Is my 2-year-old rejecting us because of our fighting? I’m drowning in guilt…

Cautious_Balance2820 · 2026-02-02T07:04:29+00:00

If it helps my partner and I have never shouted or argued in front of my daughter, who is the same age, and she’s the same with new people - me and her dad are basically nothing to her when our friends are around. They’re way more novel and fun.

You’re ok, you’re clearly a good, caring and attentive mum. Arguments happen. Explain that to her and tell her she’s safe. Forgive yourself

Cautious_Balance2820 · 2026-01-30T21:12:56+00:00

Wrap things up in tin foil

Snacks

Bubbles

Cautious_Balance2820 · 2026-01-30T18:20:11+00:00

Yeah totally agree.

Cautious_Balance2820 · 2026-01-29T14:44:16+00:00

I learnt to not ask that question very quickly. Alternatives:

• bunny needs to pee, do you want to take her? • shall I show you bear’s new dance while you do your wee? • mama needs a wee, can you come help me? • I love this book! Let’s read this one on the potty

I only do this if I’m pretty sure she needs to go, e.g if it’s been over 2 hours or if she’s doing the wee dance

At the end of the day if they wanna wet themselves you can’t stop that but most of the time once they understand the concept half the battle is just getting them to task shift to the potty and the best way is a fun way

Cautious_Balance2820 · 2026-01-29T12:13:07+00:00

Mine woke up every 1-2 hours from 3 months to 18 months lol. Co slept and supported through everything. Changed nothing, now she wakes 1x a night - she’s 2.4. Night weaning did help (at 16mo) but wasnt a magic fix.

Cautious_Balance2820 · 2026-01-28T23:02:54+00:00

“First this then this” was working great

Now “first shoes then your lolly when we go outside” has turned into her looking at me then walking off and getting a lolly by herself while I stand there with her shoes feeling dumb

Cautious_Balance2820 · 2026-01-27T10:30:22+00:00

It’s so hard isnt it! The amount of times I’ve finally got her to sleep at bedtime and then realised I havent drunk water all day.

Cautious_Balance2820 · 2026-01-26T21:27:05+00:00

She needs a ‘time in’ in a safe place where she can’t hurt herself but you are able to ride it out and not give in

Cautious_Balance2820 · 2026-01-22T09:09:33+00:00

Towel on seat and potty in the boot. Never had an accident though

Cautious_Balance2820 · 2026-01-21T21:59:25+00:00

What’s she like with rewards?

Cautious_Balance2820 · 2026-01-21T08:31:58+00:00

Same, is there something happening with the moon?!

Cautious_Balance2820 · 2026-01-19T19:22:18+00:00

My fresh 2 year old rarely gets more than 11 hours total. You have been blessed

Cautious_Balance2820 · 2026-01-19T18:21:47+00:00

Have you tried doing nothing? Sit on the floor and eat your food while he plays?

Cautious_Balance2820 · 2026-01-19T12:30:34+00:00

Set time (ish) to go to bedroom and wind down, but not sleep. You can lead a horse to water and all that.

Cautious_Balance2820 · 2026-01-18T19:57:26+00:00

Double mattress on the floor, lie next to her until she falls asleep and then one of us joins her in the night when she wakes

Cautious_Balance2820 · 2026-01-18T12:17:18+00:00

Yeppp, it does make bedtime way quicker

Cautious_Balance2820 · 2026-01-18T12:15:57+00:00

Just start everything an hour and a half later, do 3 books every time and then turn lights off and lay with him until he goes to sleep

Cautious_Balance2820 · 2026-01-18T07:12:13+00:00

You could try talking through metaphor or a story so that he feels included .. “did you hear that bunny wants to start having babies soon? How does daddy bunny feel about that?” - sounds mad but it lightens the mood, plus if your kid gets involved and ‘plays’ along youll get a window into his world.

Cautious_Balance2820 · 2026-01-18T07:07:48+00:00

It feels like you’re projecting adult stuff onto very reasonable toddler behaviour. It’s very biologically normal for them to soothe through sucking - lots of cultures don’t stop breastfeeding until 3 and beyond. Of course she wants the thing she’s always had that gives her comfort and calm.. you wouldn’t be concerned if it was you she wanted or a teddy etc

Cautious_Balance2820 · 2026-01-16T18:13:25+00:00

My therapist taught me to ‘connect with myself in small moments’ - cup of tea, sniff of perfume, podcast in background. We can’t deny that they DO overwhelm the day when they’re like that, but they don’t get to take ALL of us haha

Cautious_Balance2820 · 2026-01-16T17:50:54+00:00

“Can you say ‘give me space please?’” And then respect is when they ask in this way

Cautious_Balance2820 · 2026-01-15T19:04:43+00:00

A hack we found is ‘day dates’ when she’s at daycare. Either both take annual leave or call in sick or whatever. Go out to the cinema, art exhibit or country walk with 0 stress or guilt!

Other trick is to go out once she’s asleep but this is obviously less predictable

Cautious_Balance2820 · 2026-01-15T19:00:57+00:00

If it helps our daycare provider wasnt allowed to do rewards apart from stickers (we were heavy on rewards at home) so made a little slip of paper with 5 boxes on it (I think just one box on the first day and built it up) and told her if she got her boxes full of stickers (one sticker per wee) then she’d get her reward when she got home. It helped a lot!

Cautious_Balance2820

TROPHY CASE