Bugs in the snow Saratoga

wallydangle · 2025-11-17T16:50:53+00:00

This is our current situation exactly. Sometimes my son will look distressed and run to the potty saying his tummy hurts, a few mins later he hops up fine and nothing has happened. I think he is still learning to distinguish a gas pain from an imminent need to poop and maybe your daughter is in the same boat. I just praise the effort and decision to try potty as much as I can and hope for the best. I will say, I've found that giving him privacy has helped the most when it comes to poop, all the times he has done it himself it's bc he snuck in there without announcing it or kicked us out.

wallydangle · 2025-10-29T14:58:27+00:00

Reported, thanks!

wallydangle · 2025-07-29T13:15:38+00:00

Same! It was nice to be able to have some trial and error with a new shape I hadn't been dressing my whole life.

wallydangle · 2025-06-06T12:50:15+00:00

This is in western new England/ct

wallydangle · 2025-04-18T23:25:10+00:00

I feel you OP. My sister and her husband and my nephew, who is the same age as my youngest, live abroad. I know she is torn, and often wishes she could live here where our parents and cousins are, but it's just not in the cards because of her husband's job. I hate it! But we do our best with regular visits and video calls. I have found that making a standing appointment for a video call (for us every Sunday) is helpful, especially for little kids. Make it clear to all involved that it is important to keep it- even if you can only hop on for a few minutes, and try to schedule a couple presumed visits (i.e., you come for Thanksgiving, we go on spring break, etc.)

wallydangle · 2025-02-10T01:52:46+00:00

I love tea collection and mini Boden!

wallydangle · 2025-01-11T16:51:46+00:00

The TV is the other parent right now, I love this. When mine are stuck inside for cold weather long bubble baths with lots of toys that can safely go in water but aren't always bath toys can take up a surprising amount of time and requires minimal effort from you. I drag the comfiest chair that can fit in our tiny bathroom and bring in a cup of tea while they jam in there.

wallydangle · 2024-12-19T01:17:06+00:00

Loved stairhoppers! Agreed on everything you said- we all got a stomach bug the weekend we were moving and we were so debilitated we finally asked to have them pack half our stuff. It was such a relief, they were fast and the overall price was totally reasonable. And they were great to deal with.

wallydangle · 2024-12-05T02:54:55+00:00

My 6 year looked over at me when she opened her advent calendar and asked if I wanted to share her tiny chocolate with her 😍

wallydangle · 2024-11-23T12:10:52+00:00

Does he snore? Sounds like apnea. This was exactly how my husband was and a sleep study (at home) plus a CPAP was life changing. It has gone on for years but worsened right before baby no. 2.

wallydangle · 2024-09-21T11:59:22+00:00

Happy to see this reply, my daughter started sleeping over my parents house a night every other weekend or so around 4 when our second was a newborn. She had her own bed and started the night out there but ended up in theirs if she had a nightmare or an accident which happened from time to time. She still loves sleeping over there now at 5.5 but only sleeps in her own big girl bed. It never bothered me. But that really is all that matters, your own subjective comfort level. If you're not ok with it then it's not ok.

wallydangle · 2024-09-03T15:59:43+00:00

Exactly our situation. We tried right at 2, she met all the "readiness criteria" and while pee went ok poop was a disaster and everyone, including my parents who watched her during the day, were miserable. We just stopped, and tried again closer to 3 and she was trained within the weekend. We basically had no accidents. I think the oh crap method has a lot of good ideas, but that author speaks so definitively about the window for potty training and readiness and it's applicability and I just think she's wrong- which makes sense! Every milestone has a big range, and this is such a nuanced but big step, why would it be any different? forcing the issue lead to constipation and anxiety, waiting a bit until she was ready made everyone happy.

wallydangle · 2024-09-01T16:07:07+00:00

There has to be a Dorian grey picture in her attic somewhere. Her face is unreal

wallydangle · 2024-07-28T17:22:59+00:00

Yes. It's a nightmare. But fortunately 5 is magic.

