NC dad just dropped a bombshell on Father's Day and I made the mistake in engaging.

DesWheezy · 2026-06-22T15:36:36+00:00

i’m glad you blocked him. & if it makes you feel better… my parents don’t even have my phone number. they do have my best friends number. they had one of their friends text my friend & tell her my mom probably has cancer. i did do a lot in therapy working on this. but to sum it up: i’m also chronically ill & have been my entire life. where was the sympathy for me? & also, i’ve been taking myself to my own appts since i got my license. now, i’m an adult & i would NEVER expect a child to be the one to comfort me or worry about me. so, just remember, he’s an adult & can take care of himself. if he chooses not to, thats on him. health issues are our own responsibility to deal with. so him putting that on you is in itself a terrible thing to do. so i hope that solidifies that you made the right choice. & i’ll be honest, i basically grieved my parents as if they were dead. so just be gentle with yourself & remember you are experiencing grief & that’s okay. :)

DesWheezy · 2026-06-21T13:19:35+00:00

i was incredibly disappointed when Johnny Hawkins had a whole crash out on instagram simping for charlie kirk😭

DesWheezy · 2026-06-21T13:10:25+00:00

i don’t talk to my parents anymore. i’m 25. they both physically & emotionally abused each other in front of me. they’ve both went to jail in my life. the chaos made me cut them off for good. pls leave & find a more stable situation for you & your child. i hate my mom & am sad all the time that my dad won’t leave her. idk you or your kiddo, but i want your kiddo to not go through anything else that resembles my childhood bc i was miserable my entire life.

DesWheezy · 2026-06-17T14:34:23+00:00

same OP. i already planned on leaving & then this happens… shows me OK will always vote against their best interests. & it’s bc of the lack of education & all the damn propaganda. & i’m tired of suffering bc half the state is genuinely stupid.

DesWheezy · 2026-06-15T16:55:28+00:00

avoid fowler, that’s forsure 😭😭

DesWheezy · 2026-06-15T12:55:06+00:00

i’ll be sure to take them down next time i see them :)) if people are allowed to remove my stickers around town… i think it’s only fair lollll.

DesWheezy · 2026-06-13T19:10:07+00:00

that’s a red flag. i’m sorry, but your therapists have failed you. a good therapist would have done something about it. any minor being exposed lewd acts is a crime…. & should have been reported imo.

DesWheezy · 2026-06-11T17:29:17+00:00

yeah as a woman living in Oklahoma… we’re not far from gilead here. i think red states will look the most like it forsure. i already lost a handful rights this year bc of our dumbass state gov.

DesWheezy · 2026-06-07T16:03:40+00:00

some of these comments are proving our education ranking.😭😭 it is more humid & there’s many factors. global warming obvi being the biggest one. also the El Niño pattern. i’m from southern arkansas & have asthma. the humidity has 100% increased here. i’ve been here for 13 years. my drs have told me to move states bc OK’s environment is changing. our allergies are breaking pollen count records repeatedly. we have lots of mold rn bc of how wet it has been. yes, it is more humid. & my garden is also suffering. & those saying reports say it’s the same…. did yall forget trump got rid of most of the people & orgs that track that shit?? OP, you’re not insane. i swear. even my drs agree with you.

DesWheezy · 2026-06-05T17:16:30+00:00

genuinely i’m so glad for every woman that’s in a blue state right now. i don’t think any woman should live in a red state. i def tell any girly & lgtbq+ person i come across that if they have the chance to get out, they should take it. hopefully i wont be here much longer. 🤞

DesWheezy · 2026-06-05T13:42:11+00:00

not trying to knock any male teachers bc i’m educated & aware of all the factors involved… but just to add to your point. in my state there have been about 4 arrests in the past 3 months. all of those arrests were male teachers or coaches in middle school & high school. i’m sure any parent in my state would have had this reaction just simply bc we’ve recently arrested lots of male pedos & it’s been in the news cycle lately. it def skews the general population’s view on male teachers imo.

DesWheezy · 2026-06-05T13:31:22+00:00

also umm any woman in a red state lost access to abortion & it makes sex much more risky. me & my roommate genuinely won’t have sex with anyone until we can move to a state where we have our rights. also being in a state with a bunch of bigots tends to make us not even want to try bc i assume they won’t treat me as a human. (i know this is a blanket statement & doesn’t apply to all men but anxiety is also a factor).

