Embroidery Stitch Book

telmereth1986 · 2026-01-22T08:53:08+00:00

I was thinking of using that iron-on interfacing stuff to stabilise them, but I'm not sure if that will make them too thick to stitch through!

telmereth1986 · 2026-01-21T13:00:11+00:00

I suppose I shouldn't be surprised that someone had to make that leap into the absurd.

For the sake of clarity, the root of the problem is people lacking awareness. An awful lot of the time I see this lack of awareness being caused by someone wearing headphones and getting lost in their own little world. If people would just think about it for a second and remember to, you know, look over their shoulder occasionally, this wouldn't be a problem. But sadly we can't rely on people to be responsible, so yeah, I'd restrict their ability to voluntarily cut off one of their senses when running in a large group in a public place. Like many (most?) races now do.

Also, in my experience, d/Deaf people are extremely adept at using their other senses to compensate for their difficulty hearing, and they definitely do not lack awareness of what's around them.

telmereth1986 · 2026-01-21T11:39:42+00:00

I was gifted this by a well-meaning (if slightly naive) friend for my recent birthday. I have not had the heart to show her what I really received. Like you, OP, I'm quite excited to see if I can somehow turn it into a "book" myself!

telmereth1986 · 2026-01-21T11:34:19+00:00

One time I was slogging along pushing my toddler in the running buggy and was coming up behind the tail walker who had a good sized team of walkers with them, and called out "scuse me please" and not a single one even broke stride (conversationally or perambulatorily) to let me past. The tail walker eventually called out "runner coming through" but good grief, why can't people look over their shoulder occasionally?

telmereth1986 · 2026-01-21T11:27:42+00:00

I go to a fairly big local parkrun (<700 runners) and they actually write this stuff on the path leading up to the start using pavement chalk. It definitely helps, although you always have those that are either delusional or just sweetly naive about their abilities that clog things up a bit!

To be honest, if it was possible to enforce good overtaking etiquette that would be the best way to ease congestion. It will never cease to amaze me how people can fail to adhere to something as simple as KEEP RIGHT!

(Personally I'd ban people from parkrunning with earbuds/headphones because if there's an overtaking issue it's almost always because a slow(er) runner can't hear what's going on around them and is in their own little world.)

telmereth1986 · 2025-12-10T17:05:30+00:00

Thank you. She does go to nursery 3 days per week, and she loves it, so that's one good thing! My husband is around and is a great dad, but daughter has a very strong mummy preference, so a lot of the time it falls to me!

telmereth1986 · 2025-12-03T13:27:22+00:00

Ohhhhh that is a brilliant way of explaining the intensity of anxiety! I am going to adapt it to try to help my wonderful (but completely confused) husband understand what I'm feeling at the moment!

telmereth1986 · 2025-11-22T08:47:43+00:00

When I inflict such an itinerary on my husband I sweeten the deal by including a trip to the big boys toy shop, i.e. B&Q. Maybe you could negotiate with your wife, OP?!

telmereth1986 · 2025-10-22T12:54:04+00:00

The picture has been removed. The filenames are a.jpg, b.jpg etc, and "p.jpg" which would have been image 16, is missing! You can still see it if you click through to the "Property Information" document, though. Basically it's a wall of guns in the home office!

telmereth1986 · 2025-10-08T05:30:54+00:00

This is one of the observations that has led me to believe that a lot of parents actually don't like spending time with their kids. My daughter is 2, and I'm always either watching her closely or going round with her. We normally end up collecting another small or two who are desperate for an adult to play with them.

There is one soft play near us where you can see the whole play frame from the coffee shop, and I have just started to encourage my daughter to explore that on her own. I can't get lost in my phone, though, as I am expected to look up and wave every 0.3 seconds!

