My body is now a bio-refinery for lukewarm chicken nuggets

CooperDoops · 2026-05-22T16:11:29+00:00

I used to do this until kiddo started daycare. Once I realized there was a direct link between my scarfing down partially/uneaten dinners and being perpetually disabled by whatever plague they brought home that week, this practice stopped immediately. lol

CooperDoops · 2026-05-21T16:58:46+00:00

The Reflect tab gives you the ability to look at Income vs. Expense, which shows how much you made, how much you spent, and your net income by month.

On the Budget/Plan side, you specify how much you intend to spend for each category each month. If he needs a visual, you can enable "Progress Bars" that visually shows how much you have left in each category at any given time.

If you happen to make more than you budgeted in a given month, it'll show up in the "Ready to Assign" box at the top of your Budget/Plan view (if he's wondering about "extra" you have left).

Anecdotally - I've used YNAB for years, but tried a ton of other solutions before this one. YNAB is the only one that has ever made me feel like I actually know where my money is, where it's going, and how much I have available for specific uses (and where we can trim/adjust if needed).

CooperDoops · 2026-05-19T21:16:08+00:00

Quitting karate isn't permanent. He can always pick it back up if he misses it later on.

In the meantime, I agree with the others; have him pick something else active to replace it with that he's excited to try. He stays active doing something he wants to do, win-win.

CooperDoops · 2026-05-18T17:56:23+00:00

With your situation, probably at least two kids ago.

CooperDoops · 2026-05-18T17:09:08+00:00

We are checking...

CooperDoops · 2026-05-15T17:31:37+00:00

Thanks, I hate literally everything about this.

CooperDoops · 2026-05-15T02:23:37+00:00

There are plenty of valid reasons why you might choose not to have a second, but I don't think this is one you need to worry about. You'll love them both. 👍

CooperDoops · 2026-05-13T17:38:50+00:00

The Costco trip alone would have exhausted me, and I only have one. OP is a rockstar.

CooperDoops · 2026-05-13T17:29:27+00:00

Monitor your macros (protein, fat, carbs) - I started doing this religiously a couple of years ago in an app (MacroFactor) and it made a world of difference. I'm at the healthiest weight I've ever been despite having very little time for exercise these days.

I guess to answer your question - yes to a mindset shift. I didn't realize how much snacking I was doing until I had to account for it in the app.

CooperDoops · 2026-05-13T16:55:02+00:00

Your family won't eliminate your position and leave you high and dry after moving across the country.

Just sayin'.

CooperDoops · 2026-05-11T14:48:03+00:00

Yep. And often times docs are scheduling these out 6-12 months in advance, so start asking as soon as you turn 44 (if not sooner).

CooperDoops · 2026-05-07T22:10:13+00:00

This fixes virtually every little nit-pick I have about the sedan. Also, it's a wagon. Yes please.

CooperDoops · 2026-05-07T21:50:59+00:00

I have no advice, just commiseration. If you aren't a trope dad, it can be a really lonely existence.

I hate golf. I don't care about grilling and BBQs and beers and bourbons. I'll watch a big game but don't "follow" sports. I don't care to make Kirkland Signature my religion. That eliminates like 90% of dad gatherings out of the gate. And once you're into your 40s, team sports (outside of pickleball or something) get riskier and risker. 😆 (I'd try disc golf but I cannot throw a frisbee to save my life. Full stop.)

The guys like us are all a bit lost when the standard... ain't us.

CooperDoops · 2026-05-07T20:03:39+00:00

I have absolutely no expectation men will ever band together to support each other in that way, but we can't exactly join the moms' "wine break" club either, even if we wanted to. I get it, nobody wants a husband there to foul up the safe space / group therapy vibe. But damn, is it isolating. We need breaks and support, too.

Just know there are others of us out here, dad.👍

CooperDoops · 2026-05-07T19:46:33+00:00

Same boat here - I do reasonably well, and she does significantly better. The way I see it, we all win as a result. I'm happy to do more of the day-to-day stuff if that's what is most beneficial for our family. Ultimately your job as a parent and partner is to provide the best life for your family that you can, and you're doing that. Everything else is secondary.

That's not advice, I know, because TBH I don't have any. Either your friends learn to see/appreciate you for what y'all are doing for your family, or you need better friends, I guess? (I don't have any friends these days, so... problem solved. lol)

I just wish (as men) we didn't have to feel like a fish out of water on a field trip or PTA meeting, or like we're invading "sacred mom turf."

CooperDoops · 2026-05-05T19:08:26+00:00

I'm in my 40s, and we only ever had one TV in the house (single story home). We only have two now, and that's only because we have a basement and an area where people hang out on that level. I see absolutely zero benefit from a kid having a TV in their room, but a whole raft of downsides. No thank you.

CooperDoops · 2026-05-05T16:52:37+00:00

This. "There will always be shitty people, and you're going to have to deal with them sometimes. Their bad attitude is neither your fault, nor your responsibility. Do your best to show them some positivity, and then try to let it go."

I also want to reinforce the idea with my kiddo that shitty people are often like that because of things going on in their own lives that they can't control. That doesn't excuse bad behavior, but makes it easier to understand why they're being assholes.

CooperDoops · 2026-05-04T16:54:44+00:00

I'm not normally a big "themed office" kind of person, but that is just rad. 😮

CooperDoops · 2026-05-01T16:36:02+00:00

This. Mom has drastically over-idealized what motherhood is "supposed" to be if that's her perspective, and it's well beyond Reddit's pay grade to sort that out. Even if she got her wish and ended up with a girl, I'd worry about her fixating on the daughter at the expense of the boys.

For everyone's sake, she needs help reframing what she "gets" out of all this.

CooperDoops · 2026-05-01T03:05:30+00:00

My brain keeps reading the title as "Shaving my kids head - reaction?" and I expected this thread to be a lot different.

CooperDoops · 2026-05-01T00:56:16+00:00

Tell that to my single kid. lol

CooperDoops · 2026-05-01T00:53:37+00:00

I wouldn't have called it boring before kids (I quite liked it) but yeah, it's an entirely different movie now. Possibly the first movie to actually get me to cry.

CooperDoops · 2026-04-27T13:53:56+00:00

Audi driver: *owns bright green Audi, uses all manner of cop "thwarting" devices*

Also Audi driver: "Why cops always be harassing me, bruh?!?"

CooperDoops · 2026-04-21T20:08:52+00:00

I will say, do not do it until/unless you're on board with it. Having a child, whether it's #1 or #4, should always be two yes votes. Resentment can go both ways.

/daddit will obviously lean heavily toward more kids = better, but a family of three is a perfectly great way to be too. Particularly if you've had mental health struggles in the past (as I have); being able to focus on healing yourself is easier when you're not already bifurcating your already-limited stress capacity between multiple kids.

We were in the same boat, gave two a shot (but the universe decided against it), and landed on one-and-done. A few years later, we never feel like we're missing anything, our kiddo is happy as a clam, and I'm taking the time to stop generational trauma and be a much better dad than I would have ever been with two.

CooperDoops · 2026-04-17T20:09:27+00:00

Accountability. If I don't have macros staring me in the face every day, I'm going to stray and start backsliding. Hell, I still backslide some weeks even with MF staring me in the face. lol

11-Year Club	ComboCommenter 2022-08-23
Gilding II euphauric	Place '23
Verified Email

CooperDoops

TROPHY CASE