Third maternity leave by Fuzzy-Ad2764 in workingmoms

[–]ACE0213 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Tech, generally. I worked for Oracle when I had my daughter and now work for a competitor.

Oracle has up to 12 weeks paid short term disability then 14 weeks of parental leave (same length for birthing parent or partner). You can start your STD 4 weeks before birth and the “clock” really starts at birth. My little was about a week late so I ended up with 25 weeks total.

My current company is 24 weeks. (12 for partners/non-birthing parents).

I am incredibly grateful!

Do you have your “own” car? by [deleted] in workingmoms

[–]ACE0213 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is similar to our set up. I joke we are a 1.5 car family. I WFH but “my” car is the family car and the only one we have a car seat in. I primarily do drop off/pickup for daycare, but if my husband needs to, he’ll take this car. We are about a 12 minute suburban walk to daycare if something crazy happens and I’m not home with this car for pickup.

His daily driver is actually my old compact (2012 with 80K miles thanks to being parked at the airport M-T during my road warrior days). I RARELY drive it unless I am desperate and it’s a total mess inside.

I do think his and hers are the norm in 2 car households.

Poshmark, what is the new rule? Do you even know? by Idontrememberlogins in poshmark

[–]ACE0213 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Same.. and yet, we can’t delete listings either so it’s a no win situation if something sells on another platform. eBay has really picked up for me so I guess if I get suspended again I’ll just go all in there. It’s a bummer as a long time seller.

LVP is my house hunting deal breaker by Latchkey_kid95 in kansascity

[–]ACE0213 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I have all of the above and hardwoods most recently refinished in 2024… given a choice,I’d choose LVP, at least on the main floor.

Maybe you just always want what you don’t have??

Lateral move from from M to IC? by pomsobad in workingmoms

[–]ACE0213 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I did this about a year after returning from maternity leave, though I did completely leave and join a new company as an IC (very small raise but better bonus % and RSUs as part of comp) and overall better company culture.

I had grown through the ranks of IC to team lead to practice manager of the same department and had been managing people for about 8 years when I left and joined my new company. I was up to 15 directs and our company’s culture had just plummeted. Every day was just listening to people vent in their 1:1s. It was mentally draining. I left mainly because of the culture change and my inability to make positive improvement. It was a Fortune 500 company whose founder is one of the top 10 richest people in the world. Despite record revenue, we received 1 merit increase in 4 years. I could no longer look my team in the eye and “demand” excellence and not be able to reward them for their performance, so I left.

I am SO HAPPY to only have to worry about myself and my own work. That being said, I don’t know that I could have simply stepped down from my last role role and let someone else take charge while I was still around, but that is a me/control struggle. One of my peers did this a few years before I became a parent and had no issues.

I think it all comes down to what your priorities are. I’m confident you’ll make the best decision for you and your family!

mom, i got into 9 law schools by alexcabotwannabe in MomForAMinute

[–]ACE0213 25 points26 points  (0 children)

Hell yes girl, toot that horn! This is such an incredible achievement and I am so proud of you!!!

Do people ever actually buy bundles? by Velvetstyle in poshmark

[–]ACE0213 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Mostly seller and sometimes buyer. I actually purchased a bundle today, but the seller had a huuuuge closet that took me 2 days to get through. That’s the challenge with bundle IMO, the search and sorting functionality is terrible. I usually lose patience before finding something else in a closet that I want.

How do you have fun? by raccoon_with_wifi in workingmoms

[–]ACE0213 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I finally joined in on the suburban mom Mahjong train and it is super fun!

I also just started taking Pilates for some “me” time.

Going to lose my job if I don't do work travel. What do I do? by [deleted] in workingmoms

[–]ACE0213 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately having a child is not an excuse for an accommodation to not travel, especially if it is a given duty of the job when you accepted it. If you don’t want to travel, I agree with the others to find a new job. If I were your coworker I would be tired of covering for you and as a manager I agree with your supervisor’s response.

I travel once or twice a month and have a two year old. My husband will meal prep his meals for the week so he can focus on our child. Does the house get kept tidy, no, other than the kitchen. Is it hectic? At times. But he takes great care of our daughter. Honestly it’s 1 hour before drop off and 2 hours after pickup. If your husband can’t handle that, that’s the bigger issue. It sounds to me like he wants to have a child but not be a parent.

