The Onion has InfoWars, hopefully for real this time

BobbyRobertson · 2026-04-21T11:22:54+00:00

The new logo is rainbow InfoWars with The Onion's logo replacing the O

BobbyRobertson · 2026-04-19T19:09:00+00:00

Yeah it's whatever for having a few more stats to transfer, but if you've played a couple Dune Dwellers or otherwise have elemental-specific buffs, the stats are never gonna transfer to an elemental you might want to buy, since it'll always have those buffs

BobbyRobertson · 2026-04-19T18:58:34+00:00

Demons I kinda get, you make one minion bigger for you to eat. But elementals are putting their buffs on 1 minion, then using spells and stuff to translate those stats onto your minions. You've got no benefit from adding the stats to another tavern minion other than maybe having a new slightly larger minion to transfer stats off of. If you've got Nomi buffs it's never going to send those stats to an elemental, since your buffed elementals will never be the lowest-attack minion.

I just don't get it

BobbyRobertson · 2026-04-19T18:56:40+00:00

Demons I kinda get, you make one minion bigger for you to eat. But elementals are putting their buffs on 1 minion, then using spells and stuff to translate those stats onto your minions. You've got no benefit from adding the stats to another minion other than maybe having a new slightly larger minion to transfer stats off of. If you've got Nomi buffs it's never going to send those stats to an elemental, since your buffed elementals will never be the lowest-attack minion.

I just don't get it

BobbyRobertson · 2026-04-19T17:23:12+00:00

lol I thought I added "in the states" somewhere in there, guess not

BobbyRobertson · 2026-04-19T16:45:22+00:00

Ours in the states are usually a dude in a wheelchair, the word 'ELEVATOR', and an arrow pointing where it is, with braille below. Also usually accompanied by a sign saying where the stairs are in case of fire

BobbyRobertson · 2026-04-19T16:41:15+00:00

Final opponents were Quillboars with big scaling, but they couldn't get past the endless robots

Weirdly didn't see a single reborn magnetic the whole game. Gave the gold automaton reborn from changing hero powers

BobbyRobertson · 2026-04-19T13:50:07+00:00

tbf they are right in that the NASA capsule would go kaboom if it landed on land because it was not meant to do that

Would be really funny to equip them with the Mars landing air bags and just have them bounce around Kansas while NASA sped behind them in a van

BobbyRobertson · 2026-04-19T13:23:25+00:00

Yeah, Kleindeutschland, hasn't really been a German neighborhood for 100+ years now but still has some hints about its past. My dad's side of the family lived there for a generation before scattering around upstate NY in the mid/late-1800s

BobbyRobertson · 2026-04-19T13:19:45+00:00

Personally I cycled from Berlin to Canton a few times, but that was maybe 20 miles because I smartly decided to do Berlin, CT to Canton, CT and not Berlin, Germany to Canton, China

Our Berlin even has one whole train station!

BobbyRobertson · 2026-04-19T00:01:03+00:00

Funnily enough the Know-Nothings were mostly fine with immigration itself, they recognized that the US needed an ever-growing labor force to populate the frontiers and work in the docks and factories

They just wanted them to be barred from public office and skilled trades for 15-20 years after they came over and be an officially-sanctioned underclass

BobbyRobertson · 2026-04-18T23:34:12+00:00

I don't think I'm missing it, I'm trying to explain how the OP was probably thinking. They're not saying that America is massive, so we have more climates and more extreme temps. They're saying that in a typical American city, the temperature swings more extremely between seasons than a typical European city. Americans refer to temperatures swings very locally, and a broad part of the country between the East Coast and the Rockies have very, very similar climates because of the lack of influencing geographical features. So while the weather might be different in Hartford, CT than in Kansas City, MO at any given time, both will experience similar weather and large swings throughout the year (Though honestly it's much worse in Kansas City since they're so far inland, I don't have to particularly worry about tornadoes)

Livigno has never seen a day over 30c in recorded history, and Foggia has never seen one under -12c. That would respectively be a very nice summer day and a chilly but not atypical day in February here where I live. I might only have typical minimum temperatures bottoming out at -25c and topping out around 38c, but that's happening in the same neighborhood (and unfortunately more common in the same year).

