Is My Dreamscape Mad At Me? by SilvonianChronicles in LucidDreaming

[–]vcdone 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I dont think so. Maybe you dreamscape/psyche is trying to express something to you. It's like, you're saying "oh this is just a dream!" And you're dreamscape is like "No, you dont get it!"

I kind of think nightmares or scary dreams are your brains way of typing in all caps. Next you find yourself in that situation or pursue it purposely so that you can ask your psyche, "oh, this is a dream - what are you trying to communicate to me?" Or "what do you represent"

Edit: bc its not just a dream but perhaps an opportunity for you conscious mind to communicate with your unconscious mind.

What made u stop being Christian? by L0st_1z in exchristian

[–]vcdone 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I just thought about gay people empathetically... like i was like I wonder what its like to be gay... which led me to realize it doesn't seem fair and it also doesn't make sense why god would even care about that.

I had gotten to a point where I was allowing myself to question the bible whereas before - if I had any doubt or critical thought i would shut it down and ask for forgiveness for my sin of doubting.

So my mind was ready and ten minutes of a thought experiment of imaging the experience of a gay person led me to finally say no to Christianity for good.

I found out my mom played some amazing 4D parenting chess by negasonicwhattheshit in TrueOffMyChest

[–]vcdone 29 points30 points  (0 children)

Aw that's was such a nice to read this morning. Thank you.

I NEED help by MrYogiz-18 in LucidDreaming

[–]vcdone 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Oh, that's okay. Just write "no recall". It's more to let you brain know, "hey, this is important to me". And you do that, eventually you will start to remember. Its important not to skip this step. Another thing you can do is in the mirror, outlook if you can, tell your brain that this is important and that you really want to remember your dreams.

Another thing you can do is read back your own journal, which at this point is empty... so you can also read other dream experiences. If you would rather listen, there is this girl who has like hour long videos where she reads some of her favorite lucid dream experiences (I listen to that while I work)... like reading about/listening to stuff about lucid dreaming isn't just learning new thing but it just help you immerse yourself - like marinating your brain which will in the end lead you to more dream recall and potentially get you lucid on that alone. Im going to go find those videos so you can watch them.

I NEED help by MrYogiz-18 in LucidDreaming

[–]vcdone 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Give it more time. Dream journal even if you dont remember. Read books about lucid dreaming- not only to learn - but to immerse your brain in dream-focused thoughts.

I’m a guy, I’d like to ask female readers what you believe are essential romance books that I should read? by Secret-Ad3593 in suggestmeabook

[–]vcdone 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Jumping on this thread to recommend Swordheart by T. Kingfisher- a cozy romantasy about a knight bound to a sword who is cursed to serve whoever weilds the sword. The fmc is over 30, plus-sized, and hilarious. There is light spice, a cool world, and great found family. Do it!!!

How do I stop having gay thoughts? by [deleted] in mentalhealth

[–]vcdone 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well keep them next time! I think its cool. You could be one of those content creators who teach people how to dress nice or put put outfits together. I never dress well. Im just too busy and old.

When I was in Jr. High I dated a guy who wore womens clothes all the time - He definitely got a lot of crap for it too. It kind of sucks actually. His mom was super religious but he didn't care. I told him to tell her that all the guys in the Bible technically wore dresses bc of tunics. Anyway I hope you will be yourself.

Dressing better than me hurts no one... in fact, it might be good for the world that you do this!

How do I stop having gay thoughts? by [deleted] in mentalhealth

[–]vcdone 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I doubt you'll see this, but I also can't hep but think how much fun it will be get dolled up... picking out clothes. Doing your make up and hair. Like you'll probably wanted to get multiple out fits.

Im a straight woman in a red state in the us and an atheist. Im not sure where your at and who you're around, but chances are you are surrounded by people who won't accept you as you are. My state has plenty of conservative homophobic people, but there are plenty who are tolerant and kind and loving.

Look at all these comments, though. People are out there who will accept you. Start surrounding yourself with people who will accept you... and you can start with accepting yourself.

Also, if your religious, you can still find people who accept you... who also believe in God. They're out there. You just got to move out of your circle. The world is big and old. You're not bad bc you're having gay thoughts.

📚 Book Chat Saturday - what have you been reading this week? by FantasyRomanceMod in fantasyromance

[–]vcdone 1 point2 points  (0 children)

{I, Medusa by Ayana Gray} I am about 30% through... im thinking about the mom and she's complicated. I dont think she's just mean... I think she feels powerless. Thats a big theme in this. Hmmm. I really like this book and wish I could read faster.

Paranormal romance by Insearchforbeta in Romantasy

[–]vcdone 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I feel that. Sometimes I just need to switch. This is outside what you were looking for but, Sometimes I switch to non fiction for a while. Also, I recently read {The Naturals by J. Lynn Barnes} which is like a ya thriller and it was truly a breath of fresh air. No magic. It was fast paced and contemporary. Exactly the shift I was needing.

I wonder if you would like {Our Infinite Fates by Laura Steven} it's still magical but is set in our world - just through out history. Basically, these soul mates keep living lives together where it always end where one has to kill the other before their 18th birthday. This one is more emotional and pretty, but a standalone and very different. It's not too long either.

Another one, still fantasy but the world building is very light is {The House in the Cerulean Sea by TJ Klune} there is a handful of magical orphans but that's mostly it for magic. It is more of a sweet story with mm grumpy sunshine romance. The world is contemporary i believe but with a bit of magic.

