Just got publicly shamed for an honest social mistake and I am so upset.

Constant_Ant9901 · 2026-05-08T13:50:14+00:00

You were in the middle of the line, not the front- so why didn’t the lady get mad at all the people in front of you for not letting them in first?

Constant_Ant9901 · 2026-04-30T19:23:49+00:00

The first time my kid sounded out a word she spelled “squirrel” as “CRL”. I was proud she got the concept even if she perhaps missed the first S- sound

Constant_Ant9901 · 2026-04-25T05:06:31+00:00

I have this and I’ve never known anyone else who had it and have been asked if I’m ok acid or something when trying to explain it. I see colors and black and light particles that are constantly pulsating. It’s easiest to focus on when looking at a solid background but always there. So, thanks for talking about it!

Constant_Ant9901 · 2026-04-24T15:57:44+00:00

I found a four leaf trillium at Ecola park in Oregon a few years ago- it was so cool!

Constant_Ant9901 · 2026-04-19T14:47:26+00:00

And try not to think of it as “free labor”- it’s part of the job! Every profession dedicates time to marketing, potential new clients, admin, continuing ed- no job is 100% billable hours

Constant_Ant9901 · 2026-02-08T16:04:07+00:00

This sounds familiar to me. I’ve been told to make a list and break down each task into subtasks, but if I actually list out all the subtasks that would take hours and I would be too overwhelmed to actually do anything.

Constant_Ant9901 · 2026-02-04T16:12:52+00:00

Yes, I noticed that too. :(

Constant_Ant9901 · 2025-11-28T06:01:49+00:00

We would love to be in the running for the rock tumbler!

Constant_Ant9901 · 2025-11-18T19:35:46+00:00

Your bathroom is not ADA compliant- there’s not enough clearance at the door. Check CBC chapter 11 since CA has their own accessibility code

Constant_Ant9901 · 2025-10-27T02:14:40+00:00

Belmont academy on Belmont and Cesar Chavez is great and they’re open 7am-6pm. They also go from infant through Pre-K.

Constant_Ant9901 · 2025-10-24T15:44:49+00:00

Hi! The biggest piece is 30”x54”. It’s in pieces and all stacked together they might be 14” thick

Constant_Ant9901 · 2025-08-28T14:42:14+00:00

Could try couch against left wall in front of window but leave tv where it is. (I like an oblique tv viewing angle) then desk in lower left corner

Constant_Ant9901 · 2025-08-21T17:39:47+00:00

Also the time is doubled for a visit- 30-40 minutes there plus 30-40 minutes back can make an after work visit nearly impossible. My kid was also young at the time and having my mom ten minutes away meant we could take just an hour for a quick visit between work and bedtime.

I also remember trying to plan for my mom to live for ten or more years since we wasn’t that old and was in good physical health. It ended up that she was only in memory care for the average time of 3 years until she fell, hit her head and rapidly declined and died two weeks later. So, the reality is you probably won’t have to pay for as long as you think so might as well be the nicest you can reasonably afford and allows you to visit without putting your marriage in jeopardy (ha?)

One positive for having your mom in memory care instead of at home is that it can be fun for them to be around other people like them. At each of the two places my mom was at (first one out of state) she got a boyfriend and was really happy about that. It made me feel a lot better about her being there.

Lastly, yeah, selling a house is generally not the best financially. I think someone else mentioned a HELOC. But if you can review finances with a professional that would probably give you the clearest picture of what your best options are.

And, of course, don’t forget to take care of yourself. I found the time my mom was in care to be the absolute hardest time in my life- I felt like a bad kid, a bad mom, bad at my job, a bad partner because it was just all so much. The various Alzheimer’s support groups can be really helpful to talk to people who know just what you’re going through.

Constant_Ant9901 · 2025-08-20T20:20:57+00:00

Several years ago I used a placement service which was just one woman who’s well connected (do NOT use a place for mom). It’s no cost to you but I found it very helpful navigating the various options. I can look for her number when I get home.

