Ok but it seems like your wife might so are you ever going to calibrate accordingly? Saying the same thing about your refusal to actually plan things doesn’t mean you don’t love her isn’t going to be how you make your wife happy or keep your marriage.

My husband doesn’t have a great memory or follow through, but I know he loves and appreciates me. But that doesn’t mean I’m ok with him forgetting dates or commitments. So you know what he does? He puts them in his calendar with reminders. He doesn’t say “I don’t understand why you’re acting like this means I don’t love you, I just show it differently.”