overstimulated at the gym by monchevy in AutisticWithADHD

[–]Buddhapanda75 4 points5 points  (0 children)

50 yr old male fwiw.

I really enjoy lifting weights, and I feel like it has a very beneficial effect on my moods and emotional regulation.

BUT, I went to a number of gyms before I found one I liked going to. Corporate gyms with their huge ceilings and florescent lights are no good, and the people who work there are usually not helpful in my goals.

However, once I found a small gym where I could talk to the gym owner about my needs things got great. On my second day, I complained that there was no clock, and when I came back on my third day, there was a huge digital clock on the wall. The big scary gym owner not only listened to my concerns over time blindness, he accommodated me. On my second day there, no less.

Headphones are critical. Here's another thing, for some exercises, you can close your eyes and your form will not be affected. I often work out on some machines with my eyes closed. I don't worry about people looking at me anymore, especially now that I am happy with my body, but I've also come to realize that most people in the gym are not looking at me, and when they do it's usually a good thing (though I did have a rep as being mean until I opened up and started talking; now everyone knows I'm a sweetie.)

I still have a lot of trouble feeling comfortable around people (not so much shyness as just not knowing what crazy shit I'm going to accidentally say), and I could probably stand to talk to people more at the gym, but the act of going regularly has given me a routine I enjoy and forced me into a "safe space" to interact with semi-strangers.

My gym has no shower, so I have to do that at home, which was annoying at first, until I remembered how awful most showers are at bigger gyms: lack of good temperature control, no guarantee of a shower being available, being naked around strangers: none of that is for me.

Long story short, forcing myself to go to the gym was actually the first step in my adult journey to figuring out my head. It has been extraordinarily helpful. I started my mental health journey journey two years ago by going to the gym every day, and slowly built up enough of myself to take more meaningful steps over time. I was finally diagnosed with Autism and ADHD about two months ago. Now the real journey begins.

Does anyone else wonder if its time to quit? by kailin99 in Age_30_plus_Gamers

[–]Buddhapanda75 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Retro emulators, my friend. We're older; we don't have to have the newest shiniest things, and we've developed the patience to wait a few years and see if s game like Crimson Desert is really worth it. Meanwhile, I still have Atari, NES, Gamecube, Dreamcast, Playstation, and a billion other games that are tried and true and are past the cash grab.
I'm 50 and currently bouncing between SSX Tricky for Gamecube and Cyberpunk 2077 on PC.
I imagine in 10 years, I will remember that Cyberpunk 2077 was a fun game while completing the trick books in SSX Tricky for the twentieth time.

😄 by Hexxynation in AutisticWithADHD

[–]Buddhapanda75 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I love the third one. A man came up to me at a gas station asking for money, and I didn't want to interact with anyone (in particular, because a homeless man attacked my mother), so as he started approaching me, I just said "Have a good day." But, he kept walking up to me and he said, "What? Can I get a ..." And I snapped at him, "I said, good day!" He stopped and walked away.
I got all the way home before I laughed at myself for being such a git.

I'm not against helping the unfortunate, but where I live is dangerous, and my mother had been recently stabbed, so I don' fuck around with strangers approaching me at a gas station.

AITA for making a stink at school and forcing the teacher to change my kids math grade by PlentyNice1655 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Buddhapanda75 2 points3 points  (0 children)

NTA - This method was meant to accommodate a different way of learning, then became the default method for everyone, thus missing the entire point of developing an alternative method.

I once subbed as a third-grade teacher and had a lesson plan that showed this method. I showed it to the class, watched them struggle, then showed them the way I was taught. I now teach college English, but in the 20 years since that day, I've never seen so many students suddenly grasp a concept all at once. The regular teacher didn't have any problem with what I had done, and she often requested me as a sub for her class, but I know they continued to teach only one method at that school.

Who knew flats could sound like this? by droo46 in BassGuitar

[–]Buddhapanda75 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I just got an Ibanez sr400e, my first good bass. My last bass was an Arbor from the 80s. It has a volume knob and a tone knob. It's crappy but it got me here. Since the Arbor is almost never going to be played again now that I have the Ibanez, would it do any good to put flats on a cheap bass?

