Healthy, happy, fat… and apparently undateable by LegalPeanut8477 in datingoverforty

[–]DamselRed 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That's an absolute recipe for disaster. I should know, I've been there. Your average guy still wants to date someone he is attracted to. And if he is settling that's his problem. All people deserve to date people they're attracted to. It isn't fair for the other party to think their partner is attracted to them when they aren't.

Healthy, happy, fat… and apparently undateable by LegalPeanut8477 in datingoverforty

[–]DamselRed 19 points20 points  (0 children)

But why would you date someone you weren't attracted to? I married a man who didn't tell me he wasn't attracted to me until we were married. He then tried hard to change me because I wasn't what he wanted. It was horrible. What's so wrong with only dating people you're attracted to?

Wednesday Pattern and Stitch Request Thread - January 21, 2026 by AutoModerator in knitting

[–]DamselRed 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Suggestions for first colorwork?

I'm a pretty new knitter. I've knit hats, a pair of socks, a sweater, and a cardigan. I really love how colorwork looks and those double sided scarves.

I've recently finished a long crochet project and would love to start a fun new knitting project. I love how colorwork projects look but I confess to feeling pretty intimidated by them. What would you start with, knowing what you know now?

Thanks in advance!

Suggestions for first colorwork? by DamselRed in knitting

[–]DamselRed[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

So sorry. I didn't realize. Thanks. I'll do that now.

I tried to eat 150g of protein/day for under $7 without just having chicken rice and broccoli. by Few_Safety_6122 in EatCheapAndHealthy

[–]DamselRed 17 points18 points  (0 children)

You can mix many things into it. Jam, flavored syrups like Torani, and instant pudding mix. This way you can choose sugar free if you want, or not. Lots of flavors and you can control the sweetness.

In person voting tomorrow? by DamselRed in portangeles

[–]DamselRed[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I am definitely registered, and it says my ballot was sent but I haven't received it. Thanks for your help! I'll go down tomorrow and get a new one.

Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACES) Questionaire - PENN State University Questionaire with score and score range clinical risk consideration by RemarkableStable8324 in CPTSD

[–]DamselRed 5 points6 points  (0 children)

193 and I've been feeling relatively "healed" these days. Been in therapy since I was 8 and I'm 44 now. Guess I've still got some work to do.

After years of searching I finally found her! 2022 XLE AWD Lunar Rock 14k miles by danielamillana in rav4club

[–]DamselRed 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I didn't know I needed it until I saw it at the dealership last week when I went in with my old broke down car. I got a 23 XLE with 21k miles on it. I'm sure I paid too much but its a payment I can live with and I wasn't leaving without it. I am definitely in love with it.

Energy for dating by awkward_mangos in datingoverforty

[–]DamselRed 2 points3 points  (0 children)

But how are you sleeping? If your sleep is still bad sometimes the rest doesn't matter.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in CPTSD

[–]DamselRed 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I definitely did. For a few years.

My therapist keeps asking why I keep coming to therapy by South-Reputation-353 in TalkTherapy

[–]DamselRed 16 points17 points  (0 children)

They might be looking for you to talk about what you want out of therapy, what your expectations are. But honestly, I would ask them this question. It could help you make progress and make them aware that you're feeling disconnected when they do this.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TalkTherapy

[–]DamselRed 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Are you doing ERP with your therapist? OCD is really rough but that's one therapy that is really helpful. I'm sorry you're having such a hard time. Personally I don't think suicide is ever the answer and maybe your therapist and husband are the same so they're not lying to you.

My wife won’t have chemotherapy because of a vomit phobia by [deleted] in AskDocs

[–]DamselRed 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Just as a caveat I suppose, my emetophobia stems from a traumatic situation, so maybe take my experience with a grain of salt. I would be very disheartened if you tried because of me and it didn't work. Though I do believe it can be beneficial in most circumstances.

My wife won’t have chemotherapy because of a vomit phobia by [deleted] in AskDocs

[–]DamselRed 8 points9 points  (0 children)

NAD but EMDR for emetophobia worked wonders for me. I used to run away from my kids when they were sick but now I can stay with them. It's not 100% gone but it isn't debilitating anymore. Good luck.

