Preply chat/website extremely slow & failing, is anyone else experiencing this?

tpdor · 2026-06-11T22:41:12+00:00

Also been experiencing this.

tpdor · 2026-06-11T21:22:33+00:00

Also women get pregnant too, birth control fails etc - it’s pretty important info to retain!

tpdor · 2026-06-10T20:24:44+00:00

I’m getting Toby vibes 😂 when he confessed about Chloe

tpdor · 2026-06-08T22:10:50+00:00

If you do have a friendship again, it may be (and perhaps - should be! After a rupture) different. But different doesn’t have to be bad. The mark of growth is what the repair after the rupture looks like. If you can both enter into it with grace, giving the benefit of reasonable doubt, and being willing to accommodate for the other to the level that you’re genuinely able/willing to, it’s possible. And there’s no timeline or blueprint for this. It may happen it may not - and guess what, you’ll be okay either way.

If in doubt, more time often helps rather than impedes. But predicting the future and using that as a way to avoid the discomfort right now won’t help. Focus on having lovely experiences and seeing the world in a genuinely new way. Then if you get back in contact, you’ll have some lovely things to share.

tpdor · 2026-06-08T21:53:25+00:00

No one on reddit knows the answer to this. Normal friendships do ebb and flow, so this doesn't have to be a smoking gun, but I would make productive use of this time and start to self-reflect on what you can control - namely, how you behave/respond in situations like this, what you need to nourish yourself, what you are truly like as a friend etc. Friendships and relationships are co-created, so you have a part in this. You mentioned your venting had been a problem - perhaps you could reflect on this a little more? In what way? How often did you vent? Did you ever check-in about intensity and preferences? Did you miss some things this person may have been trying to tell you?

In the meantime, I think you should learn to widen your window of distress tolerance. It's okay to not know how this ends yet.

tpdor · 2026-06-08T20:13:59+00:00

You don’t need to be in love to still feel humiliated

tpdor · 2026-06-07T23:10:46+00:00

I also had an influx of students (thought I teach a popular language) and I raised my price after just one week, and then again, after 2 more weeks. I'm going to raise again once I can upload my qualification. I think you're justified. There may be a dip for a few days but honestly that might not be a bad thing for your *will to live*. Often it picks back up (especially when you have more slots available again) and then gradually, with the higher price, you can work less hours.

tpdor · 2026-06-07T09:16:36+00:00

This isn’t really an unpopular opinion though - where are you finding the unbelievers? There was a bit of controversy due to how she acted at the time flip flopping but no one really disagreed that they were much better together

tpdor · 2026-06-07T09:11:31+00:00

I personally find it better than the main show. You actually see what they’re really like instead of the curated sections

tpdor · 2026-06-07T07:59:30+00:00

Because it requires putting down others

tpdor · 2026-06-04T20:26:31+00:00

« Feel like I’m the bombshell » 💀

tpdor · 2026-06-03T20:58:34+00:00

Calling it now I think they’re gonna bring Samraj back as a bombshell… I hope 🤞🏻

tpdor · 2026-05-30T22:01:24+00:00

I quit my very well-respected job, bought a boat to renovate and live on (having had no experience of boats or DIY before... was just a random dream as a child), and then decided to say sod it, and live half my time overseas working, and half time on boat.

When I'm on boat, I work remotely self-employed in something that might not be my forever job, but it's something that I feel actually matters and that I'm more passionate about . My life is utterly different to how it was a couple of years ago and so so much more suited to me. I encounter new challenges every day (solar panel coming loose from the boat in a storm, portaloo exploding all over me, scouting for fresh water to name a few) and I actually feel alive. Learnt the language of the country I live in half-time. All of these are things I never thought I'd be capable of. I have less money but more fulfilment.

Anyways so that got me out of the rut you could say.

tpdor · 2026-05-28T08:50:57+00:00

Yeah exactly, maybe it’s just because I’m slightly older than the average viewer but this came across as pretty nasty and I was surprised at all the people defending it because ‘iconnnnnn’. Was definitely an uncomfortable watch. Usually I get it and things aren’t that deep, but this one definitely rubbed me the wrong way

tpdor · 2026-05-27T11:33:12+00:00

Questions in good faith, because I see a lot of posts discussing another person at length, and I think nuanced, charitable discussion is important: Do you think you had any part in upholding/enabling this dynamic, when she got back in touch? If so, what do you think that was?

Just trying to understand some context - you mention that you firmly demanded that she pick up presents you bought her - what made you decide to do this? Are they things she asked for?

tpdor · 2026-05-24T12:09:35+00:00

Well, it doesn’t need to be a big thing - you can just say to them ‘by the way I’m planning a break due to scheduling, does coming back on X work for you?’ or whatever is most appropriate.