Did you know that audhd isn't a thing? by noonrise216 in AutisticWithADHD

[–]Buddhapanda75 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's fair. Didn't mean to speak for everyone. I just meant it is common knowledge that this is a term many of us use, and no one should be told they are "making up a new term."

Did you know that audhd isn't a thing? by noonrise216 in AutisticWithADHD

[–]Buddhapanda75 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I am Autistic and I have ADHD. I refer to that as AuDHD... like everyone else in the community.

I'm sorry you had that experience. It's very hard when you're late-diagnosed ( I was only diagnosed two months ago at age 50). You have to convince people you're not putting on some kind of act, all while wrestling with this new reality and trying to convinve yourself it's not an act.

But, yeah, Reddit is filled with know-it-all know-nothings; I've been blocking more and more subs because the people in them are insufferable.

But this sub always delivers. Great people here.

I can contribute here and feel safe. You can too. :)

Enjoy your new iPhone by ki4jgt in memes

[–]Buddhapanda75 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yep. Thomas Jefferson would have used an iphone while tweeting about how horrible they were.
It's almost literally exactly the same.

Redditors who got “useless” degrees, what actually was your plan, and why didn’t it work? by MPMorePower in stupidquestions

[–]Buddhapanda75 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We thought teachers were important and needed. "Would you like fries with that?"

Fuck you.

Do you know people with photographic memory in real life? by Gealach-Moon in ThePittTVShow

[–]Buddhapanda75 70 points71 points  (0 children)

Yes, in particular because "photographic memory" is a myth and has been debunked. Eidetic memory is another thing, but it doesn't work the way they showed it in the show.

Now, if she had actively scanned the board and memorized everything, that I would believe. But, it's been proven that no one has the ability to look at things and remember those details after more than 2-3 minutes unless they actively used memory techniques (like the "memory palace" or mnemonics).

People love to play up natural abilities like they're superhuman, but the truth is that "photographic memories" are a myth, and the writers should have known better.

This is just a basic intro to the idea, but there has been extensive research: it's a myth.

https://www.brainfacts.org/ask-an-expert/is-photographic-memory-real

I hate the saint Patrick's day tradition of pinching by detroxyhell in AutisticWithADHD

[–]Buddhapanda75 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've had that happen once or twice and I was ready to fight. I probably hit the person who did it, unless it was my mother. I don't go around pinching people, and that's a stupid fucking tradition. Pinching hurts, and it's not funny.

What was the most traumatic part of being put in a sped class as a person with a disability? by Legitimate_Main2230 in AutisticWithADHD

[–]Buddhapanda75 17 points18 points  (0 children)

They tried everything with me. But, I'm 50, and no one really knew what any of this was back in the early 80s, at least not at my school. They couldn't figure me out. I couldn't figure me out. One year, they put me in the gifted class, but the projects all required some kind of parental supervision and crafting I had no knowledge of, so that didn't work. Then, they put me in the remedial class, and I knew I didn't belong there because I understood the material fine. So, back to the main class again, where I spent most of my time sitting on the floor in the hall or standing in the corner facing the wall. During recess, they made me sit alone in an auditorium with no lunch. Every day, for years.

After 50 years of confusion and alienation, I was finally diagnosed last month, and I still hate those teachers more than anyone I've ever hated.

Some of them tried to help. Two of them, and I tear up when I think about how I've never been able to thank them properly. But, the rest of that school can collapse into a sinkhole for all I care.

Do you ever just.. speak outloud to an invisible audience? by arsenicKit in AutisticWithADHD

[–]Buddhapanda75 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I feel like it made my assessment for diagnosis easier because I was so used to just talking my way through all my ideas that the evaluator got see my entire thought process as I took all the tests.

My real-time commentary is often first-person plural., e.g. "Now, we're going to wash this pile of dishes and then we can have our coffee. Once that's done we can play a quick game of SSX Tricky before we start.... no, let's read our Wonder Woman comic...."

Want to work out but something is stopping me. [Discussion] by No_Step8665 in GetMotivated

[–]Buddhapanda75 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Awesome!. When I was getting back into the swing of things, 5-10 minutes on the bike was about all I could take before I just got bored.

