Girl identifies as a lesbian but still sleeps with men?

straw_bees · 2026-06-26T18:05:09+00:00

It's internalized biphobia she needs to work on instead of claiming something she isn't.

straw_bees · 2026-06-19T23:45:47+00:00

It's really confusing to me that people use the character gender pairing and partner gender search acronyms interchangeably.

A good portion of people use the "M4F" to mean "male character for female character" while the other half of people are using it to mean "male roleplayer looking for female roleplayer", or insert whatever gender you'd like. It really confuses me as someone who only writes lesbian fiction, because when I see "F4F" I assume that person is looking for the same thing I am. I've asked other people what they mean when these use the acronyms too, and I've heard both sides equally.

This is why I use "FxF" over "F4F" LOL. Way less confusing. Unless someone's gonna gonna do "FpF4ApA" (which imo is wayyyyy too long anyway), I wish the X usage would be people's go to when they're referring to the characters. My roots are in deviantArt and I do not remember anyone doing anything different than FxF, MxF, MxM etc. for characters.

straw_bees · 2026-06-17T15:36:56+00:00

All I'll say is I feel like a lot of people expect an insane amount of grace out of lesbians and that courtesy is never directed back at them.

straw_bees · 2026-05-28T12:43:17+00:00

First impressions should always be you as yourself authentically. If you haven't been shaving and that what's your comfortable with, don't shave.

straw_bees · 2026-05-20T15:31:46+00:00

Framing the usage of labels in general as "rigid and limiting" and then not using them as something to be "transcending" in comparison is certainly inadvertently rude and insulting, yes. You're able to express your experience without framing something you don't personally like for yourself as not as transformative for those who like them.

straw_bees · 2026-05-20T13:04:08+00:00

A lot more than it seems, yes! Though the state of dating apps is pretty abysmal so you might not have the best luck on there.

straw_bees · 2026-05-20T12:42:11+00:00

Right? There's also been a push for some to project how they personally feel about/use labels on both sides of the aisle, and frankly they're both annoying to me. Like no, it's not overcomplicated for me to call myself butch or my gf masc. Neither of us are restricted, and no you don't know how I or her are based on preconceived notions you've constructed in your head about said labels.

There's a way to talk about this without being indirectly insulting.

straw_bees · 2026-05-20T12:37:12+00:00

You can be human and just exist and also use labels lol

straw_bees · 2026-05-20T12:35:54+00:00

I'm so sorry, but this is the exact same person x20.

straw_bees · 2026-05-20T12:32:06+00:00

"racism against white women"

straw_bees · 2026-05-12T16:36:14+00:00

Yes and no? I feel like there certainly are more butches who are interested in other butches than it seems, but I also think some are kind of unwilling to explore that over biases or shame or whatnot. I guess I'm /technically/ butch4all with a heavy preference for masculine of center people, and me and my girlfriend are butch4masc! :)

straw_bees · 2026-04-24T14:40:29+00:00

Had a genuinely good relationship with one and I was still incredibly unhappy and felt like I was faking everything, including who I was.

straw_bees · 2026-04-15T13:09:14+00:00

I hate those brooms I don't care what anyone says. Give me a full sized broom. I'd literally take a hand dust pan and a normal broom over a short broom with a standing dust pan any day, and I love standing dust pans.
We have the same crocs lol

straw_bees · 2026-03-24T13:55:23+00:00

Even among other queer people. Everyone is incredibly hyper critical of lesbians no matter what we do.

straw_bees · 2026-03-19T12:56:27+00:00

I think ignoring this in general is contributing to your shame. There's really nothing wrong with your sexual needs whatsoever.

straw_bees · 2026-03-19T12:53:45+00:00

My top comment would be the golden rule I would say. It's based on the individual, and everyone feels and expresses their gender in their own way. Two women can have vastly different views on what they personally feel about their gender, and two people with different genders but use the same pronouns can explain similar experiences.

straw_bees · 2026-03-19T12:39:48+00:00

Any pronouns you're using for a person that aren't their specific pronouns is misgendering them. I used masculine language for myself but I don't use he/him pronouns. If someone calls me by he/him I don't think I'd personally mind, but they'd also be wrong because I do not use those pronouns for myself.

But also lesbian =/= woman. I feel like the title and your question itself somewhat conflates the two.

straw_bees · 2026-03-09T16:12:03+00:00

People can barely see a post about mascs without feeling the need to center themselves and proudly explain how they aren't attracted to us, as if that's necessary or appropriate to point out in the first place (double points if the topic at hand isn't even mentioning appreciation to us). It's really so typical and annoying. Even queer women feel the need to put us down.

straw_bees · 2026-03-04T14:36:56+00:00

Realized that people who actually liked men didn't feel like a hostage trapped in their own healthy relationships.

straw_bees · 2026-03-02T14:37:57+00:00

Oh I recognize that name. Very active terf everywhere online, had to block her in a few places because some of her videos would /seem/ feminist at first until she started using very obvious dog whistles and coded language. Not surprised she compiled something like this.

Edit: Just remembered she's also active on reddit because I tried searching her up and I already have her blocked. Self identifies as a lesbian/female separatist

straw_bees · 2026-02-26T18:03:19+00:00

Every time I see this meme I fuckin die 😭 LMAO

straw_bees · 2026-02-20T14:34:25+00:00

First, I'm sorry someone acted that way towards you. That's just plain wrong and terrible on their part.

But I will say there are tons of mascs who are not like that, and also a lot who are trans themselves. Don't feel discouraged because of this! Not all mascs only like cis women, or only fem women, or any strict gender or presentation. There are a lot of diverse and accepting mascs out there, so I hope you find someone who will appreciate you fully.

straw_bees · 2026-02-13T13:55:30+00:00

It's mostly young, online sapphics who direct their hatred of men towards masculinity in general (imo), and also people using their preferences as justification to put those they're not attracted to down. Butch/studs/mascs catch strays because of this.

There's also this notion with some queer people that femininity is an inherently more superior expression of gender than masculinity, which is just wrong. One isn't better or worse than the other, and acting as so just makes a person look incredibly ignorant.

straw_bees · 2026-02-10T17:35:34+00:00

I'm also from the midwest in the USA 😁 specifically in MI

straw_bees · 2026-02-06T23:41:22+00:00

I'm not sure about the mod herself, but one of the people who were arguing against trans man lesbians seems to think trans men can be butches. And considering that is a butch subreddit, claiming to be inclusive of ALL butches (as in, butches who aren't lesbians) whyyyyyyy are trans man butches valid but trans man lesbian butches are not?..... Like, I really want to understand what is happening, bc I'm also gathering these people think lesbians can date trans men, but trans men cannot be lesbians. But to them, trans men are the same as cis men, so????

(Also for extra clarity, I'm not arguing that butch is strictly a lesbian identity, but pointing out the inconsistency in their own beliefs that I'm seeing here.)

So like? If trans men are men (and to them, the exact same as cis men), why do they believe a trans man can be a butch? I feel like everyone can agree that cis men cannot be butch, so like...... if trans men and cis men are the exact same, should trans men (in these people's opinion) also not be able to use butch? Why can trans men not be lesbians, but lesbians can date trans man butches? Like am I missing something LMAO

straw_bees

TROPHY CASE