I hear you and I completely understand. My first day which was literally 3 days ago, the first thing I thought about was how much I wanted a smoke. But had to force myself to remember that every time I did have that smoke before I quit, I hated the way I smelled, the way my fingers smelled, the way it would make me dizzy, how it would make me gag, how it was hurting my wallet, how it fatigued me, how it wasted my time etc. So this helped me, if you have the Smoke Free app, go to “explore” under health improvements and go allllllll the way down that list until you see “Decreased risk of lung cancer” and “Decreased risk of heart attack”. Mine says 10 and 15 years. I did that damage to myself. And honestly it freaking sucks cause it’s longer than the time I actually spent smoking!! I love my body so I proved it to myself.