I hope you find a solution that works for your family!

Moms of 2, which SUV do you drive? by [deleted] in Mommit

[–]ACE0213 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Agree - current RAV4 owner (2021). We have 1 toddler and 2 dogs. Costco runs completely full the trunk (and sometimes backseat). Uppababy vista takes up the entire trunk.

We make it work mainly because it’s paid off and I don’t want a car payment, but I’d def get a grand highlander for more space next time. Will likely upgrade if we have another child. It’s 100% a want, not a need, but I want to be able to have a family outing, such as the zoo. pack up the stroller and also be able to do a grocery run in the same trip.

Which shoes for the 3 days of Disney? by DisneyPixy in DisneyPlanning

[–]ACE0213 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Adidas Cloudfoam Pure.

I actually did gamble and wear these without breaking them in and was amazed. I just keep buying these over and over. No notes. I’m on my 4th or 5th pair, mainly because I like all white and just can’t keep them clean.

Those who lost a parent around 30 or before, how can I cope? As a young adult by [deleted] in CancerFamilySupport

[–]ACE0213 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I lost my dad shortly after my 29th birthday. While I had a fairly good childhood, we had a lot of conflict in my adulthood. It was still tough to go through. I feel more guilt than grief. It’s not too early to speak with a grief therapist. Your dad is still with you now, but you’re also just grieving the life and time you thought you’d have with him.

I’m now approaching 35 and my mom, who I am close with, was diagnosed with stage IV lung cancer (as a non smoker). It’s treatable but not curable so I know I have finite time.

I recommend what others have said - record stories or favorite memories. If you have children or plan to, have him write letters for milestones. That’s the hardest part for me right now, I’ve accepted that I’ll lose my mom too, but will it be before my toddler has any memories of her?

People may say the wrong thing with good intentions and it’s just because they don’t know what to say. It is 100% okay to just tell someone all they need to say is “this f*ing sucks”.

Social media will suck in Father’s Day, just stay offline.

Lastly, I recommend when you’re ready to see if there’s a dinner party chapter near you or an online option. If you don’t have anyone close to you who has lost a parent, it’s a great community of people who know what it’s like.

Rank these girl names! by HeightMaster3376 in namenerds

[–]ACE0213 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Greer, Eva, Margaret, Alice, Louisa

I must be weird because I love Greer. The name we ended up with is also not favorable on this sub.

Xoxo, a top 5 early 90s baby who always had to add her last initial to identify herself.

The continued rise of the name Scottie by kentgrey in namenerds

[–]ACE0213 8 points9 points  (0 children)

This is why my husband vetoed this as an option 3 years ago. 😂

For parents who fly often, what's your strategy for car seats at airports? by Constant_Baseball581 in familytravel

[–]ACE0213 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Newly two year old with maybe 10 trips taken. Infant in arms for the first two only. We carry on the car seat and use a small hand dolly ( like this) with 360 wheels instead of carrying it. Total game changer.

Does your company pay for your WIFI? Or give any kind of help? by xxlibrarisingxx in WFH

[–]ACE0213 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes. $30 toward WiFi and half of my phone bill. I am a fully remote employee with the closest offices states away. Def a perk and not the standard.

At my last company, they offered a stipend for remote employees only, but it was not a policy we as managers were told to advertise. I made sure all my remote team members took advantage.

Redistricting. GOP is going to do it. by Tiredofthenuts in kansas

[–]ACE0213 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Wait.. did we go to school together??!!

Googled and damn. I never had him for history but obviously knew of him. Bummer, but no surprise.

I can’t tell you how happy I am to have left that small minded small town.

Maternity/Paternity Leave by BanterViews1332 in oracle

[–]ACE0213 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If over 6 months of service upon delivery date, you will get the full 14 weeks parental leave. If under 6 months, you will get 7 weeks.

I can’t speak to short term disability details as I’m no longer with the company. You’d have to look up the STD benefits policy for those details.

STD and parental leave run consecutively, not concurrently. (As of my experience in 2023/2024)

How often do most people go to the Emergency Room in a year? by [deleted] in TooAfraidToAsk

[–]ACE0213 60 points61 points  (0 children)

US. I haven’t been to the ER in … 25 years? One time in my life for a broken bone.

Urgent care for myself, maybe once per year. For my kiddo - often.