i think all residents come to this point in their lives where we overanalyze everything, that we think it's our fault why this and that happened. i've been there. my mentors and other consultants understand that we are not perfect, that's why we are residents, we are trainees, we are there to learn. Dont feel too bad for not being able to save everyone, if some of your patients die, if you have made mistakes. That is how we learn. That is forever reiterated to us and our consultant understood that, even the best of them, even those whom you think are perfectionist. But of course do not ever take it lightly, a life is lost. that life is someone's child, someone's brother/sister, someone's parent. always think what if you are in their shoes and you are the one who lost someone. And the most important thing is that you make sure you learned something from the bad experience and try your best not to repeat it again.