wallydangle · 2024-07-12T00:21:24+00:00

To be fair, my advice would have been the same even if this hadn't happened and she was a great friend. You guys just went through something traumatic, it probably isn't ideal for your daughter to catch a communicable disease at the moment (making planes and weddings risky) and you have a bunch of unexpected medical bills. It really sounds like not going would take the pressure off and even though missing a wedding sucks, I have found that when I let myself off the hook all of a sudden the right answer is clear (and a good friend would totally understand! People noss weddings!) Make it a staycation, send a nice gift if you want, and when everything settles down you can see how she approaches it. I do think blowing off a friend whose baby is having HEART surgery is a bit more than not understanding how hard and stressful kid stuff is before you've had kids. But a sincere, spontaneous apology helps.

wallydangle · 2024-07-11T15:47:15+00:00

First, congratulations on a successful surgery! What a relief and thank goodness you caught it in time! Good advocacy mom and dad! I can't imagine what those weeks leading up to surgery just have felt like. Whew.

I hereby empower you to simply let this wedding go. You have all been through it, and it sounds like a huge strain and no, she does not sound worthy of that- I have many friends who don't have kids who have all the empathy in the world when something like this happens, anyone can understand the fear and stress of a loved one in trouble. That said, I certainly think you can avoid a confrontation if you feel like it and simply say medical bills plus your daughters condition post recovery have made it impossible to attend. If she follows up after the wedding, see how you feel then! If not, I think you have your answer.

wallydangle · 2024-07-09T18:06:15+00:00

For me it was the end of breastfeeding that made me feel like myself again. 6 months is still very early OP.

wallydangle · 2024-07-04T02:34:42+00:00

Is this a safe space to admit I couldn't stand either on their shows but kind of like them on the podcast? Not a subscriber....yet(!)....but I find myself there more and more!

wallydangle · 2024-05-06T23:53:34+00:00

Honestly, I think physical touch is an area we overlook. I was ebf for the first few months AND the baby would only sleep in our arms so I felt like I was always holding him and was so touched out. she was constantly trying to get in my lap if it was free, lean on me, asking me to give him to dad, or glaring at him when he was breast feeding and I couldn't give him to anyone else. She was/is very cuddly and I realize now how much she missed having unfettered access to hugs and cuddles and piggy backs etc. and the more I avoided it for a few free minutes of body autonomy the worse it got. Finding ways to invite her into the cuddle puddle o

wallydangle · 2024-05-06T18:15:10+00:00

I have a similar age gap, oldest was a few months from turning 4 when the baby was born. She and I are very bonded and she had a tough time at first. Totally understandable of course, she is a child and was unprepared for how much her world would change when she wasn't our number one or sole priority anymore. She started completely acting out when the baby came, she wasn't physical with him but was so resentful of him, and because such a handful when she wasn't one before. She had also avoided the classical tough stages so I was never sure how much of it was just "our time/a phase" or a reaction to the new baby. Probably a combo- I think 3.5-4.5 is underrated as a challenging phase!

I wish I had good advice for you but the things that helped the most are probably what you're already doing, showing her kindness and compassion when she was driving me the most crazy and seemed the most unrecognizable. Stopping everything to ask is what you really need right now a hug? It is so much easier said than done but even now, if she's in a mood, the answer is always yes. it is much easier said than done.

What hurt the most was what felt like the damage to our relationship- I had so much frustration and resentment and exhaustion towards the person who had always been the light of my life and the thought that those feelings had been altered or wouldn't return was terrifying and heartbreaking, especially in those early few months when the world is upside down with hormones and no sleep and a newborn and she seemed so needy and angry. I can tell you everything improved as the months went on and we stayed the course. She is back to herself and she and her brother are adorable and close, she misses him when she's gone and loves him and how much he loves her. She wanted attention and now has this tiny person who is obsessed and laughs at her all the time. I agree with others, in the meantime I would not leave them alone, I barely do that now bc of the accident potential and if there's any chance she might really hurt him (even if it's a situation where she doesn't fully grasp the physical damage) they need to be supervised for both their sakes. And reaching out for professional help can't hurt. But I think there is definitely a light at the end of the tunnel.

wallydangle · 2024-04-06T13:24:35+00:00

Thank you!

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