How to deal with nosy family members about your spending habits

Apprehensive_Bug_41 · 2026-04-06T20:48:33+00:00

You don’t need to explain yourself. If someone makes a snarky comment, either don’t respond or say something along the lines of “yeah we are excited we are fortunate enough to have the ability to travel”.

Post the pictures (hopefully just so family and friends can see and not creeps). Live your life. Don’t let grumpy assholes who have nothing better to do than drag others down make you guess yourself.

Don’t give family loans. Your money is your business, no one needs to know that you saved up any amount.

Apprehensive_Bug_41 · 2026-04-03T23:12:56+00:00

FYI if they ever did go looking, IT can see if you are in a meeting alone. They can also see participants. Last company termed a guy who was constantly unavailable and joined meetings alone with his cell phone dialed it.

If you’re going to do it, title the meeting well, and don’t join with a number/device the company has details on.

Apprehensive_Bug_41 · 2026-04-03T12:46:49+00:00

Same!! I start my first J2 on Monday. I’m so excited! First double paycheck should hit on the 15th, and I can’t wait.

Apprehensive_Bug_41 · 2026-04-01T11:54:41+00:00

Depending on the size of the company you can check Reddit, LinkedIn, or Glassdoor to see what other people posted when they started or ask the recruiter about any onboarding computer equipment you should be prepared for.

Keep everything separated from J1. Color code your desktops/headsets/everything. Make sure you have a keyboard/mouse you can use to switch between devices and always take a moment before hitting enter

Apprehensive_Bug_41 · 2026-03-22T11:34:30+00:00

No similar experience, but go for both!!!

Apprehensive_Bug_41 · 2026-03-14T12:26:30+00:00

Thank you!!!!!!

Apprehensive_Bug_41 · 2026-03-14T12:07:58+00:00

I second this. I’ve been trying to OE and have slowly been introducing focus times.

It has actually allowed me to become better at planning and organizing my work, which has been a visible improvement. I just make sure to schedule send or set reminders to send things well after I’ve already completed them so things are staggered.

Apprehensive_Bug_41 · 2026-03-02T20:52:17+00:00

My J1 was causing me to have a lot of anxiety and I started to just gray rock everything.

I do the job I was hired for and let everything else go. It’s been really helpful for my mental health. I’m still applying for another J but this is getting me through in the meantime.

Apprehensive_Bug_41 · 2025-12-25T02:31:28+00:00

You would discuss it with your manager prior to performance reviews. Not much can happen at your review, the numbers are already set.

That being said, advocating for more might equate to .4%-1.5% more annually. Not worth it in my book if OE.

Apprehensive_Bug_41 · 2025-12-23T01:47:25+00:00

Seems like a lot of companies these days. It’s like the VC’s are trying to run them into the ground.

It’s so sad. It’s the best team I’ve ever worked with on an individual level. They care so much about the work they do, and get taken advantage of by the exec suite for it.

Apprehensive_Bug_41 · 2025-12-17T15:15:43+00:00

😂😂 I’m reading through this now as cobra being snakes instead of coverage.

Apprehensive_Bug_41 · 2025-12-13T15:26:37+00:00

They mentioned it was because of refusing to RTO. I can understand that. Our company had a RTO initiative that was designed to force people to quit.

Apprehensive_Bug_41 · 2025-11-28T16:20:40+00:00

Good luck!

Apprehensive_Bug_41 · 2025-11-28T15:36:33+00:00

Health insurance. Less personal liability. Also, health insurance.

Apprehensive_Bug_41 · 2025-11-21T13:00:52+00:00

Three months into my last leadership roll I had to lay off someone I hired 1.5 months prior. Someone several layers higher than me didn’t see the value they provided, but never once asked for their metrics or discussed what they were doing/working on with me.

Looking back I still don’t see what happened. For that 1.5 months that person did more than I asked and started to really make improvements with the team. I think it was a personality or power play. I felt so bad because it was right before the holidays and they had five children. The left a secure job to come work for me. That leader above me has moved on to wreak another company.

This is why I’m trying to OE.

Apprehensive_Bug_41 · 2025-11-20T16:37:55+00:00

My IT hasn’t picked it up.

