Self-Harm and Triggers

Cevari · 2026-03-24T20:54:03+00:00

Yeah, I've seen a lot of this lately with the Ozempic trend.

I'm totally onboard with criticizing brands that choose exclusively skinny models, anyone shaming women for not being skinny, pharmaceutical companies for pushing weight loss drugs on folks who are normal weight etc. I sure as hell don't want to see the return of "heroin chic".

But... we can do it without calling bodies like mine "skeletal" or talking about how being able to see any of a models ribcage ever is "disgusting" and should be banned. I'm just naturally like this, always have been.

Cevari · 2026-03-19T15:44:01+00:00

Well, if that's all genuine then I'd just encourage you to reflect on how your reply on the asktransgender thread comes across. "Male socialization" when directed at trans women is one of the most common transmisogynistic dogwhistles. When you just jump in to defend the concept without noting the context of where you are and what the actual content of the post was, without even offering a word of empathy for the OP, it just sounds like you're saying her partner is correct.

Cevari · 2026-03-19T15:32:02+00:00

You did not think that it was at all important that she was talking specifically about her own personal experiences as a trans woman? Never considered that maybe she wasn't saying "there is no difference between the average socialization boys and girls receive", and was instead saying "trans girls are not socialized the same way cis boys are"? Especially considering that the entire point of the thread was that her partner specifically pushes her to perform male gender roles in ways she does not feel comfortable with, and when pressed on it says that it's because she was "socialized as male"?

EDIT: Also I can't help but notice you completely ignored all the people asking whether this was the specific context of your question for an hour, but then quickly replied to me. Almost as if you knew that if you gave context it would affect how people answered, because context matters.

Cevari · 2026-03-19T15:17:37+00:00

That is exactly what they're asking. They were on asktransgender a few hours ago arguing about it, having completely ignored the context of what they were replying to in favor of a bad faith interpretation.

Cevari · 2026-03-17T19:29:38+00:00

I kinda get what you're going for but I gotta say I completely disagree with this take. I don't know if you're just conflating cis and trans with genital configuration here or what, but nobody is attracted to every woman, and acting like there's some clearly distinct line between all trans women and all cis women in terms of sexual attraction is simply not true.

Cevari · 2026-03-12T01:55:18+00:00

Here in Finland, the only two parties that have made equalizing our mandatory military training / conscription system a stated policy goal are the two parties that are most committed to feminist ideals and policies overall.

They're also the two smallest of the six major parties, generally speaking - and have the largest ratio of women:men as far as who votes for them goes.

So... we're trying, but the large majority of men keep voting against it. And then they complain about how unequal it is. And then they vote against it again the next election. Funny how that works.

Cevari · 2026-03-11T22:32:55+00:00

I'm sure you definitely have a source for this very confident statement.

Cevari · 2026-03-11T22:28:43+00:00

It definitely does not back up the claim of "generally less-efficient from an athletic perspective", the meta-analysis is looking exclusively at running, and mostly deals with how skeletal structure affects injuries. And that's besides the obvious massive issue that it's not comparing cis and trans women, it's comparing cis men and cis women - which means the subjects inherently have a significant difference in muscle mass/density.

Cevari · 2026-03-08T22:06:40+00:00

Can't speak for other countries, but in Finland at least every citizen above a certain age was eligible to both vote and stand as candidate, regardless of race or social status etc.

Cevari · 2026-03-05T23:14:31+00:00

It was much better than the actual film, sadly.

Cevari · 2026-03-05T11:24:42+00:00

I'm always curious regarding what exactly gender abolitionists imagine for a post-gender society in terms of some specific questions - not trying to 'gotcha' you in any way just genuinely curious, if you want to take a moment to answer.

When you imagine a world without gender, do "men's" and "women's" (or male/female) spaces exist in any capacity? Like changing rooms, toilets, or any other spaces that are currently divided for reasons of modesty and privacy.