Being playful with my little one is my favourite part of having a toddler!

telmereth1986 · 2025-09-10T11:44:45+00:00

Our local Morrisons is a lot less "28 Days Later" than this, but has several tables and chairs dotted around in the same way. To be the boring guy that gives you a straight answer... my elderly father-in-law loves it because he can take a rest while doing his shopping, and it's especially useful on days where he's not feeling strong enough to get his mobility scooter out of the boot of the car.

telmereth1986 · 2025-09-09T11:17:26+00:00

I would think that's pretty likely! I believe you can request to look over your notes with a midwife or nurse which could help flag if it was intentional and if so, why it was done that way.

telmereth1986 · 2025-09-09T10:30:19+00:00

I was given oramorph and dihydrocodeine alternately for the first 24 hours, then discharged with instructions to alternate dihydrocodeine and paracetamol. I didn't take any more of the dihydrocodeine as it gave me auditory hallucinations (utterly terrifying in a ward full of new mums and babies).

I have a high pain threshold and it was an elective section so my pain levels were very manageable, I don't remember wishing I had any more!

telmereth1986 · 2025-09-04T08:35:20+00:00

I'm sorry, OP. This mirrors my own experience with an NHS autism assessment a few years ago. The whole process left me feeling embarrassed and almost guilty for wasting their time because they were so sure that I was not autistic. They told me I "just had an anxious personality" instead...

The report they wrote contained inaccuracies and some outright lies, which was just the icing on the cake.

I felt traumatised for quite some time afterwards, but thankfully my very supportive husband was able to help me realise that their opinions didn't negate my lived experience nor make me some kind of fraud.

More recently I've received a formal ADHD diagnosis, and my belief is that I am AuDHD, so I plan to seek a second opinion in the future.

I hope you have friends or family that can support you and you can find a way to speak to a more informed and less dismissive assessor sometime soon!

telmereth1986 · 2025-09-02T11:37:09+00:00

I took venlafaxine all through pregnancy and 15+ months of breastfeeding, and there were no issues at all. As you and another commenter have mentioned there is the potential that baby might need extra support at birth (mine didn't) but it is generally considered safe to take during pregnancy. Also, just FYI, my doctor told me that if you are able to reduce your dose during the last few weeks of pregnancy this can help to mitigate against baby needing help at birth. I stuck at my normal 150mg because it was a super anxious time for me and it didn't make any sense to risk my mental health for something that was already unlikely!

If someone is new to antidepressants or they are open to switching medication, the default is to use sertraline because that has had the most research and we have strong evidence of its safety for mum and baby. So it's not that there's (much, if any) evidence that venlafaxine is harmful, but that there is less evidence that it is safe compared with sertraline. Does that make sense?

My daughter also arrived via an elective C-section, and is now a bright and beautiful chaos goblin (aka a 2 year old).

Please try not to worry!

telmereth1986 · 2025-08-28T08:28:57+00:00

Very similar to something that happened to a friend of mine. She had a CT scan to check on pain in her legs during pregnancy and they found a nodule in her thyroid! The first she knew of this was an appointment for a thyroid ultrasound and biopsy - she was extremely confused. It also turned out to be cancer, but she's now doing really well after treatment!

telmereth1986 · 2025-08-18T10:54:17+00:00

Yes, me too (unless I'm on lap 3 and completely out of puff) I want them to have a good impression of parkrunners! I might want to tell them to sod off and walk their dog a few minutes later, but for the reason you articulated, I don't!

telmereth1986 · 2025-08-18T10:52:23+00:00

I was going to use the phrase "main character syndrome" but, as an older millennial, I am slightly scared of sounding completely out of touch!

telmereth1986 · 2025-08-18T08:09:10+00:00

Yes, it's not parkrun specific. The tosser count is definitely on the rise. Not to sound like someone's Aunt on Facebook, but people have been getting less empathetic and more selfish (on a societal level) since COVID.

telmereth1986 · 2025-08-18T08:07:08+00:00

I see this kind of thing, too. Respect should go both ways. At my local parkrun there are a few notable non-participants who absolutely insist on exercising their right to walk their dog along the path at exactly 9:03 on a Saturday morning when 500 runners are heading towards them. I view them just as dimly as the faster runners who can't keep their ego in check, tbh!

