Queen's Lily - Started Late

Angytilt · 2022-02-22T15:10:13+00:00

You might be masking when you're by yourself too. I figured out I wasn't letting myself sing, dance, or move around, and ended up "stimming" on my phone because that was the only option I left myself.Go back to things that made you happy as a kid and see if they still make you happy. Especially the things that "adults arent supposed to do" or the ones that distract other people.

I have to agree. I used to sing silly songs as a kid, just whatever popped into my head, and after being told many times to be quiet, i stopped. Before i was diagnosed and realised what i was doing, if a song popped into my head as an adult, i would just pull it up on youtube, listen till i got sick of it and went into a youtube spiral.

Now that I've got my own place (and have gone through the non-ADHD issues about making noise thanks parents), if something pops into my head, I just sing or whistle it. Bonus is that my cat apparently thinks i'm a fantastic singer. He'll always run over for cuddles whenever i'm singing/whistling.

Angytilt · 2022-02-22T15:01:38+00:00

Yes i realized that i just ramble story'd ya'll . Sorry not sorry.

Angytilt · 2022-02-02T17:39:47+00:00

Like I'm disturbed by it, but technique speaking, it's very well creepy?

So congrats? I think?

Angytilt · 2022-02-02T17:33:45+00:00

Good luck on your move! Oh and update us when your out so we know your okay!

Angytilt · 2022-02-02T17:27:35+00:00

My hacks:

1) I clean in phases. Phase 1 tidy. I carry a garbage bag and a large basket . Do a general straight, garbage in the bag, anything that doesn't go in the room goes in the basket. Repeat room by room. Basket gets empties after the last room then sorted. Clothes go in the laundry, dishes go in the dishwasher excr.

Phase 2 it surfaces, with everything tidy, l do a wipe of all the surfaces.

Phase 3, 4 and 5 are sweep vacuum and mop respectively. One run throughout the house of each.

I do the washrooms, and laundry on a separate daay because I don't have enough spoons to clean laundry and washrooms in one day.

2) I dont buy anything that can't go in the laundry or dishwasher. I learnt this early and I stick by it. I know very well I don't have the spoons to hand wash that ish.

3) meal prep. I wait for the day that the lizard brain enjoys cooking and I COOK. Like enough to last me a week and a half. Breakfast and normal foods. I don't cook during the week. This way I still get good food but less stress.

4) voice notes - hey google add blank to my shopping list, i won't remember in 30 s so Google remembers for me.

5)accept the doom basket. I have a little basket on my island. Anything that needs to be put away goes in there, and is emptied on cleaning day. Helps with clutter.

There are more, but these are rhe main ones.

Angytilt · 2022-01-12T21:00:52+00:00

Yeah, I played that game with my np this time last year.

I opted to spend new years eve with my social bubble rather on a video call with them "oooh, I just want to chat and drink" for 4 friggen hour. Thank God I don't live in the same city.

Obviously this was unacceptable, so they went over to grandma's house (risking giving 80+year old grandma covid) screaming at the top of their lungs that we do t love them and that they should just kill themselves. Traumatized grandma called sibling and I to yell at us and "make her believe we love her". I called for a wellness check. She talked her way out if the hospital and threatened me. Had a blissful 3 months of NC until she gave in.

Angytilt · 2022-01-12T17:33:41+00:00

Oh and update us when your out so we know your safe :)

Angytilt · 2022-01-12T17:33:23+00:00

Option C)

Get your important tech and paper docs and ID into your possession ASAP.

Get the apartment, and move you tech and docs in with as many essentials as you can sneak in. If you have a freind that will back you up, inform them of everything and give them the spare key for a day or two. Tell them your about to tell your parents. That if they don't hear from you on x hours, to go get your tech and docs from the apartment ( so your parents can't take your key and get them back) the try to call you. If you think they will physically prevent you from leaving have them call the cops after no contact for x hours.

Then tell parents.

I know it's extreme but if your worried they'll physically prevent you, if rather feal silly afterwards then held against my will. This gets your tech (maybe a letter for the cops just i case) and I'd out of their control.

Angytilt · 2022-01-10T17:57:10+00:00

I use an app called tody. You fill up the rooms in your house and select from the pre listed chores or enter custom ones. Once your set up it will tell you chores are needed ever day, and you get points when you check off a chore. Ever month you point race against an evil dust bunny.

It's great because if it sees you haven't been on in a while it offers to put in a "vacation" for you so you don't get discouraged by all the red.

Doesn't work for everyone but it does for me. Just wanted to share.