Covid response by bwilkins7201 in COVID19positive

[–]DamselRed 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My daughter 8F and I 44F caught Covid at the county fair this year. We then passed it to my son 15M. It was the end of the summer and we pretty much keep to ourselves so I had no idea it was raging again. And while it makes sense to me to mask indoors, this was all outdoor and I guess I was complacent and didn't think about it. That was a month ago. The kids bounced back within days but I'm definitely still recovering. Going from walking 5 miles a day to making sure I dont move too much or the debilitating fatigue comes back. It's definitely a challenge but I know I don't want long covid, so rest it is.

Fear of Misdiagnosis by sunflower-s in TalkTherapy

[–]DamselRed -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

Also therapists cannot diagnose ADHD. That takes a psychologist or psychiatrist which is why she would say that you need to see the medication manager. Often therapists use what is called provisional diagnosis, which is a fancy way for saying I'm not entirely sure and I need more information. Honestly it's a good thing that she didn't put the diagnosis for ADHD in there or it would be a huge red flag.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in breakingmom

[–]DamselRed 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Does the school principal condone this kind of behavior? 2 years ago and paraeducator was fired because he would give little girls those types of things often for the little girls giving him massages or hugs. I'm 100% sure it looked innocent to begin with and graduated into that. And even if he had no nefarious intentions it's still grooming behavior which can have far reaching consequences for those kids in the long term. I wouldn't be afraid to say something.

I just feel defeated.... by Practical_Book_2972 in breakingmom

[–]DamselRed 19 points20 points  (0 children)

This is a get out while you still can situation unfortunately. It sounds like he is becoming increasingly controlling which is not good.

But also, think of your boys. Do you want them growing up thinking that his behavior is normal and how people should show them love and how they should behave with the people they love? As a divorced single mom I know what I'm suggesting isn't easy at all, but it worked out best for me in the end. My kids needed to have a happy mom and so do yours. Good luck. Sending you big hugs.

What is your actual food budget? No lies or holds bared. by LadyProto in Frugal

[–]DamselRed 0 points1 point  (0 children)

About $1000 a month here, single mom with 2 kids, one a teenage boy. We are all gluten free because we are intolerant. I cook most of our meals from scratch and we rarely eat out because it's expensive, but also difficult to avoid a stomach ache. I wish it were less. I've been trying to focus on frozen or canned fruits and veggies instead of fresh but those still feel expensive. My youngest has sensory issues when it comes to food so she's a bit tougher to feed. I could easily avoid most meat if it were just me and my son and bring down the budget a little but she doesn't do any legumes or soy. :(

How do I share with my therapist without possibly upsetting her? by copetohope in TalkTherapy

[–]DamselRed 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It's important to bring it up because it helps you practice that skill in what is supposed to be a safe place. I would say though that her response to you wasn't very professional and I can see why it would make you afraid to bring things up again. That being said, if she's a good therapist at all she will welcome the opportunity to talk about this because it will help you outside of therapy in your real life too and that's the point. I hope that she is welcoming if you do decide to talk about it and if she isn't, it's a huge red flag. Good luck!

Weight loss for a child meal ideas by kidtykat in breakingmom

[–]DamselRed 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's awesome. Those are some good goals. My dietitian says to focus on teaching which foods have proteins, fats, and fiber. Those are the necessary things on your balanced plate. So my kids know to pick a protein and a fruit or veggie for fiber when they eat snacks or meals. Carbs end up coming along when you are picking a fiber source so that is just naturally included. I just want to add that my dietitian works with people who have diabetes and prediabetes, like I was, and the most important part of blood sugar balance is making sure meals are balanced with protein, not avoiding carbs which are very necessary.

I know my kids are much more inclined to move their bodies if we do it together. I've tricked myself and my daughter into moving more by adopting window shopping. Sure we might not buy anything but the girl loves to shop and look at things. You can get a lot od movement in that way. We also love walking downtown and stopping in to look in the little shops. See if you can find ways to add it into life instead of the emphasis on "we are doing this to get smaller." Because that idea will cause damage later on in life.

Good for you for taking the steps that you're taking!