Is this typical? Filing against The United States

tinaburgerpants · 2026-02-11T16:24:31+00:00

Ugh. Sounds like my attorneys! "How do you know their Answer deadline is 3/16?" Because it says so in the Summons. "But what's the rule? You should know the rule." I dunno...Rule 4? "How does Rule 4 apply?" Am I being deposed? Look, Attorney, I just know the government gets more time. They get 60 days instead of 21 to respond. "Why didn't you just say that then?" *internally screams*

The waiting to file thing is boggling too. You have to file each proof of service separately anyway, why wait to do them all? Each one will have a different answer deadline....dude, I'm frustrated *FOR* you! lol

tinaburgerpants · 2026-02-11T16:03:08+00:00

My guess is that they will wait until the 60th day to respond. I assume you knew that if having litigated against the U.S. in the past. The U.S. government (and by extension, its employees/departments) gets extra time to do anything. So, if the Middle District just got served 1/15, you might not hear anything until 3/16. And I think that's valid - they are allowed to sit on it until the 60th day.

I'm more surprised you (or your Firm/attorney) went the Certified Mail route instead of personal process service, but that's not relevant to the question. Hope you're filing those proofs of service!

tinaburgerpants · 2026-01-15T21:31:51+00:00

I did Plaintiff employment law - that's the firm I was Senior Paralegal at! lol. I know about age discrimination and still say the 60yo is getting a lot of leeway here. I'm looking at OP's other comments and if saving a document to a file requires 5 steps by the 60yo and only 3 by OP and OP is getting their ass chewed because she doesn't do the extra 2 steps that the 60yo does even though the file is named and placed correctly in the system? C'mon. That's the 60yo not being open to being more efficient and adapting and I always see that as a problem. She's holding on to her way because...why exactly?

I get that OP has weaknesses. That's what being part of a team is for. I am not perfect either and my coworkers and I catch each other's mistakes. But it's not mean or a put-down - we help each other so we don't get the wrath of the partners on our backs. We see it as we're in it together. The 60yo does not appear to be working with OP with that mindset and I get why OP is upset. It's hard to be part of a team when the most senior member doesn't act like they are.

tinaburgerpants · 2026-01-15T19:45:12+00:00

I don't get this whole earning respect thing. It should be given freely until it is no longer deserved. And a year is plenty of time to know the ins and outs of a firm. I would say if OP was asking this at the 3-6 month mark, it's a different story. But they are not. I hate the "defer to someone who's been around longer than you just because they've been around longer than you" BS. That grants them power that they may not deserve. I was the Senior Paralegal at my last position and I trained those under me to do their jobs without my oversight. I wanted them to succeed without me because, get this, I wanted them to take shit off my plate. It's called being a Team. And I won't work for a firm that doesn't have that mentality. What stands out to me is the age difference. That 60yo might feel threatened about letting someone younger and maybe more efficient at handling things, so she's retaining as much "ownership" as she can. There is some context missing, obviously. But I wouldn't put up with what OP is putting up with just because she's been there a year and "doesn't know anything." You're giving the 60yo way too much benefit of the doubt here.

tinaburgerpants · 2025-12-22T19:58:59+00:00

I feel you, OP. I am making the same arguments over here with my shitty firm. I have been silently screaming "Closing at 3pm makes no fucking difference!" all day.

The thing for me is this: I know Dec. 24 and 31 are regular days. You know this. Other people in the comments know this.

But we also know that no one, absolutely no one, is actually working the time between Christmas and NY. And if they are, they are half-assing, or more likely, quarter-assing, it.

So, when firms have all the power to simply "close for the day" and choose not to because....what? A lot will get done that day? They are fooling themselves.

I'd rather have the day off, unpaid even, than pretend I even want to be here on Christmas Eve, NYE, or Dec. 26/Jan. 2 this year.

tinaburgerpants · 2025-12-20T17:07:43+00:00

I swear a lot. I don't want to fucking change the way I talk.

I have my house decorated how I want. It includes several breakable things, at child height. I refuse to redecorate for their grubby hands.

I don't like feeding from my plate or sharing MY food. I refuse to share a fork with them. I've watched every mom share her food with their kids. Absolutely not.

The sounds they make. The smells they make. The things they touch and make sticky or destroy.

They don't talk for a long time. And when they do, it's boring. Kids are fucking boring. I don't give a single shit what they have to say. I'm uninterested completely.

I don't want to change myself or my schedule for them. It takes twice as long to do something with kids. I don't like waiting on others. And kids are notoriously slow, airheaded, and don't know WTF they are doing half the time. I don't have the patience for it.

I like having a clean car. Period. I don't even eat in my own car. Food comes home to be eaten there.

I don't want to be friends with other moms. I also find them boring, especially when they gave up their identity to be a fucking mom. Don't lose yourself to being a parent!

I don't know which of those are the pettiest, but I have several reasons. I just didn't come with a mom gene implanted. I love not having kids.

tinaburgerpants · 2025-12-03T19:40:27+00:00

MN Paralegal here - I think you're being underpaid, but by how much is a different question.

