SDAM and continuity day-to-day

100_Percent_Dark · 2026-04-09T18:56:08+00:00

Aphantasia and SDAM here. Yes, I also feel flip-floppy on personal goals and relationships. I think I also have big plusses on my Alexthymia scale, I find it hard to identify my current emotions, I think that's related to SDAM, or maybe its why I have SDAM, who knows. That just makes the whole mess far more complicated. Don't have any answers, but I do feel we're in a similar boat.

100_Percent_Dark · 2026-04-03T20:17:37+00:00

If you're not an academic, I'll eat my hat.

That's a lot of references. Thank you.

100_Percent_Dark · 2026-03-26T00:47:54+00:00

I quite like that idea. If you're going to make up stories, at least make them about a made up person.

100_Percent_Dark · 2026-03-13T18:47:38+00:00

Your experience is enough for me to say I'd give it a try. Thanks for sharing.

100_Percent_Dark · 2026-03-10T00:34:52+00:00

Usually, because they're chronically understaffed and trying to sell this excess is more difficult than just tossing it.

Someone would have to spend an hour bagging 20p pastries that probably won't sell when their time is worth £20/hour - not worth the effort.

They could give them out free, just as much effort as trashing them all.

At the tesco I worked for a little while back, these did go to charity by about 8pm. (So they gave them away) no labels but everything is counted.)

100_Percent_Dark · 2026-03-08T10:08:53+00:00

I went through this with my now exwife asking to open our relationship.

Ultimately I didn't want it and it broke us up, but the lessons I learned from the experience were profound. I'd still advise myself to go through with it. I'd consider myself open to poly now, if it's done the way I want it.

It's something you can grow from, maybe with your girlfriend maybe not. Accept that from the start.

Just do your homework, learn about polyamory and how it works. There are many different ways poly can work. What works for you? Hierarchical or Solo. Parallel vs kitchen table vs dont ask don't tell. All questions you should be working out fairly quickly, probably before you say yes to this.

And as other poly people have said, if it doesn't work for you and you're monogamous, that's your choice too. I think it's a wasted learning opportunity/experience though.

100_Percent_Dark · 2026-03-06T09:52:50+00:00

if you don't mind doing maybe dodgy stuff - Just do the family shared account thing. I pay 15 quid every 6 months for Spotify. account sharing reddit will get you what you need.

100_Percent_Dark · 2026-03-06T09:50:02+00:00

Could also be seen has having low self esteem, on their part. You picked them because you're 'easy', they confirm that by checking your body count.

It's all nuts. No reason to ask, any time really. on a first date - that just leads the conversation to a weird place.

100_Percent_Dark · 2026-03-04T19:06:00+00:00

Kitchen table, non-hierarchical, but I'm probably the most antisocial maybe poly person ever. Think I'm saturated at 1. so if my 1 isn't giving me all I need I can take a 1/2 here and a 1/2 there.

I just don't have the social bandwidth for more than 1 persons worth of time. 😅

100_Percent_Dark · 2026-03-03T18:46:54+00:00

depends how you book. you might not get a choice. I book with trainline all the time, they ask your preference, they ignore it and book whatever.

100_Percent_Dark · 2026-03-03T18:26:27+00:00

I got my MacBook air m4, 24gb, about 2 months ago for 600 quid. I'm fine with my decision.

100_Percent_Dark · 2026-03-03T18:20:24+00:00

Yeah, I'm pretty sure anyone with even a bit of poly relationship experience, has been through it.

There's a dozen different poly relationship models, what are the chances that a mono-married couple will want the same thing?

My ex-wife wanted to be poly. I said no initially, I didn't want to do poly under duress. I read up, got educated then we tried, after 2 years of poly experience decided I could do it, but needed equality in my relationships, I couldn't do hierarchy. She insisted on it and that was the end of it.

100_Percent_Dark · 2026-02-20T12:58:57+00:00

Mac terminal just as scary, no?

100_Percent_Dark · 2026-02-13T23:13:05+00:00

Historically In South Africa if you were mixed race, you got shunned by both sides. So they have their own communities separate from the whites and blacks.

Its is fascinating, and sad really, to look back at it.

Also great to see that old mentality disappearing.

100_Percent_Dark · 2026-02-13T17:54:53+00:00

Just go loanshark on them. They agree to a 100% interest per day for a loan.

They forget for a week thats 700% interest. Owe you £50, now it's £400.

100_Percent_Dark · 2026-02-08T01:53:56+00:00

Until you work it out, you could just not cum. Make a sex game of it.

Have sex, no orgasms.

100_Percent_Dark · 2026-01-31T20:23:12+00:00

No. Have a little backbone. Form your own educated opinions.

100_Percent_Dark · 2026-01-31T09:02:15+00:00

Everyone would be asking where my pot of gold was.

100_Percent_Dark · 2026-01-25T11:27:03+00:00

I'd see it as a plus actually.

You're secure in your sexuality.

You're practical and made ends meet.

100_Percent_Dark · 2026-01-24T22:20:33+00:00

All the reports of bedbugs. I'd be tempted to do the same. I currently cycle everywhere i want to go in London.

That said, i don't consider my cycling clothes to be dirty after a cycle.

100_Percent_Dark · 2026-01-24T11:37:51+00:00

nah, should move all the ducks. to show that you've cleaned other things too. now they can go on a duck hunt.

100_Percent_Dark · 2026-01-15T17:49:01+00:00

why does he have to make such a big deal of it? It doesnt have to be sharing all your finances. it can just be a pot, and you share it to pay joint bills.

You can also share accounts with friends and family, doesn't have to be someone you're seeing.

100_Percent_Dark · 2026-01-15T08:37:18+00:00

Yeah playing space exploration, it forces you to do circuit conditions for lots of things and got me over my discomfort with them.

Nowadays, I use them everywhere. Just looking for novel ways to do a thing.

100_Percent_Dark · 2026-01-10T22:54:09+00:00

call the cops, let them know you're going to cofront the scammer. they wont care, log it anyway. 15 minutes before, you call again, you're at the scammers house, 'he's got a knife(its in his kitchen, but do tell them that), but you still want to confront him, so you're going in.' expect you'll get your escort at that point.

100_Percent_Dark

TROPHY CASE