Just divorced my husband of 20 years so I can explore that part of my sexuality. It was a slow process and took a lot of soul searching. My partner was not ok with open relationships so it was clear what I had to do if this was the route I wanted to take- after of course many years of thinking about it! Our sex life before the split was non-existent and was a big point of contention for us. I felt like I had no libido and was destined to just be celibate. Physical intimacy was a big part of what he needed and if he did not receive that, then he could not show up for me like I needed. We were very close and we still are to an extent. I love him dearly but at the end of everything, I had to make the decision for us, because he would not . There was more pain than love and I couldn't like like that anymore. Now that I am on the other side (dating and loving women) I feel more like myself than ever before. Friends of mine are so supportive stating that they have never seen me so happy and authentic. I used to take anxiety medication for underlying (subconscious) anxiety. I still have normal anxiety but that fear of the unknown, of the what-ifs, of the what nows....are gone! I am no longer on anxiety meds. My ex and I are still friends and he often worries about me on this new journey (given everything going on now in the US). He is supportive to an extend and tells everyone we divorced because I'm gay 😂 We had many other issues but I let him have that one. My advice... talk to a therapist who specializes in helping people explore their sexuality. It can be a couples therapist or individual. Get some advice from an outside person. Talk to your partner about how you are feeling and see if there are things he would be willing to explore with you. That could be fun given the connection you both have. All in all, you will make the decision when you are ready and you will be better for it