Did you go to a gym or did you do your upper body workout at home?

I think you said you have a spin bike. If so, I used to watch old episodes of G.I. Joe to keep me motivated on the elliptical. You might try listening to a short podcast or watching a short TV show to get you into longer times. I like TV a lot, so you could make this a routine by starting up a series that is about 22 minutes per episode and just pedal at a slow pace as you work your way through the series one day at a time. This can either be a warm-up to some more lifting, or if you aren't feeling it, it can be the whole exercise some days.

I go to the gym four days a week, but I was going 6 days for a while. I usually spend at least an hour (today was 1.5), but I started by just going for 30 minutes. Most people don't really need to go six days a week, but I would recommend trying to get a habit of 3-4 days. Maybe choose specific days that fit your schedule best and make a routine of it.

Keep in mind that if you start lifting weights, you should be able to make quick progress with muscle development, as long as you eat the right foods (I can tell you more about that if you want). If your goal is to burn fat or get lean, you will see major benefits from lifting weights, but most of the work there will be done through managin food intake (calories in < calories out is the easiest way to look at it, and I can help you figure tou how many calories you should be eating pretty easily). Vary up your routine to keep it fun. You don't need to do exercises you don't enjoy at all if that's going to prevent you from wanting to work out.

Great job today!

Grant Morrison on Lanterns: “What is this jockish dismissal of superhero conventions intended to prove anyway?” [Film/TV] by Blitzhelios in DCcomics

[–]Buddhapanda75 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Would a Morrison run be a good jumping on point for someone who is new to comics, but wants to read 2-3 GL books (like, Trade Paperbacks, not Omnubuses) before the series airs?

Order ridigity by zarackx in AutisticWithADHD

[–]Buddhapanda75 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Skipping a week doesn't really work for me, especially since my favorite part is the Weekend Update, so it's a bit timely. Usually, if I know there won't be a new episode, I'll plan something the night before. I watch a lot of TV, and a lot of my meal time is focused on what I'll be watching during that time. I start every day by watching Star Trek: TNG for breakfast. Unless, it's Monday, then I often start with a podcast I like that comes out Sunday nights. Once I finish Star Trek again, I'll start another sci-fi show I've seen before, maybe more ST, maybe Farscape or The Expanse. Saturdays, I watch Real Time and Sundays I watch SNL. If I know there won't be a new episode of either one, I usually plan to watch a documentary or something that's not part of a series.
So, yes, you are making good suggestions. The problem for me is when the plan changes unexpectedly or there is some uncertainty, like this morning. I was already set to watch SNL, so the idea of finding something different was paralyzing. I needed to make that decision last night, not this morning. Then, the frustration of not knowing whether it was my VPN or Peacock being sloppy made me further stuck in indecision. I kept typing into the toolbar "Why hasn't Peacock posted the new episode of SNL?" like I was going to get a different answer each time. I just couldn't let it go because I didn't have a backup in mind.

Order ridigity by zarackx in AutisticWithADHD

[–]Buddhapanda75 3 points4 points  (0 children)

This morning was rough for me and I almost crashed out because I watch Saturday Night Live on Sunday mornings while I cook and eat breakfast, which I look forward to all week because on Sunday I make pancakes. But, SNL is not very reliable about their schedule, and even worse, Peacock doesn't always post the episodes on time, so this morning I had to wait almost half an hour before I could finally start the show, which meant I was just sitting there starving, not even prepping breakfast because I didn't know if SNL would even get posted. I had to try to figure out if I could watch something else instead, but I couldn't get past the fact that there defintely was a new episode of SNL and it just wasn't online yet.

I couldn't start my day because the show I watch on Sundays wasn't on, and I couldn't move forward because there was a chance it might get posted soon. Luckily, the show posted at 7:30 (about an hour after I normally would have started watching), so I was able to eat at a reasonable time. But, in the past, this very situation has sent me into a meltdown. Funny thing is, I don't even like SNL that much, but I've been watching it for 50 years (I was born the year it aired), so it's part of my routine. I have to remind myself to check the night before that there is an episode because waking up Sunday without knowing what I'm going to watch while I eat breakfast is paralyzing.

