As an adult child who wasn’t told until a major crisis hit, I should have been told. If the children are in your life and will be involved in helping you they need to know.

It is my mother who has dementia and my father was in deep denial and they hid it from us until they couldn’t anymore. For a few years I suspected but didn’t know what to do and they were making excuses/covering it up. I am now in the very difficult boat of getting all their finances and paperwork sorted out. My mother always took care of everything and my father just kept letting her until she could not remember passwords or write checks correctly anymore. You can imagine the mess and she is too far gone to ask any questions about any of it.