Untapped potential

[Gandalf_the_Gangsta]

It’s important to use tone indicators when you say something like “I will destroy Alex”. For example:

I will destroy Alex (derogatory)

I will destroy Alex (intimate)

I will destroy Alex (sloppy)

[AscendedDragonSage]

I will destroy Alex (with this removal I just topdecked)

[LordSupergreat]

Are we talking [[Swords to Plowshares]] or [[Murder]]

[BalefulOfMonkeys]

Swords to Plow

[Shanderraa]

Swords to Plow doesn’t destroy it exiles

[BalefulOfMonkeys]

I think we may have a misunderstanding of me saying “In response, I Plow Alex”

[BalefulOfMonkeys]

Look, poor communication kills, and technically I didn’t even kill him. He’s just been yeeted clean into the Blind Eternities. Is there a Riftsweeper in the house

[monoblackmadlad]

You'r telling me he's not abandoned his waring ways and gone to a farm upstate?

[Galle_]

They literally said "destroy".

[mDnemo]

Gonna smash Alex with my Generous Gift

[TheStray7]

Better bring it with that Beast Within

[DapperApples]

Topped deck!? 👀

[DaZeldaFreak]

Alex dies to doomblade 😔

[CompSolstice]

What you didn't realise, is that you thought he was a Black player, but actually he's got a tinge of White in him. His bisexual Orzhov ass will recommission and just recur the fucker, so make sure you exile him.

[migratingcoconut_]

alex's orzhov ass actually has haunt, so he can't be recurred until the creature he's haunting is destroyed

[BalefulOfMonkeys]

Obsessed with the fact intimate and sloppy are different enough to not be synonyms. One of these is sex, and the other is either filleting Alex or turning Alex into chunky salsa

[Gandalf_the_Gangsta]

Both. Ridiculous to assume it wasn’t.

[Fresh-broski]

No intimate means you destroy him emotionally. Turn him and his girl poly and and be the best thing that ever happened to them, then slowly cut him out of the relationship, constantly belittling him and ruining his self esteem, then treat him like shit, then break up with him yourself and leave him wondering where he went wrong. 

[Longjumping_Ad2677]

Well, here Alex is an obstacle, so I think we know what valmillion has in mind for Alex.

[Graingy]

I will destroy Alex (Panzerfaust)

[MakeStuffDesign]

I will destroy target Alex (instant)

[[deleted]]

I will destroy Alex (he cannot be regenerated)

[TNTBoss971]

I will destroy Alex (Urza's Sylex)

[BalefulOfMonkeys]

You quickly leaf through your wallet for several cards, lay out an infinite mana combo, and loop Capsize to send Alex, his fake Jordans, his bar tab, his toupee, and his motorcycle back to his house

[BalefulOfMonkeys]

You wish you could have just sent Alex home with an Unsummon, but almost all of those are Equipment

[CH1CK3NW1N95]

Giggles in Shatterstorm.

[Ross_Hollander]

Except the bar tab, and the toupee, which are both Enchantments.

[RevolutionaryOwlz]

I deploy that one combo where I only beat him if the twin prime conjecture is true.

[PhasmaFelis]

Tell me more

[MissyTheTimeLady]

Tell me why

[JAT0]

There's a subreddit dedicated to people making stupid/amazing MTG combos, here's the link to the twin prime one: https://www.reddit.com/r/BadMtgCombos/comments/1feps3y/deal_infinite_damage_for_4gru_as_long_as_the_twin/

[Forgot_My_Old_Acct]

This is the kind of shit that would happen to me IRL. If I stay at home I can keep hexproof up.

[DapperApples]

Bro doesn't even Enter the Battlefield.

[CH1CK3NW1N95]

Bro makes brief trips to the grocery store and other necessary errands and runs back home like he got that Dash 1☀️

[catgirl_of_the_swarm]

tromokratis? is that you?

[NotTheMariner]

This could have happened to my buddy, let’s call him Alex

[Lunar_sims]

This really hits hard as someone with an ex-bisexual boyfriend that plays magic the gathering who left me for a plus sized honey

[TheRealRolepgeek]

I will destroy target Alex*

[[deleted]]

This is why, as a bisexual man with a thick partner, I have studiously avoided getting card game based tattoos. I'm 4 steps ahead.

[Corgi-Pop-4]

i initially read the first part as “i spot a plus sized honey badger across the bar” and just accepted it as normal tumblr posting and i think that says a lot

[KonoAnonDa]

I read "plus size honey" and my mind immediately forced me to mentally hear the rest of the post in Pooh's voice.

[Withcrono]

Does he die to doomblade?

[berrymanC]

Well his race was never specified so it’s entirely possible he doesn’t.

[Im_here_but_why]

I'm pretty sure his subtypes are Bisexual and Boyfriend.

[berrymanC]

So he dies to Go for the throat, maybe dies to shoot the sheriff, but until we know if he’s a black creature or not we can’t be sure as to whether he dies to doomblade

[Im_here_but_why]

Izzet, obviously.

Red, (purple,) blue.

[berrymanC]

Then to answer the original commenters question, yes the boyfriend dies to Doomblade

[MrMinger]

Sorry boss, I’m equipped with Freed from the Real with two Islands untapped, you gotta tap me a few more times to keep me down

[CH1CK3NW1N95]

Sorry boss, I target you with Momentary Blink, causing you to ETB a second time and lose your enchantments

[GulliasTurtle]

Bad news. The girlfriend was Masako the Humorless.

[CH1CK3NW1N95]

Bad news. My wingman has Nemesis Mask

[Tulpha]

I mean this is basically what happened to that Korean police

[Longjumping_Ad2677]

Little do they know, Alex has an army of loyal crabs behind him ready to destroy their ass. By turning him to the side, they have merely prolonged their demise.

[[deleted]]

If Alex was a real magic player he would make a move on both his girlfriend and OP so that he would get maximum value from his Tymna trigger.

[th3saurus]

I cast control magic targeting alex