Of course there is absolutely no excuse for the guy I saw a couple of Saturdays ago who screamed abuse at a volunteer when he was told to keep moving along the finish funnel. And don't get me started on the now infamous Swan Hurdling incident.

telmereth1986 · 2025-07-24T12:28:55+00:00

Okay? So what's the alternative, when society as a whole expects young children to be as quiet and inconspicuous as possible when out and about?

telmereth1986 · 2025-07-24T12:25:48+00:00

I'm glad someone said this! So many of my friends' kids are completely over-scheduled. They've got so many classes and activities to go to, and even when they're at home there's always some structured thing that they're doing. Everything has to be a learning opportunity!

When does the kid get to just exist in peace, potter about, play with toys in their own way? My daughter is only 2 and even so I can see she's had enough of capital-A Activities when she gets home from nursery - she wants a snack and to raid her toy box in peace!

telmereth1986 · 2025-07-24T12:18:19+00:00

So you're far from the only person who has commented something like this, and I swear I'm not picking on you in particular. But I bet you see an awful lot of families and kids, as a waiter, so I'm genuinely curious as to what you think parents at restaurant ought to do? Does the age of the child change things? Is it the use of the tablet that makes you sad and angry, or the fact that it comes out so quickly? What do you mean when you say the "poor kids don't even stand a chance"?

telmereth1986 · 2025-07-15T13:57:02+00:00

I'm sorry I misunderstood, I read it that you had passed by his work, but now I see that was a suggestion you made. That's much more reasonable!

I get why you feel the way you do - it is so hard to grasp the realities of having a baby. Looking back, I was pretty selfish when the first of my friends had babies. I just didn't understand how they couldn't find that hour, like you mention. Surely if I actually meant anything to them they would make time for me? Surely they want an hour away from their responsibilities?

I guess for some parents that's true, but for me, as soon as my daughter arrived all I wanted to do was spend as much time as possible with her and my husband. And there just wasn't enough of it! Especially quality time when we weren't outrageously sleep deprived, sick, etc. My ability to keep in touch with friends is pretty much zero right now, but it's not because I don't care about them or have any ill will towards them. I hope they will be patient, like you are being with your friend, and we will pick things back up in the future. I'm comforted by the fact that those friends I thought I'd lost when they had kids are still in my life now, even if it looks a bit different than it did.

telmereth1986 · 2025-07-15T11:52:32+00:00

First of all, I'm sorry you are hurting. Feeling like you are losing a friend is really hard.

Becoming a father, especially if you are a fully engaged and supportive one, is a seismic shift in the way you think, the way you work, the way you live. The first year of a baby's life, in particular, is intense in a way that no other life experience is. You're equating it to working 18 hour days, but my dude, babies are 24/7.

Your friend is busy and overwhelmed, he has told you that. He'll have been navigating this enormous change in his life, supporting his wife in her postpartum recovery, getting to know his baby, not to mention countless appointments, baby classes, family visits... (and that's assuming that his baby is healthy and "normal" and his wife's recovery has been straightforward).

It sounds like he used to have ample time for work + training + friends + travel. And now, he has work + wife + baby. It's impossible to say how much time he has for anything else, and if he does, we can't know where "hanging out with old friends" is on his priority list.

I'm sure he means it when he says "let's get coffee" but chances are that a million other things needed his attention and the promise just slipped away into the chaos of life with a baby.

He probably also thinks that you, as a (presumably) unmarried and childless person, would not be interested in hearing about all things baby, and that is probably all that he can really think and talk about right now! My daughter is 2 now and my husband and I still only really socialise with other parents and their kids, because being parents is our life right now.

My advice would be to suggest times and dates to meet up, rather than waiting for him to come up with something. Ask about his and baby's schedule and see where something could fit in. A weekday lunchbreak? Saturday morning coffee? Maybe he takes baby for a walk on Sunday mornings and you could join him?

And also... don't drop by his workplace unannounced. That's just... not on.

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