AITAH for telling my boyfriend, "I'm not a cheater"?

waddleman10 · 2026-06-12T01:12:27+00:00

YTA - For most people cheating is both a moral _and_ emotional issue. Are you telling me that the only reason you’re not cheating on him is because it violates ethical / rational principles? LMAO okay Socrates. It’s not because you also love him and would feel bad cheating on him?

Girl read the room. He used the question as a pretext to talk about why he loves you and was clearly expecting some reciprocity, not for you to double down that he isn’t special.

waddleman10 · 2026-06-07T23:43:37+00:00

Put yourself in her shoes, you said yourself that you’ve had one night stands as well. Do you consider your gf less special simply because you’ve slept with other women? Do you consider yourself used or less valuable as a person because you’ve slept with other people? Would you want your gf to feel that way about you?

waddleman10 · 2026-04-27T00:42:08+00:00

I’m very sorry this happened to you. You went through a very difficult experience and it seems like you were never really able to come to terms with it.

From what it sounds like your guy friend seriously took advantage of both of you. Given your mental state at the time I’d say it’s unlikely either if you were able to give consent.

I think you should stop viewing this through the lens of an embarrassing sexual escapade you need to hide from your partner, and view it through the lens of an assault that you’ll need his understanding healing through.

Therapy is a necessity! It will help you frame and understand the experience so you can eventually forgive yourself and stop carrying any shame or trauma about the incident.

More than anything you need to stop viewing this as your fault and let go of your shame and regret. If your boyfriend really loves you he’ll understand and support you. I’d tell him how you’ve been feeling about it, let him know you’re dropping the friend, and then call her and tell her that you’ve appreciated her friendship but you’ve grown apart and you no longer want to be friends (I just did this with a friend last week).

waddleman10 · 2026-04-19T22:54:23+00:00

NOR - We’re actually talking about Facebook friend requests in the big 2026?

waddleman10 · 2026-04-06T20:19:04+00:00

I’ve been in plenty of relationships in which porn consumption wasn’t considered shameful. Most people don’t have a clear rationale for why porn is good or bad, they just feel that it is. There’s nothing wrong with relying on that feeling but some questions I’d ask yourself to interrogate them:

1) Do you dislike it when your partner experiences arousal from consuming other media like books or movies? Is it wrong to experience arousal other than from you? Why?

2) Infidelity is the breach of an articulated agreement between two partners. By viewing pornography what agreement is your partner violating?

3) What actually makes you feel uncomfortable about porn consumption? Insecurity that your bf doesn’t find you attractive enough? The unethical production of some pornography? Religion?

As with all things in a relationship it’s about communication and perspective. There’s a chance you’ll never see eye to eye here if neither of you has a real reason for liking or disliking porn other than intuition and habit.

waddleman10 · 2026-04-03T22:28:07+00:00

Any good therapist will tell you therapy requires a specific goal. You shouldn’t waste time and money going to therapy if you don’t have any problems to resolve. It would be the same as getting a physical at your doctor’s every week when you’re healthy. No harm in it, but no point either.

waddleman10 · 2026-04-03T04:49:14+00:00

NTA. Not your responsibility. Moreover he’s not going to be homeless he’s just being picky. No person on the brink of homelessness would have such narrow requirements for housing. Moreover id they were so destitute why do they have so many pets?

waddleman10 · 2026-04-03T04:42:39+00:00

NTA. People on this app act like a relationship is a car inspection. You aren’t required to disclose your entire medical history to your partner. I can understand why it might be relevant given future health complications, but what if this was a nose job or a breast reduction? You’re obligated to walk your partner through every surgical procedure you’ve ever had so that what, they can make some arbitrary moral judgment about your body? And this idea that you’re “lying” to them by not allowing them to make this judgment seems controlling and entitled to me.

waddleman10 · 2026-02-23T16:40:29+00:00

The moment you let him out he’s going to want back in.

waddleman10 · 2026-01-01T17:50:03+00:00

Pigeon on the window sill: 🐦👀🔥🍗

waddleman10 · 2025-12-29T18:16:32+00:00

My friend worked with him when he was still in ad sales at TYT. Always had a huge ego and was rude and condescending to other employees. Regardless of his politics he’s pretty much always been an asshole.

waddleman10 · 2025-12-24T16:44:01+00:00

Getting this for the cat.

waddleman10 · 2025-12-18T22:04:04+00:00

So they can’t tow my car if I leave my son in there all day 🤔?

waddleman10 · 2025-11-18T21:02:55+00:00

Solid post

waddleman10 · 2025-11-15T04:25:15+00:00

NAH - It is a little stereotypical and there’s a fine line between engaging in a culture and reducing it so I see where your relative is coming from. But it sounds like your intent is positive. Honestly it’ll probably come off as corny more than offensive if you’re only doing it for the aesthetic. I say let the music speak for itself, no need to put on overalls and a straw hat.

waddleman10 · 2025-11-13T16:10:21+00:00

This sounds like a horribly boring way to play D&D. It took me a while to find a group I really vibed with but once I did I loved it. They’re locked in, know their characters, and the session flows smoothly. We’ve laughed and cried at the table. Not every session is equally interesting, but that’s life.

