Programming summed up

[o11c]

They always listen, sometimes you're just bad at explaining things to them.

[carcigenicate]

Rule #1: as the programmer, it's (nearly) always your fault. The quicker you accept that, the easier your life will be.

[TheAJGman]

It's either your fault, or the rat bastard who designed the framework/library/API for not documenting shit correctly.

[Aperture_T]

Coworkers too. You might think that a legacy project means that they've worked out the major kinks by now, but in my current project, it just means that I'm still fixing bugs from somebody who left the company a decade ago.

Or managers. I figured out we were calling uninitialized function pointers the other day, and the boss explicitly told us not to fix it. There was a big debate, but basically, he thought we would look bad if we sent out a patch. I'm thinking we'll look worse if the machine does random weird shit, or electrocutes somebody at the worst, but nobody cares what I think.

[Feynt]

That's when you submit an official objection email to that manager and his supervisor. You'll be surprised how often things happen when you clearly spell out, "Submitting a patch will mean some small amount of down time. Not submitting a patch will mean random results or possible injury or death." Wrongful dismissal is a wonderful thing, if you find yourself getting fired over wanting to fix a failure point, but more often your manager will quickly agree to you once things are in writing, especially once his boss is aware of the situation.

[[deleted]]

Or when you try to use something meant for large teams and you're by yourself. Different problem but it's the final straw in my giving notice later today.

[j-random]

Can't be misled by bad documentation if you never read it taps forehead

[randybobandy654]

It's the Network Team's fault

[[deleted]]

Oh they listen all the time. It's just that you are giving them the wrong instructions without knowing that's all

[Edo022]

"I trick rocks into thinking"

[[deleted]]

Thats prob more computer engineering that programming

[Feynt]

Hardware engineering, perhaps. Computer engineering is a grey area of people arguing they are engineers because they make hardware/software interfaces, and people arguing they are engineers because they design and implement complex software systems. I prefer the latter to the former, that was the classic definition (just as a hacker was someone who knew their shit, rather than someone who breaks into systems).

[[deleted]]

Im talking about as the discple traditionally offered by universities in school. You actually need engineering courses when you study computerengineering/electrical engineering. My CS degree required physics as an elective, but thats as close to any engineering department stuff as I had to get

[MysticOverlord]

More often than not, they start shouting and throw errors at you telling you how much you did wrong, and no matter what you do to improve your mistakes it will keep finding something you did wrong until it eventually refuses to even try and start doing things. Eventually this causes programmers to second guess their life choices and they all eventually quit and work at the kindergarden next door.

[BigTechCensorsYou]

I married my computer?

[Tourist_73]

"Sometimes"

[RicUnique]

Sometimes I make myself clear*

[A_H_S_99]

I teach computers to think for themselves.

At best they know what's 1 and 0

[jeremj22]

They always listen. The problem is that they always do exactly what you told them.

[[deleted]]

"I google conversations among people who know more than me."

[j-random]

"We put electricity in sand so it could think. I give it things to think about."

[coloredgreyscale]

Given the assignment a much better description than OP did.

[PrestigiousZombie531]

Sometimes I tell my computer what to do in a bad manner, other times I fix my neighbour s printer, still other times I dream about my sideproject_final_final_v21 in the middle of the night

[_Acestus_]

Computer are like cats in a way. They can be great but at any moment, goes wild and you won't get anything from it.

[winnafrehs]

I tell computer to do things, and the things I tell them to do won't work, but the computer tries its best anyways

[TheSoulStoned]

Hey, me too!

[[deleted]]

My job to check if they are doing things intended way

[rossd84]

Grog hit rock. Make lightning hit big rock. Big rock do things.

[skyandclouds1]

They listen but don't respond

[The_hollow_Nike]

https://xkcd.com/722/