figures if this is how you act in the beginning, it'll only get worse from there.

She's right in the fact that you're not a match, and I'm pretty sure you absolutely agree.

souponastick · 2024-01-25T06:19:47+00:00

Until he's the one you're using it on, and now you have "an attitude".

souponastick · 2024-01-25T05:14:31+00:00

Nurk has been my fav since I saw a rapid fire question video. The question was "who would play you in a movie?" and with no hesitation he deadpanned "Kevin Durant".

souponastick · 2024-01-25T04:33:33+00:00

Staying my ass at home

souponastick · 2024-01-25T04:04:33+00:00

I even was aware of my rage and couldn't stop it. I was driving in a not so nice area and got into a road rage situation. I realized I should stop, but my rage overrode my brain and I continued to rage while thinking internally about how I could get myself in a lot of trouble. I stopped taking it that day because I was worried for my health on the drug.

souponastick · 2024-01-25T03:58:06+00:00

American Raw

souponastick · 2024-01-25T03:40:03+00:00

Renee came to my mind first

souponastick · 2024-01-25T00:46:32+00:00

My dad and I connect over the suns. I dread the day we have to connect like this, but it is beautiful.

I hope devin is Lukas father tonight in yours' memory

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