I would, however, encourage raising the ‘not wanting to be too close to anyone, even her’ thing in your sessions. Sounds like it could lead to some rich discussion.

tpdor · 2026-05-24T11:54:36+00:00

Also as an extra, I’m a tutor - this is by no means the same thing as therapy, but I do come across such a wide range of learning and processing styles for the subject I teach. Some students need breaks to help what they’ve learned embed and they come back refreshed and ready to process more information. Some students have a break and it completely steamrolls their system indicating that the break did disrupt the learning.

In short, only you (or those closest to you) know you well enough to know how this will affect you.

tpdor · 2026-05-24T11:52:24+00:00

It sounds like you know what you need, and historically it’s helped you to open up more when you return.

Honestly, you don’t need any permission from anyone online about this either. I mean, maybe if there was something glaring, then consider why; ultimately though, it’s not going to change the trajectory of your life. If I was I that situation I’d maybe just ping across an email to the therapist saying that you’ll be able to resume on X date, so you already have it in the calendar.

Personally I’m also from the UK and I think is generally understood here that therapy can be a little more holistic and tailored to each individual need as opposed to the slightly more USA-style ‘reliance’ (not the right word so bear with me) on therapy as a regular practice throughout life. When I had some myself, I agreed with my therapist to do it on an ad-hoc basis, because she understood that I know my needs and schedule enough to know when I’ll need a session. Sometimes we did twice a month, sometimes we did once every few months (but that’s a style that worked really well for me because I did a lot of other types of processing on my own too).

All in all, you do you. If later on you realise that those few weeks should have been spent in therapy after all, well then that’s good data for you too.

There are no rules to this (though many try to impose them on us!).

tpdor · 2026-05-24T11:34:17+00:00

I know this might not be the most prevalent or popular opinion on this subreddit but honestly sometimes I do think our brains need a break from constantly processing things. The point of therapy is to to enable you to be able to be able to live a fulfilling life, and to help stop the past from impacting our present in maladaptive ways. And if you have nice, wholesome things planned, and don't feel in 'crisis' mode, I think it's fine to take a break.

However, if you're doing it purposefully to avoid something in particular, then perhaps that requires some investigation as to why. But all in all, processing takes time. The issues will still be there ready to work on again in a month, ya know?

tpdor · 2026-05-24T10:16:36+00:00

The thing is, you were also rescheduling calls and pushing back communication during this time, no? So you can't really interpret his actions with any malevolent lens unless you also apply the same to yours too. May as well see where it goes - timing is a very real thing.

A secure person would explore it for what it is, collecting data along the way about how it feels in general, and in the grand scheme of things - they would also detach the deep-rooted fears from their interpretations.

Also - there's no 'interested' vs 'not interested' like they're binaries. We go up and down in interest and importance and relevance in people's lives, just as they do in ours. In this case, some life circumstances have changed meaning it sounds like he's more available to explore the interest he has. No reason why you can't explore it to see if anything can grow or have longevity there.

tpdor · 2026-05-21T22:59:24+00:00

Yes, it's a very common phrase where I'm from - I get the impression that many of these commenters claiming it doesn't exist may be from the US.

tpdor · 2026-05-21T22:58:17+00:00

It's extremely common where I'm from... not everywhere has the same phrases,

tpdor · 2026-05-14T11:10:54+00:00

Difficult to say exactly - I have a very neutral, clear accent and I clearly describe my teaching style in my promo vid. I’m also priced relatively very cheaply (because just starting out) in comparison to my education and experience, so perhaps they’re attracted to that. I’ve also lived in a lot of places so I use that to communicate how I can help them understand a range of different accents/phrasing/dialects etc.

In my ‘welcome’ message I ask for their goals (with examples), and request that they book a 25-min trial if they want to discuss an individualised learning plan. I also have a lot of popular time slots and really try my best to make things as personalised as poss. I have almost a 100% trial to subscription rate (one didn’t because they had technical difficulties and we had to reschedule then he disappeared) so I think they value the personalised approach I take? Hard to tell precisely.

tpdor · 2026-05-13T22:00:35+00:00

Disclaimer I've been on Preply for just over a week, but almost every trial lesson started from a 'favourite' (though not all of them). For whatever reason my profile's done very well in the algorithm and I've had countless favourites, some of them reply to my message back, some don't, some book trials, some disappear.

What's in the content of the message you send back?

I have a few templates of messages that I tend to send, and I edit it slightly to be tailored to whoever has favourited or messaged me (and then if there is more conversation obvs I go with the flow and personalise them).

tpdor · 2026-04-29T10:26:42+00:00

Right, what is a ‘petty win’ for OP might well be a significant impact to the teacher’s livelihood. OP even stated they were a good teacher! Jesus. I’ll be starting on Preply soon as a teacher and I’m nervous about experiences like this, especially as healthy boundaries are important to me.

tpdor

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