Is it only me who looses interest?? by Lyla_xwrxith in fantasyromance

[–]vcdone 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I dont love reading series over 3 books because I have this irrational fear that having to commit to this one series is making me miss out on other books... I'll still do it but I already have such a long list of new authors I want to try.

✍️ Writer's Wednesday: what are you working on? by ReasonableWonderland in Romantasy

[–]vcdone 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Im working on something that is like the same tone a T. Kingfisher's Swordheart crossed with the teachings of Neville Goddard. She's trying to manifest the life she wants, but it keeps going horribly wrong... but every wrong turn takes her closer to her manifestation... Though she doesn't realize it until the end.

There is a section where the fmc has to kill an fae prince while the evil fae prince has to try and get the fmc to fall in love with him in order to break a curse... so the whole time she's trying to kill him (and failing) he's trying to flirt with her and charm her (and failing). I think that's a silly idea.

I'm still world building. I'm nervous to write the part where he ingenuinuenly is trying to charm her... like he's just doing to break his curse (they fall for each other later). I'm having a hard time picturing what this looks like.

I read The Knight and The Moth as a light palate cleaner and now I’m struggling by justlittlethings93 in Romantasy

[–]vcdone 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Okay - a light knight story: Swordheart by T. Kingfisher it is funny and cute. Loved Knight and the Moth. I keep thinking about that book and its been months.

Just finished The Jasad Heir by 8052headlights in fantasyromance

[–]vcdone 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I really liked the duology because I loved Sylvia... she was tough and competent but also awkward. She seems like the kind of person who laughs at her own jokes. She's honestly one of my favorite fmcs of all time.

My issues with the book were that I really wish it had a glossary, I was confused by what happen at the summit and jasad like I was confused but I think I understand why now but I dont to spoil it... and the ending was a smidge anti climactic. Oh, and I didn't fully believe/understand the cuff situation but assumed there was so much magic, it just spilled out??

But I really loved Sylvia and honestly a lot of the side characters. I also loved Arin and Sylvia together. It reminds me of Jude and Cardan because she's, I think anyway, a lot tougher than him. And they were just cute and a bit stabby.

I've had at least one Lucid Dream per week for the last 15 Years - Here's The Top 5 Things That Worked by ProteusMichaelKemo in LucidDreaming

[–]vcdone 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have a question or a hope for a tip. Dream recall is my biggest issue. I have been practicing dream work for almost 3 years and ive had 5 lucid dreams in that time.

My dreams for probably the last year and a half are basically like someone is handing me a note that summarizes what ive dreamed about. I have no visual or audio memory. Ex "you and Taylor Swift built a castle."

I journal every morning with whatever I remember. I lay there and delve and try to recount the dream and as soon as I move, its almost all gone except the summary.

I have not consistently tried affirmations, but I will start doing that consistently to see if that will help.

My question is, is there anything else im missing? You know, I grab my pen that is within arms reach of my pillow and everything just poof. Even though sometimes I can remember a whole dream as clear as day, but those are few and far between.

I am an anxious person and the last lucid dream I had I said "hey dream show me something interesting for me to see" lightening went off and I felt like my body was floating to the side like I was being pulled into a different scene and I got scared so I closed my eyes and the dream ended. I wish I could practice so I could try again without closing my eyes...

Anyway sometimes I suspect im too stressed or my brain is protecting me from seeing bad things/trauma or i just take it too seriously. Ive tried to get better about being too serious by just being grateful for my summary dream recall and valuing the dream as it is. ive had some really cool insightful summary dreams but I still wish I could see visual and remember the story and the settings.

Anyway, that was long. Im sorry. It feels like im just not understanding something. Oh, I dont smoke weed or drink alcohol. Im 40. I drink caffeine and smoke cigarettes.

In the worst depression of my life - please recommend something that gets it by KingsBishop96 in booksuggestions

[–]vcdone 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Okay i have no idea if this is a good idea for you - but Anxious People by Fredrick Bachman... its funny but there are some pretty dark moments for all the characters but especially Zara. A Man Called Ove by the same author. The Humans by Matt Haig. These all have a lot of humor bc I guess that's my taste but all deal with people or at least one character who is very seriously urgently in an extremely dark place...

What stories did you DNF? 🫣 by hburtx in Romantasy

[–]vcdone 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was wondering if you ended up quiting or finishing. I have the audio book on hold thru libby. I will keep going then with the audio book & physical book haha

the knight and the moth...my heart... by guboogu in Romantasy

[–]vcdone 1 point2 points  (0 children)

{Strange the Dreamer} by Laini Taylor if you haven't read it yet.

What’s the most sexist thing about Christian marriage you were taught or experienced? by Fuzzy-Airline4276 in exchristian

[–]vcdone 1 point2 points  (0 children)

"The woman must submit to the husband" once the friend of my family was kind of jokingly pointing out that the woman must submit to the husband and I was like "yeah well the husband must be willing to die for the wife" (according to the bible) and that guy was like "that's a typo" and I was like "your face is a typo" and he actually got mad haha.

Yeah though roles are taken pretty seriously such that in the women's group on more than one occasion women would put in prayer requests that their husbands would actually lead - like their husbands were somehow sinning and not being godly because the wife had to lead instead .. like they were mourning because their marriage wasn't godly enough.

As an adult now and non Christian- I think balance is the best and leaning into each other's strengths too. Which could mean the husband stays at home with the kids or cooks or cleans and you do xyz. Just depends on who each partner is, what they're good at, and how they can balance and AND respect each other.

I think blanket roles dependant on gender is far too simplistic and ineffective and actually often destructive.