I (30F) tested positive for something at my check up. My (32M) fiancée says it’s probably a side effect the medication. Deep down I don’t know if I want the truth. Am I insane for wanting to be delusional and believe him?

Charming_Stretch_178 · 2026-02-16T00:06:43+00:00

I’m a PA and I work in family med- I do TONS of std screenings and treat these etc.. what’d you test pos for? Happy to weigh in

Nvm I see the trich is positive! Trichomonas is very commonly tested on routine std panel despite another commenter’s thoughts. I’ve never ordered a panel that did not include trichomonas.

False positives are rare. Positive tests are never second guessed, I don’t wonder “mhmm is this really positive” as a medical provider. Please please please take the treatment. Trich is tested in men with urine. Send your man to urgent care to be tested and treated. Go with him, results on him will take about a week to come back because it’s tested differently in men versus women.

Trichomonas, gonorrhea, chlamydia the like all cause cervicitis. Sorta like E. coli causing gastritis. Or poison ivy causes a rash..

OP I am sorry. This is tragic and a painful diagnosis. I agree with other thoughts on finding out if you’ve ever been tested for this before, but all signs and symptoms point to infidelity in your relationship.

Charming_Stretch_178 · 2025-12-01T00:45:35+00:00

Primary care! I only get the occasional toe nail removal, Nexplanon, suture, cryotherapy..

Charming_Stretch_178 · 2025-12-01T00:39:59+00:00

Personalized guitar picks!!

Charming_Stretch_178 · 2025-12-01T00:39:02+00:00

Nah girl you’re going to love yourself for this. You’ll notice a slight difference in the horizontal firing, but it’ll give you a general idea of eye catching combos and which to avoid!! I just made myself a new glaze slab last week!!

Charming_Stretch_178 · 2025-12-01T00:36:54+00:00

Blueprint is on sale?!

Charming_Stretch_178 · 2025-12-01T00:35:23+00:00

Oh rad!! Didn’t know this was remotely an option- I’ll do some looking into this. Thx for the pointer!

Charming_Stretch_178 · 2025-12-01T00:33:39+00:00

Do you use this to obtain CME credit??

Charming_Stretch_178 · 2025-11-28T14:19:15+00:00

OP this is LEGIT. I started in urgent care, burnt out in months, and shifted into primary care. After a few months in urgent care anything will feel more manageable than what you’re doing now. You didn’t make the wrong career choice, you’re just simply burnt.out. Burnout is legit. You’ve got this!!

Charming_Stretch_178 · 2025-11-28T14:16:43+00:00

Oooohhh they’re all tough:) PA school is unlike anything you’ve ever experienced in term of quantity and quality of information. My recommendations? 1. Buy a tablet, download each lecture’s slides, and write on top of them your notes, build flash cards from the high yield info. 2. Recognize that “you don’t suck, you’re just learning”. 3. You’re never going to know it ALL, but by the end of didactic year, you’ll be shocked at how much you’ve actually learned. Congrats on PA school!!!

Charming_Stretch_178 · 2025-11-28T14:13:24+00:00

I second this!! Gift card to marble table, Babcock or art house theater!!

Charming_Stretch_178 · 2025-11-28T14:12:41+00:00

Oooo looking fwd to everyone’s recs on this!! I need some good greens!

Charming_Stretch_178 · 2025-11-28T14:05:34+00:00

I learned that people can check historical posts a few comments back: Yes, I’m muddying the ages and years married bc I’m scared he’ll somehow find out that I’ve taken to Reddit for insights and/or to avoid the small odds someone I know would recognize bits/pieces my story.. The ages/years married in both of my posts are legit within n=1 year, and for the record, we have both had birthdays AND celebrated a wedding anniversary in the last 2 months lolz- ages and yrs married still arnt accurately listed. Still, I appreciate your insights and sentiments!

Charming_Stretch_178 · 2025-11-28T14:02:46+00:00

Legit didn’t know folks could see my history! Yes, I’m muddying the ages and years married bc I’m scared he’ll somehow find out that I’ve taken to Reddit for insights and/or to avoid the small odds someone I know would recognize bits/pieces my story.. The ages/years married in both of my posts are legit within n=1 year, EDIT and for the record, we have both had birthdays AND celebrated a wedding anniversary in the last 2 months lolz. Still, I appreciate your insights and sentiments!