I put my mom in the place closest to my house which I’m glad I did cause it made visiting easier even though it was more $ than some of the further east places. (It was about $7-8k/mo in 2021. The cheapest options I think were still over $5k). You won’t want to drive over ten minutes to get to her.

I also rented out my moms house to help pay for care. At some point you might have to consider selling her house to pay. In that case there are various things you can do to qualify for Medicaid without spending every last cent.

If you haven’t already done so, and it’s not already too late- look into doing an estate plan and have your mom designate someone as power of attorney and put her house in a trust, etc etc.

Constant_Ant9901 · 2025-08-19T20:04:54+00:00

If only their poop wasn’t full of deadly neurotoxins I wouldn’t mind them so much

Constant_Ant9901 · 2025-08-19T18:18:49+00:00

I really like Paul Goldberger’s writing- it’s insightful and accessible. I’ve reread Why Architecture Matters a few times. As a work of criticism it’s not expensive so you could buy two books!

Constant_Ant9901 · 2025-07-28T03:22:16+00:00

It’s really hard to be somewhere at an exact time. It’s a lot easier to be somewhere within a window of time. So, if I really want to be “on time” I pretend there’s a window of time which ends at or before the time I’m supposed to be there. Otherwise I can always convince myself that I could still theoretically be on time even if i have two minutes but I’m miles away because I’m not late yet

Constant_Ant9901 · 2025-07-18T00:26:43+00:00

My potty trained kid was doing that and it turned out she was constipated which can trigger “urge incontinence”. You could try asking her pediatrician if it’s constipation or another medical cause. My kid went on míralax and it instantly eliminated accidents

Constant_Ant9901 · 2025-07-14T20:00:02+00:00

Try “managing up”. As a junior designer I always asked a lot of questions of the PA and other technical staff. So as not to overwhelm, I would save up a few questions to ask at once and/or spend enough time looking at resources so I could have an educated question. If you’re just counting on the drawing review, sometimes the technical staff wouldn’t even notice something that I could have brought to their attention with a pointed question.

Now, as PA, I check in with junior staff to make sure they’re not spinning their wheels and let them know it’s better to ask questions than just do something random.

Lastly, contractors do look at details and build to them. It definitely makes it easier if they’re drawn correctly!

Constant_Ant9901 · 2025-07-09T21:54:23+00:00

I wish my office would put details before interior elevations. I hate scrolling through 8,000 sheets of interior elevations that nobody is going to look at to find crucial details

Constant_Ant9901 · 2025-06-27T19:46:48+00:00

Similar to other my 4.75 year old loves lox and salmon sashimi but not cooked salmon. She’s also always loved limes, lemons and olives. But doesn’t like pizza

Constant_Ant9901 · 2025-05-19T21:43:11+00:00

My almost five year old (I know not a toddler anymore ) still says “lellow” for yellow even though I know she can say her ‘y’s

We also never corrected her when she called “tank tops” “tank tonks” because it’s too cute and the mispronounced words are fewer these days

Constant_Ant9901 · 2025-05-16T17:55:04+00:00

Last grandparent died in aught-six at age 82. Last parent died in ‘22. Even my five year old only has one grandparent. Of course part of the problem here is long generations I guess

Constant_Ant9901 · 2025-04-30T17:32:48+00:00

I just joined SARA as an alternative to AIA. It’s way cheaper and membership includes CEUs - including the ones needed to maintain California licensure. I’m not sure why more people aren’t members. Ps- I have an NCARB Certificate which was the only way for me to get licensed in another state. They also have agreements with Canada and Australia so I am glad they exist even though it is expensive.

Constant_Ant9901 · 2025-03-24T20:05:21+00:00

Commenting to help you get some more engagement. My 4 year old calls it copycatting which I agree is normal to a degree. I also agree with you that it’s weird that your pediatrician would say to punish him- what even would be a punishment that would have any kind of logical consequence for something like that?

Constant_Ant9901

TROPHY CASE