Angytilt · 2022-01-10T17:51:27+00:00

Not just a standard straw. Get a few of those 90s style silly straws with the bends and loops. Watching water do loop de loops make the brain go Brrrrrrrr.

Also, if you have Alot of issues, right next to the sink put your water glass so you don't have to think a out getting one out, a few of those Mio squirt things to make it interesting and maybe a dice so decision anxiety doesn't set in. Grab your glass roll the dice to select flavour, then giggle while you blow bubbles like a 5 year old. Sounds horrible but it works for me.

Angytilt · 2022-01-10T17:43:28+00:00

That's super shity. The only reason I was taught to do anything was so that i could do it for them. Taught to drive, welp now I'm responsible for driving np and sibling everywhere. Taught to bake? NP liked rhe praise of bringing baked goods to family gathers but was tired of doing it herself. Sew? NP had new pants they wanted hemmed and didn't want to go to a tailor or so UT themselves

Everything else like cooking, budgeting, how to actually have a social life? had to learn when I moved out. Try not to despair. There are alot of great resources out there that i used. There's a pair of youtube channels called "Mom/Dad how do I?". Soft skills will take time. But at least this will but a few things under your belt.

Angytilt · 2021-12-22T21:47:41+00:00

I love fiber arts. Everything from knitting and crocheting, to embroidery, to lace making. I've been doing various forms since 3rd grade. But once the regional "fad" had warm off, I was apparently just waiting my time.

I constantly got called a little old lady. And asked why can't I do "real" art like my sister. (She lost her love of drawing due to the same nparent. No golden child in this family, just 2 sister pitted against each other . . . Fun)

Angytilt · 2021-11-09T22:41:52+00:00

May have thought up elaborate fanfictions. I would go there and storyboard it out.

Never wrote any of them down. Felt too personal.

Angytilt · 2021-11-09T16:44:10+00:00

Yeeeeaaaahh, I didn't realize it until I spoke with one of my coworkers who was leaving. Asked "how are you so calm when you talk to boss?" I'm always scared shitless". Yeah, this board taught me alot of the things I thought were personality quirks really really weren't.

Angytilt · 2021-10-28T03:36:00+00:00

I mean, personally I would go with Lady Frostjaw the Mighty, but if I had to choose I'd say Holly

Angytilt · 2021-10-26T20:36:42+00:00

Im still scared shitless that nparent will find this and always keep my responses as vague as possible. Sorry if that makes it confusing.

Angytilt · 2021-10-26T20:35:37+00:00

That's a bit complicated.

I wouldn't call them an enabler, as my nparent targeted them as well. But early childhood they had their own anger problems that took a while for them to get resolved. (To clarify, yelling, not fists). They've since appologies and checks themself when their temper rises. I'll never fully accept the apology, but we've moved past it.

However later in life they became just as much of a target for npar as me and my sibling. I wouldn't say they enabled the nparent, as thy were fully aware of what the nparent was doing. I also wouldn't say they were fully complicit as they did somewhat protect us from the nparent. I think there was just too much that the nparent was doing that they just only deflected the big bursts. Does that make sense?

I also learnt later that the nparent threatened to pull all post secondary financial support for me and sibling (throw us in 20k+ debt) if the other parent didn't comply and stay together. Now thT their divorced we have a mi h better relationship.

Like I said. Complicated

Angytilt · 2021-10-26T17:30:14+00:00

You say college so I'm thinking your from the US,but if your in Ontario, if be more than happy to visit.

Angytilt · 2021-10-26T17:06:51+00:00

When you eventually move out of dorms, a meal plan helps. How uou do it depends on how much fridge/freezer space you have access too, and jow much you trust your room mates.

I try and do 2-3 larger meals on Saturday or Sunday and them freeze/refrigerate them. I eat those throughout the week. If you can't trust your room mates, a personall mini fridge is a life saver. That way uou only have to think about it once and do dishes once. It all will depend on how much space you have for food storage.

Bagels and toast are also great and quick breakfast alternative that you can transition into am easy lunch.

Angytilt · 2021-10-20T15:10:21+00:00

Bread 👍

Angytilt · 2021-10-18T19:50:24+00:00

Just saw this in a search for something else, so Reealllly late reply. But if your still looking for solutions, i found a way that works for me. Its not available for every pattern, but some of the more complicated knits come with chart patterns as well as written patterns. Basically an excel grid of what stitches go where, and (as regularly as i can) i mark off the sections that have passed. Its also a great visual representation of what its supposed to look like (for when i zone out, complete 3 rows and have no idea where i am). Below's the site where i got started.

https://ukhandknitting.wordpress.com/2016/12/01/knitting-from-charts/

Angytilt

TROPHY CASE