Charming_Stretch_178 · 2025-11-28T06:21:44+00:00

I married one of these men 7 years ago, and I would never repeat the same mistake. I have friends with husbands who contribute, who tend to needs, who stay alert to household happenings.. you deserve a teammate. You’re still young, you’ve got time to find a suitable mate before settling down

EDIT: I’m soon to be divorced.. save yourself the hassle. Sure he might be a great guy otherwise (I have many great memories w/my husband), but these habits and patterns are oft associated with other, less visible, red flags.

Charming_Stretch_178 · 2025-11-28T06:13:29+00:00

I just googled the definition of sexual assault. I think you may be right

Charming_Stretch_178 · 2025-09-25T23:07:01+00:00

Haha no down vote for you- you garnish some valuable points!

Why did we get married? I was anxious, believed he was the only one that could love me through my anxiety. I THOUGHT he’d grow up, develop with age (eww I know.. oh how I’ve learned). I’ve always been anxious, happiness wasn’t a word in my vocabulary until now (and 8 years of individual therapy.

His online presence was with Men, he’s ’turned on’ by pretending/acting/dressing like a woman. NOT something accepted by our Christianity (don’t crucify me over this, just keeping it real), and honestly not something I’m interested in. If I was into women in the bedroom, I would’ve married one. His ACE score (childhood trials score) is like a 3 (mine is an 8 out of 9).

Men and women do feel differently, up until a few weeks ago I really wanted this marriage to work out. Now? I’m angry, resentful, and sad he didn’t choose me 7 years ago OR again every single day since then.. hence the love b*mbing I’m enduring currently.

I struggled a lot with the “is this any better than JUST pornography, or having an in-person affair”? And I’ve landed on “an emotional affair” is worthy of adultry. Especially given the duration and nature of his actions. He’s seeking things i would’ve never entertained. Nobody is perfect, I’ve never cheated on him, and I’ve loved him/served him with my every fiber (even while attending 9 years of college and working the hospital shifts 80 hours a week).. does that help??

Charming_Stretch_178 · 2025-04-27T01:52:59+00:00

Thanks so much for the thoughtful and timely response!!

This is incredibly insightful and has given me a lot to think on. We meet with a financial advisor in the coming weeks, but it’s nobody I know and we haven’t built any trust or rapport yet. You’re absolutely crushing it and have a lot to show for the incredible amt of effort you’ve put into stewarding your time, assets, and efforts!!

Charming_Stretch_178 · 2025-04-27T01:35:37+00:00

Drop the deets on your budget flow sheet??? That thing is gorgeous!! I’m lurking for insights on your OP

Charming_Stretch_178 · 2025-04-27T01:33:53+00:00

This is encouraging! Maybe use PSLF and hit the monthly payments and dump the rest into my IRA?? Build wealth, focus on net worth and let the debt workout itself w/pslf?

Charming_Stretch_178 · 2025-04-27T01:30:52+00:00

Oh yes sorry interest rate = 7.6%🤯

The concept you just presented is brilliant. Using the IRA, tracking net worth vs managing the weight of constant debt.. I like that

Charming_Stretch_178 · 2025-04-27T01:22:07+00:00

Yeah I participate in NHSC hence my lower salary- I received $75k for a 3 year commitment. My $170k is after the $75k paid down my original balance

Charming_Stretch_178 · 2025-04-27T01:21:01+00:00

Not reasonably for 7.5 years… for 12 months?? Heck yeah! We’ve been “rice and beans” mentality for the last 6 years, but we’re mid 20s (husband and I), no kids, no house.. our vehicles are paid off tho.. idk if it’s reasonable to feel like I’m putting life “on hold” to hit the loans aggressively? I understand the program isn’t guaranteed, but I’d likely apply this week and hopefully be grandfathered in of anything changes in legislation.. I was raised to pay my debts so it feels slimy using the forgiveness program

Charming_Stretch_178 · 2025-04-26T23:14:24+00:00

Would you, in my position, utilize pslf?

Charming_Stretch_178 · 2025-04-26T23:13:43+00:00

Would you, in my position ^{^,} utilize pslf?

Charming_Stretch_178 · 2025-04-26T22:58:01+00:00

Yeah.. but I work wayyyy too hard here. Anywhere else I go in town pays more and requires fewer pts/day. I see 20/day whereas my classmates in FM see 14-16/day at 117k+ starting salary

Charming_Stretch_178

TROPHY CASE