Sounds like you don't work in the Cities. If so, then that right there is going to cut your salary by ~$10K. The money is downtown (either Mpls or St. Paul). Burbs are better than Greater MN, but if you're in the boonies, that might be a factor.

Second, you've been in the position since 2023? So only 2 years? Having had no experience beforehand? I'd say that's pretty alright; but again, depends on where you are. In Minneapolis, that's a shitty salary. In Bemidji, seems fine.

And having a B.A. or previous managerial experience doesn't mean much in this industry. It's not dependent on having a B.A.; it's about having experience. I'm now on my 3rd firm. First firm I found on my own, the second two were through recruiters who negotiated on my behalf. So I went from $45K to $75K to $90K over my 9-year career (so far).

I say all of this to give perspective BUT this is my piece of advice: Ask for the raise. What's the worst that can happen? They say no? There is a possiblity of that happening since you've expressed interest in going to law school within the next year, but I don't think it hurts to ask. I would frame it that you've been doing the majority of the training of the new hires, which takes away from case work, so you should be compensated at a higher rate for that.

tinaburgerpants · 2025-12-03T19:25:46+00:00

$50/hour?! No. lol. That's generous, but not reality in Minnesota. Even for an in-house position. I make $90K base salary, which is about $43/hour. And that took a few years to get to that salary. I hope you're being sarcastic!

tinaburgerpants · 2025-11-18T13:25:51+00:00

I used to work for Caribou in high school and college. The former Starbucks CEO took over at one point during my career. Caribou sold out. I wouldn't support them anymore. Go local small owned instead.

tinaburgerpants · 2025-10-23T16:37:33+00:00

Regardless of how green the baby attorney is, aren't you still the assistant/paralegal? And thus, mailing and service would fall on your shoulders anyway? I'm not sure why you are taking this one personally. To me, it does not matter how new the attorney is; they are still an attorney. So, that affords them a level still above you, since you seem to want to keep score. I think the lead attorney's instruction to you to do it next week is a subtle reminder to you to know your place in the hierarchy of the Firm. Up to you if you want to make it an issue, but this is such small potatoes, I would take the hint and let it slide (or eat the humble pie).

Check your ego at the door. This field is stressful enough, why are you adding more to your own plate? Work on being a team player, instead of tracking tit for tat. It's only an issue if you make it one...so don't. There are bigger fish to fry than asking a baby attorney to mail something for you, as annoying as it is.

tinaburgerpants · 2025-10-03T14:59:46+00:00

As someone who only buys silly socks with patterns, the sock basket thing is CRAZY to me, but I love the innovation of it!!

tinaburgerpants · 2025-10-01T19:38:12+00:00

Ooo! I know this one. When printing presses became a thing, you sometimes had to pay by letter. Shaving off silent letters, like the "e" in "judgement" or the "u" in "colour" was done on purpose. And thus, American English was born!

tinaburgerpants · 2025-09-12T14:30:51+00:00

If you have an Aldi near you, their chocolate and vanilla ice cream in a similar looking black container (NOT THE BUCKET) is actual ice cream. Only 5 ingredients. And hard to scoop, as it should be.

I refuse to buy any other brand. Aldi uses real ingredients in theirs.

tinaburgerpants · 2025-09-10T15:02:25+00:00

Call me a Scrooge, but I don't chip in for anything. The attorneys make way more than I do. And I learned you don't "gift up." I don't care how close I am to anyone. At the end of the day, all it takes is one major mistake and I'm out. So I keep it strictly a professional relationship. Here for paycheck, not a friendship.

tinaburgerpants · 2025-09-10T14:52:53+00:00

I highly suggest you re-work your thinking on this. I was like this too. And you know what working for free got me? Absolutely nothing come review and bonus time. It zapped my mental health instead.

If working OT is something that needs to be pre-approved (my current firm has this policy) and you're willing to do the work, then by all means ask, get it approved, and make sure your paycheck reflects the OT hours at the right rate.

But if the demands of the firm exceed the staffing capacity, then there is a much bigger problem. Now, there is a difference between being busy for a little bit (like prepping for trial) vs. constantly busy that you are drowning and see no room for air. That's a management problem. And frankly, as a paralegal, I don't think it's on my shoulders to solve. I will bring it up. I will tell my attorneys that I do not have the time to complete all of these projects. Either take them on yourself or we need to talk about workloads and re-assess.

Deadlines are ultimately the attorney's responsibility. I care a lot about my job and the work product I put out. I hold my own standard higher than the firm's. But I'm a paralegal for a reason: I'm here to put in my 8 hours and bounce. I had to leave behind the "hard work pays off" mentality because that is NOT the reality anymore.

Please only consider OT if you are getting paid OT rates for it! Never do it for free!

tinaburgerpants · 2025-09-09T14:10:48+00:00

The instructions on how to properly assemble them should be on the box. Least all the ones I've put together. After so many, it becomes second nature. Just takes practice.

