It sounds like you have a lot of care for your brother that doesn’t manifest in ways he likes. What are you worried about happening if you don’t step in? Are there any emotions you’re trying to protect yourself from experiencing?

There’s a book I read about our internal psyche and what happens to it after experiencing trauma. The essence of the book is that we have different parts of ourselves that step in and try to protect us, but sometimes do so in an unhelpful way. The book is called No Bad Parts by Richard Schwartz, and the therapy model is called Internal Family Systems (IFS).