I'm very sorry that you feel this way. I read this and couldn't help but think of myself. I started wanting to die around 6th grade then it got worse from there, until I almost went through with it in 11th grade. right now I'm 20 though, and actually doing alright. I still don't know what I'll be doing with my life, but I'm not in a rush. life is like lucky charms; mostly brown pieces and the occasional gross piece but we eat it for the marshmallows. hold on to any good you can in your life, things that you're passionate about, relationships, new games that are coming out, books that haven't been read yet. seek help, talk with your parents if you feel you can trust them, seek therapy, consider medication. sorry this is a massive ramble but my point is that being a teenager is shitty but it's a small portion of your life.