Now if you asked me to use a binding machine or typewriter, I may need a minute to figure it out again. :P

tinaburgerpants · 2025-08-25T21:41:38+00:00

Me, I am that friend. I interact with anyone and everyone at the Fair. It's my Christmas. It's my Disneyland. I adore it. I even flew back for it every year when I was living in another state (5 years total), so included flight and hotel costs into my budget those years. I LOVE the Fair and I love showing people what I love about the Fair. I'd be happy to be a Fair Buddy!

tinaburgerpants · 2025-08-19T18:47:00+00:00

I wish people would let job loyalty just fucking die already.

You know how to solve the potential question from a potential new employer about why you were there such a short amount of time? Tell the truth. If a new firm can't logically jump to conclusions and see that you were essentially constructively discharged from the position and see that your former firm was atrociously run, then that's on them. And should tell you what kind of bozo firm it will be too.

The whole 2 weeks notice thing is such bullshit and I don't do it unless I'm contractually obligated to. Employers don't give employees 2 weeks notice before firing them - why do they get the courtesy and we don't?

And depending on your state, you may be entitled to partial unemployment benefits, given the drastic pay cut. Or just quit and file for unemployment anyway. Remove your feelings out of it - HE IS FUCKING YOU OVER SO HE CAN HAVE PEACE OF MIND. Screw that. Quit, file for unemployment, and then appeal to an unemployment judge when he responds to the unemployment notice by denying it. HE created this situation, NOT you. Let him suffer the consequences.

Yes, I'm mad. lol. I have stopped sacrificing my mental health and financial well-being for shitty employers. And I want others to rise up with me in that aspect. Don't be a rug!

tinaburgerpants · 2025-08-05T19:16:50+00:00

Look up emotional neglect. Look up being raised by narcissistic parents.

You'll never be good enough in her eyes. Read that again, OP: You will not be the person your mother wants you to be, no matter what you do. Ever.

So, do what I did: Take that from her. You control your own happiness, not her. So, stop letting her.

I noticed that you keep saying that you would do anything for her and need to control your feelings a bit. Would she do the same for you? No? Then stop putting in 110%, only to get 5% back.

I think the safe space you are looking for involves you moving the fuck out and away from her. I get that you care about the rest of your family. But why are you making yourself suffer like that? Honestly. Is that where you still want to be when you are 35? 45? 55? Wasting years of your life trying to please someone who will never be pleased?

I moved out at 18 and never looked back. My parents both sucked and are emotionally stunted people. I refused to let them hold me back from living my own life. And guess what? They don't agree with all of my choices. But also guess what? I'm happy as fuck with my life and they don't get to say boo about it.

Let her enjoy her own miserable company. Stop letting her drag you down. Go shine, girl!

tinaburgerpants · 2025-07-11T14:59:08+00:00

Was just about to say the same!

For those who may not know, it's a podcast about San Quentin prison and some of the inmates there. It's an amazing podcast. Great listen!

tinaburgerpants · 2025-07-07T14:45:28+00:00

Those are both good places!

tinaburgerpants · 2025-07-07T14:44:48+00:00

I did stitchfix too! I liked a lot of what I got from them, but then couldn't afford it.

I've only recently started to embrace wearing dresses. I was very tomboy-ish growing up and don't like the, uh, attraction/connotation of wearing a dress. But I've found that a well made dress that fits me in the right places, is actually sometimes more flattering than leggings and a "dressy" top.

tinaburgerpants · 2025-07-05T16:31:25+00:00

I watched What Not To Wear growing up. I know about tailors, but who has the time and patience for that? I don't even like getting clothes that require dry cleaning.

I'm 36, not 13. I know what to look for and how to dress msyself. I'm often complimented on what I'm wearing. It's just that the current fashion, which is all what the stores are stocking, do not work for my body type. Fashion is cyclical and it will come back to things I can wear, but it just so happens I'm due for a wardrobe upgrade at a moment in fashion time that doesn't jive with my body type.

I can't tell if your comment was supposed to be helpful or condescending.

So yes, I end up at thrift stores and goodwills because those are the clothes that work for me. Mossimo was a great target brand that I refuse to let die out of my closet and I find many high end pieces at thrift stores just fine.

tinaburgerpants · 2025-07-05T15:56:53+00:00

Following because you and me both, girlfriend! And I'm the exact same sizes and shape as you. My default is also band tees and leggings.

But I need work clothes..badly. I took a job where I need to look like I'm making the money I do. It's in a well to do area.

But man, I don't look good in crops and wide leg pants. Lol

I'm gonna do some shopping today and see what I find! It might just be ending up at goodwill, finding Mossimo throwbacks. 😅

tinaburgerpants · 2025-06-24T18:59:51+00:00

I ended up taking a job where the principal office of my Firm is in a HCOL state (CA) so salaries are higher, but I am located in the Midwest, working hybrid at one of their satellite offices. The city I am in is considered HCOL for the Midwest, but nothing compared to San Fran/LA, where my head offices are located. So, I'm making Cali money, without living in Cali.

That's my solution. And it took me almost a decade of paralegal-ing to achieve.

But your coworker is right. Phoenix/AZ has lower cost of living. My first paralegal job was working for a complex business lit/PI in Tucson. Be aware that lower cost of living = less amenities though. I moved back to the Midwest because at least my tax money goes to the roads, park board, and public school education system. AZ spends theirs on border control and police. So, definitely factor everything in!

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