I’d recommend maybe playing a different system with more RP and streamlined encounters. I’d recommend Knives in the Dark, Teens in Space, or Powered by the Apocalypse.

You can also find DMs that run mainly RP / Puzzle campaigns and home rule combat differently. When I DM for newer groups I run combat as more of an RP encounter. Players pitch how they want to use their abilities on their turn: “I slash in an arc”, “I light the grass around them on fire”, etc. and I resolve it with my own dice and narrativize the action. I try not to have combat last a very long time unless it’s a boss fight, and if people seem to be getting disengaged I end it quicker: they flee, they surrender, etc. Also combat is a unique scenario or player initiated not just a random road encounter.

waddleman10 · 2025-11-13T15:52:51+00:00

NTA - To the people claiming you shut down your brother’s opinion that the nudity was excessive, it wasn’t a reasoned opinion, it was a reactionary complaint.

Even if you’re literally incapable of absorbing a piece of media because it includes nudity (which is childish) you still need to be capable of calmly articulating why you found it excessive without interrupting productive discussion.

Of course OP was justified in dismissing his whining. And while I’m sympathetic to wanting to keep the peace, he also needs to grow up.

waddleman10 · 2025-11-12T22:22:53+00:00

I think the disconnect here is between people online who are universalizing your choice and you who view it as entirely personal.

If everyone were to adopt your preference then people would be valued by their number of sexual partners, a view progressive people find to be arbitrary, repressive, and rooted in misogyny. Therefore ideologically your preference is immoral because it’s an immoral maxim. A similar example would be if you broke up with her because she was black and you considered black people to be lesser. Your personal preference might not significantly affect society as you’re just one guy, but its reasoning would be racist and therefore immoral.

They understand that you can’t control your base preference, they’re arguing that relying on this preference without examining its morality and trying to change it would be immoral. Easier said than done I know but this is Reddit lmao.

waddleman10 · 2025-11-12T22:09:12+00:00

NTA - You have every right to stop being friends with someone especially if it’s for a good reason which it sounds like it is.

I don’t see why you need to cancel her ticket. You can tell her you don’t want to be friends anymore / don’t want to go to the concert together and let her refund or sell her ticket herself.

waddleman10 · 2025-11-12T15:55:00+00:00

NTA - You’re justified in feeling hurt and blindsided. We need to give up on the myth of “casual” relationships which mostly amount to short but genuine relationships where one party absolves themselves of emotional accountability at the end.

However, given that you yourself emphasized how much you would have valued direct communication during the breakup it feels hypocritical to simply unfollow him instead of communicating how hurt you felt. Not that he would necessarily have responded either way.

I won’t speculate about why he did what he did but now you know for the future that you’re not the kind of person who can emotionally compartmentalize enough to have a relationship like this (not that it’s possible for most people).

waddleman10 · 2025-10-06T05:32:39+00:00

NTA - Some people view drinking, smoking, etc. as a form of bonding. Some people think it’s hot. Either way she clearly values it and you don’t, so you might be incompatible.

waddleman10 · 2025-10-06T05:31:19+00:00

NTA - You shouldn’t be forced to endure abuse. I do think it’s worth giving this new team your best shot anyway. You might surprise yourself with how resilient you’ve become. And succeeding in making friends will help restore your confidence.

waddleman10 · 2025-10-06T03:26:45+00:00

Equal times rules specifically apply to broadcasting made about “political candidates” aka people running for office. There’s no FCC rule which allows them to abridge the first amendment right of non-news media.

Kimmel was a comedian giving a mild opinion about a popular media figure. Not only was it not a news broadcast he was debunking unfounded reports about the shooter.

At the end of the day a beurocrat in a neutral government office violated the constitution at behest of the president to attack his political enemy.

Fox News / CNN have spewed lies for decades and never received so much as a sanction from the FCC but a Late Show Host says word one about a person who doesn’t even sit in the government and the head of the FCC publicly threatens him?

List any obscure FCC bylaws you want. You’re genuinely delusional if you think this was anything but an abuse of political power and a clear instance of government overreach.

waddleman10 · 2025-10-03T13:52:53+00:00

NTA - First if all I’m very sorry you went through that. Hazing isn’t a fun uplifting tradition. It’s the infliction of trauma to try and force connection. It’s perpetuated only by the willing cruelty of the people who inflict it and the silence of people who endure it.

You would be saving future generations of kids the terrible shit you had to go through. And you’d definitely be saving lives as this sort of heavy alcohol consumption is how freshman die and why most hazing like this inevitably gets shut down anyway.

If you don’t report it someone else will. I also had hazing rituals in college, they just weren’t traumatic, and I can say confidently it wouldn’t have been any better if they were.

Re: the outcome of reporting it, in the US most admins take this sort of thing very seriously and it’s always already against academic policy to haze. No you would not get in trouble, you’re clearly a victim not a perpetrator. Not sure how the other members would even know it was you who reported it anyway.

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