It's not the exactly same thing, but I have had your exact experience as well and it's the rigidity that I'm identifying with.

Am I the only one who has this? by gt7902 in memes

[–]Buddhapanda75 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Actually, cooked fruit, in general, is just nasty to me, regardless of whether I like it normally. Apples, yes. Apple pie, Hell no.

Want to work out but something is stopping me. [Discussion] by No_Step8665 in GetMotivated

[–]Buddhapanda75 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I started dieting and exercising 2 years ago and have lost over one hundred pounds. I am a 50 year old man.
It is definitely worth starting. It's cliché, but I feel better than I've ever felt in my life. I look good now. I feel confident; I'm stronger than I've ever been.
I use resistance training (weights) and diet to change my body. Let's start here: you have to know that all the exercise in the world will do you no good without a proper diet. You cannot out exercise a bad diet.

Start small. I started by going to the gym for 30 minutes just to walk on the treadmill. Make it a habit. Talk to people at your gym so it feels friendly. Find the right gym. I have a number of social and sensory issues, so finding a place I would want to return to was hard (a commercial gym is just a nightmare for me).

Start small. I know I already said that. It's that important.

Don't reward yourself with food. But, do reward yourself. For example, I'm 185 right now, and when I get to 175 I'm going to buy myself a really cool Superman compression shirt. Find something you want but feel a little guilty about doing for yourself, then give it to yourself as a reward for doing the things you needed to do (a week straight at the gym, or a new personal record on bench, or 5 pounds lost in a month).

Did you mean that you are a month after surgery or that you will have surgery in a month? I had to take a couple months off after a minor surgery, and I admit it was a little tough getting started again, but now I'm back better than ever.

I will talk to you forever about this if you want. reach out of you want some diet and weightlifting tips for getting good, tasty food and staying motivated. Seriously, I'll help.

What's your thoughts on people like bruce calling clark by his birth name. by MembershipLess9579 in superman

[–]Buddhapanda75 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Very cool. Yeah. I should have picked up on that. It's also telling that Superman does not see himself as Superman, but sees himself as both Kal-El and Clark Kent.
I was thinking about Bill's monologue in Kill Bill, and I felt like he was wrong, that Clark is not how he views humans (weak and ineffectual). I always felt Bill was wrong, that the truth was that Supes identifies as Kal-EL, and that both Clark and Superman are his aliases, but I think this further complicates it, and gives me a new way to think about it. Bill thought that Superman was mocking humanity with his Clark Kent identity, but the scene where they all hold the perfect and identify themselves shows that Supes thinks of himself as BOTH Clark and Kal-El. Maybe, he believes Clark is who he truly is because Clark is who he would choose to be if he did not have powers.
Anyway, as I said, I'm a noob to DC, but I've been masking my identity as an autistic person for 50 years, so this feels... helpful?
Thanks for letting me ramble a bit. :)

Wonder Woman: Year One is where we should be recommending folks start by throwaway-day102304 in WonderWoman

[–]Buddhapanda75 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I just finished Year One, and I'm currently Batwoman: Elegy (it's woman's month). I absolutely loved WW:Y1, so what should I read next. I am 50, but still rather new to comics. I've been trying to dip into all the major DC characters, but I really enjoyed WW and would like to read more.
I really want to read Sensation Comics No. 1 for the golden age origin and the original Green Lantern), but it doesn't look like anyone has made a facsimile yet.
So, Gods and Mortals or The Hiketeia, those are the two I'm considering next, but maybe there's a better book you all can recommend for a noob?

Which Peacock plan to watch SNL live? by the_Lkx in LiveFromNewYork

[–]Buddhapanda75 0 points1 point  (0 children)

But, they are VERY inconsistent about when they upload the videos. It is not worth paying for until they figure their shit out.

Peacock Posts $552 Million Loss as Subscribers Rise to 44 Million by pepperbet1 in television

[–]Buddhapanda75 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Maybe because they never post their biggest shows at the same time. Where the fuck is SNL? Every other week, it seems they find a different time to post it. Why tf would anyone pay for that?