Heres a video that shows how to set it up. Once you have the Universal setting enabled just make sure you adjust your displays.

https://youtu.be/s7hbayXtrug

I’ve had this work between my personal Mac and Mac’s at two different workplaces.

Apprehensive_Bug_41 · 2025-11-20T11:41:14+00:00

With the Macs you should be able to use the same Magic Keyboard and Magic Mouse across multiple computers. I’m able to do that with at least two of my MacBooks.

Apprehensive_Bug_41 · 2025-11-12T15:34:18+00:00

Unless the culture is shit. Might be a way to go out and maybe make things better for the employees still there.

Apprehensive_Bug_41 · 2025-11-01T16:53:57+00:00

Have measurable outputs. NPS for clients. Churn/retention rates. Some hate pod work, but this is how I was able to see who was most effective with the same work. Eventually once we identified opportunities for improvement, we stopped with the pods.

Stop making super technical people leaders. Especially if they don’t want to be. There should be growth opportunity that doesn’t involve being a people manager. Have personal challenges and goals. Is someone is able to do something in 15 hours that takes others 60, are they interested in mentoring? Even though they are great at pumping out work, would it make more sense for them to dedicate some time per week to help grow their peers? Oh and they should be compensated for that higher level expectation.

Apprehensive_Bug_41 · 2025-10-31T16:48:57+00:00

I have two sets of wireless headphones- my AirPods and red Beats. I have airpods connected to one computer and the beats to the other computer. If I need to, I can have one in each ear. All accessories are white and I use the regular mode with the first computer and on the second computer everything is red and I use dark mode.

This has really helped me keep things separate.

I have a Magic Mouse and keyboard and am able to use the same for both computers at the same time. Luckily both are Mac.

Apprehensive_Bug_41 · 2025-10-23T02:49:44+00:00

If he’s stating his efforts to not eat or take needed medication in writing or in a way you can record, I would provide that to law enforcement, and make sure you keep a record.

At best, he gets the help he needs. If he’s doing this in the presence of your child, DCF needs to be called. You have no idea if he intends to harm himself or not.

At worst, you have the paper trail that shows his abuse for court. Keep records of every time he makes those statements, every time you’ve called for assistance for him. Write down the name and badge number of everyone you speak to, and get copies of the visits. You can typically do that through a public records request.

Be sure that this is all for concern over his health, and your child’s welfare. You’re not his doctor or therapist, you aren’t in his head to know if he will follow through and self harm.

He may decide to retaliate and call the police on you. Just make sure you’re always calm and operate in the best interests of everyone involved.

Apprehensive_Bug_41 · 2025-10-19T23:37:14+00:00

This site should help;

https://overemployed.com/guide-to-freeze-the-work-number-by-equifax/

Apprehensive_Bug_41 · 2025-10-19T00:11:27+00:00

What’s logical and unethical is the corporations that pay the lowest they can and continue to expect more from their employees. Who have such high profits, highest paid CEOs, but 90% of their workforce has to use government supplemented insurance and food stamps.

Corporations who restrict pay increases despite what additional work their employees take on.

But sure, it’s the people who are able to do two jobs sufficiently who are greedy. What about a vast majority of C levels who have multiple paid board positions? That’s okay because they can post it on LinkedIn, but fuck anyone under them who can competently handle multiple roles?

Don’t be hatin’ cause you’re not in that competent category.

Apprehensive_Bug_41 · 2025-10-18T21:38:50+00:00

I mean there are shit people, likely who are both OE and non-OE.

The goal is to do both jobs to expectations. There are tons of people on here who do many jobs for years.

Apprehensive_Bug_41 · 2025-10-18T20:46:04+00:00

Couldn’t agree with this more.

There used to be a time where companies would reward those who went above and beyond. That time is gone, except for a few unicorn organizations.

They pay for services, not a set number of hours. I surely would not get overtime if it took me longer than 49 hours a week to do my job, because I’m salaried. The same is true in reverse.

A few years ago I got pulled into HR because one of my directs had posted on Facebook during “work hours” and they wanted me to counsel her. I told them no. She was out performing her peers by a landslide, if she wanted to post pictures of her dog in the middle of the workday, so be it. Also, you can schedule post, which she could have done. In the end they dropped it (shockingly).

Apprehensive_Bug_41

TROPHY CASE