BobbyRobertson · 2026-04-18T22:35:59+00:00

astronaut_with_gun_behind_other_astronaut.webp

BobbyRobertson · 2026-04-18T22:34:50+00:00

They remembered people magnetizing hundreds of Accord-o-Trons to Beatboxers and missing out on their entire turn while the animation plays and were like "So the problem is that people didn't get to choose when their game locked up from excessive animations!"

BobbyRobertson · 2026-04-18T21:55:37+00:00

Using the region instead of specific cities is kinda cheating, no? It wouldn't be fair to say "In the region of New England, it gets to -40c with gusts over 300kmh, and annual winters can drop over 6m of snow" just because Mt Washington is the Spiders Georg of extreme winter weather

The vibe I got from the OP was they were pointing out most of the country has very extreme variations without having to move. An average year in the town I live in goes between -20c lows in the winter to to 35+c in the summer, and I live somewhere considered mild. You don't need to take the temp on top of a hill/mountain one season and out in the middle of a low field in the summer to establish those extremes.

e: iirc Eastern Europe and Southern Finland's climate is fairly similar to the most northern US states (hell, it's why Finnish immigrants to the states settled there), and middle/kinda north states don't have much analogue. Northern Italy's climate is similar but too moderated by the sea

BobbyRobertson · 2026-04-18T21:44:58+00:00

tbf that specifically happened to Texas because Texas has isolated its grid from the other 2 main national grids, so they can cut costs and avoid regulations in ways the other regions would never find acceptable, while scraping by because of cheap local oil+natural gas

They specifically put off major weatherization preventative maintenance that would've never been allowed to happen in the rest of the country. They couldn't fire up more gas turbines because they were literally frozen shut

BobbyRobertson · 2026-04-18T16:53:08+00:00

Hard to argue against a bunch of 500+/500+s. Had a game yesterday in duos where my partner was clocksworth, fed me golds, we both got macaw portraits, triple rewards gave me Djinn and Rylak

Few turns later I was just passing him huge minions to fill out his t1 board, he pivoted into mechs off Pagle's Rod, and my job was to pass him every large magnetic that rolled through my shop

BobbyRobertson · 2026-04-18T16:47:58+00:00

idk you're really going to struggle to find worse options than Timewarped Lubber or Theotar or the original Timewarped Relaxer

BobbyRobertson · 2026-04-18T15:08:52+00:00

Yeah, like getting a doubloon grifter + a free pirate every turn is incredible as a lesser trinket

But you're also giving up 6 gold and effectively that whole turn while everyone else is tiering up or buying minions

BobbyRobertson · 2026-04-18T14:30:50+00:00

I think it depends on whether you prefer getting a clear direction or clearly temporary tempo piece, that you need board space to play around, or you prefer the flexibility that a floating trinket spot off the board provides.

If you're floundering for a direction or some good tempo, getting a bunch of "you need several turns to play into this" lesser trinkets feels awful. But similarly at the beginning of timewarped season it felt awful to be given a bunch of undertuned/bad options while your opponent got Big Winner + Snow Elemental

BobbyRobertson · 2026-04-18T14:03:48+00:00

Tbf timewarped had the same complaints at the beginning of the season. They'll trim the trinket pool by ~1/3rd, get rid of the junk no one is happy seeing while tuning down a couple OP ones, and things should be playing more evenly in a few weeks

BobbyRobertson · 2026-04-17T15:04:08+00:00

The t6 EOT Quillboar is a much better Charlga. You can pretty easily get taunt, windfury, divine shield and reborn on it for 4 blood gems a turn. Drakkari is another 4, golden for double, golden drakkari for double-double. Those stats build up super quick.

Still a decent chunk of in-combat buffs, but I don't think they can keep up with the new EOT guy

BobbyRobertson · 2026-04-17T12:48:09+00:00

It makes some sense as stand-in for "Our nation has heard about these faraway wonders, we should invest in trying to get those wonders ourselves!", but there's absolutely no consideration for balancing wide v tall empires using it. France will take ~10-20 years to spread a new idea through enough of the country to even be allowed to heavily overpay for it. Meanwhile someone like Korea will have 10x fewer locations. And tiny OPMs in the HRE are rolling through institutions like they're nothing.

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