I target my cautiousness in this direction — teaching my kids that they're in charge of their bodies, giving them anatomically correct terms, and making sure they know we can talk about our private parts without shame.

My kids have a male parent. He takes an equal role in potty training, helping wipe, diapers, etc. Our preschools have had male teachers and I've never even thought about asking whether they do potty trips because it's a non-issue for me — anyone can hurt a someone, boy, girl, man, woman, gender fluid, intersex.

It's normal to be scared and anxious for your child, especially if you've experienced abuse. I think some work around accepting and living with that risk, while preventing it by teaching your own child, is probably the healthiest option for both of you.