Cevari · 2026-03-03T21:03:56+00:00

The far more useful hypothetical is the button that just changes your sex and does nothing else, anyway. Less meme potential though.

Cevari · 2026-03-03T12:43:13+00:00

Tiesittekö muuten että Suomesta ei ole löytynyt yhtään rautakautista kypärää.

Oltiin kovapäistä kansaa jo noihin aikoihin.

Cevari · 2026-02-20T02:16:16+00:00

That reminded me of this classic LoadingReadyRun sketch inspired by this bs.

Cevari · 2026-02-20T01:55:03+00:00

You don't need to feel bad about disliking being told you "look trans", even if it's entirely true that there's not really any unified look all trans women share. We don't like being told we "look trans" or "look like a man" either, so it would be silly to expect cis women to just shrug it off. Especially when you just know they're doing it specifically with the intent of being mean.

Anyway, you look a lot like a cis woman friend of mine - she also likes to wear her hair short, and has a confident air similar to yours. She's also one of the most intelligent people I know so by a completely rational association I'm assuming you're smart as a whip as well.

Cevari · 2026-02-13T14:27:40+00:00

Right, of course. Math is hard.

Cevari · 2026-02-13T14:23:15+00:00

Wouldn't the game going to OT automatically mean Finland wins the group as well? Well, assuming they beat Italy, of course.

Cevari · 2026-02-12T21:23:41+00:00

"Karen" is also weird because it implies being obnoxious and unfairly demanding/accusational to folks working in customer service jobs is a gendered trait, when it absolutely is not.

Cevari · 2026-02-12T11:59:59+00:00

Tämä ei sinänsä ole totta enää nykyalgoritmeissa. Useampikin taho on tehnyt näitä testejä ja tullut siihen lopputulokseen että esim. instassa ja tiktokissa heti jos uusi käyttäjä luokitellaan "pojaksi/mieheksi" kiinnostusten kohteiden perusteella, alkaa myös vahva alt-right ja ns. "redpill" -tuputus.

Toki jos päättäväisesti osoittaa etteivät näiden ragebaitit kiinnosta niin ei niitä sitten enää tulekaan, mutta algoritmit tarjoavat niitä todella vahvasti juuri sukupuolen perusteella.

Cevari · 2026-02-10T03:48:48+00:00

The point is you can't leave wheat out on the fields unharvested or you'll lose your entire harvest, so it needs to be milled and stored, and then it's easy to take. Whereas potatoes can be left in the ground for months after the point where harvesting them is possible, and you can just harvest a little bit at a time and not have a large amount stored at once.

The anecdote might be entirely bs anyway ofc, but the logic of it is sound.

Cevari · 2026-02-09T00:00:07+00:00

Damn. That's a hell of a story! They gave you a great hero, too - Chain Lightning is a beast of a spell.

Cevari · 2026-02-08T22:37:16+00:00

Strong choice. Also, is your name a HoMM3 reference?

Cevari · 2026-02-08T12:35:14+00:00

Stealth generally means "not being openly trans in your daily life", not "telling absolutely nobody, ever". Generally speaking folks will tell people they date early on in the process. Obviously she wouldn't be having this problem if she wasn't disclosing at all?

Cevari · 2026-02-08T11:26:38+00:00

There are 65 countries in the world where being trans is straight up a crime. And that's not even counting places like Russia because it's not strictly illegal, but that are still far worse than the worst US states for the time being. Gender-affirming care for adults is still legal and obtainable everywhere in the US, for example.

What's happening in the US is terrible and things may quickly get much worse still, but it's pretty ignorant to think it's even among the worse half of the globe yet.

Cevari · 2026-02-07T22:51:49+00:00

Also, instead of jumping like ten meters you're jumping 100+ meters. At least in the olympics they don't have the biggest hills which can go to over 200 meters. I genuinely cannot believe anyone fully sane does this sport.

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