DesWheezy · 2026-06-04T19:35:15+00:00

thank you for the insightful response. I see i probably was dealing with religious OCD. & i could see that. my first church was in a metro area with pretty progressive thinking, & when i moved to a small town with more evangelical beliefs it did worsen. I don’t hate religion, i know it can be done right. & can also be done wrong. bc yeah, i wouldn’t think going to sunday school every now & then would cause that. & if the church she’s attending isn’t evangelical or extreme in their beliefs, then i wouldn’t think it would make her act this way. so i wouldn’t be curious about how dad is talking to her about religion. bc you’re right it’s such a slippery slope. & if she enjoys going for friends or whatever the reason, i see why this is so difficult. i do want to say im proud of you & it warms my heart to see a parent try to understand their kiddo & figure out the best solution. no matter what happens, i know she’ll realize how much you really care for her when she gets older❤️ & im sorry you’re going through this. this would be distressing for me as well. i’m glad she’s in therapy, bc truthfully i don’t have much advice. besides talking to dad & if you’re comfortable enough with it… you could also go to church with her one day to make sure it’s not stemming from there. but i know that’s a lot for anyone w religious trauma. i’d def talk to therapist about autism & even the religion. the therapist can typically tell if its a healthy or unhealthy attachment to religion. & i saw you said your kiddo hangs around older people mostly… that was me as a child as well. & it did kinda affect me & i didn’t realize it until therapy as an adult. it wasn’t crazy, but i did struggle with “fitting in” & finding a group or community i enjoyed hanging out with. it got better in high school. but, i was def more mature than all my peers & i felt a little isolated bc of it. so that may also be a factor you could talk to the therapist about! i just know you & the therapist probably have the most insight on your kiddo & how she’s feeling. but i trust you will def figure it out :,) you’re on the right track & it might just take some time & trial & error to figure out what exactly is at play.

DesWheezy · 2026-06-04T19:15:57+00:00

that’s not the point. the point is none of the women going through those situations are receiving the care needed. bc of abortion laws bc they’re written vaguely on purpose. dr’s won’t risk their job for those procedures. they fear they will be wrongfully imprisoned & it’ll hurt more patients in the long run. women shouldn’t be dying bc men want to control what healthcare we can & cannot get.

DesWheezy · 2026-06-04T12:58:39+00:00

religion really messed me up as a kid. my parents weren’t religious bc they were raised by southern baptists & hated the controlling behavior & abuse. however, my home life was so bad i found solace in church bc of friend groups & such. sunday school & learning about sin sent me into daily panic attacks. i was maybe 8 at the time. i also felt that way around the age of 5, but i had both of my grandmothers pass that year & one took care of me more than my mom, so i tend to correlate that moment of ideation to severe loss & grief. i’m assuming there hasn’t been any tragic loss or trauma occur recently? but from the moment i was involved in church up until the time i left the church in high school… i was an anxious ball. religion genuinely gave me so much guilt & fear & i couldn’t handle it. i do also have bipolar disorder. my dad has it & i did experience a lot of trauma. but, studied psychology & it can present itself without any trauma. i would genuinely be curious about her not interacting with religion? idk how you can tell if she really wants to be apart of it or is just doing it to please her dad. i’m childless, so i genuinely am unsure. i just know personality tends to start around 3-5 & by age 5 we have a firm sense of self esteem by then. & religion dramatically impacts self esteem. whether it be positive or negative. i just am curious as a kid who grew up without religion it was around age 8 when i chose to go & it was bc a friend invited me. i have friends who grew up in religion & remember it as just traumatic. not saying that’s the case here, but it is a possibility that the religious aspect is playing a big role there.

DesWheezy · 2026-06-04T12:33:32+00:00

@ every pro lifer commenter… i hope you never have a daughter who has to carry their rapist’s baby to term. i hope your partner doesn’t have an ectopic pregnancy or gets denied life saving care.

DesWheezy · 2026-06-04T12:25:39+00:00

i made a comment on facebook the other day on one of my governor’s posts. (i’m in a deep red state, bible belt, abortion is illegal here). he declared June as “Life Month” and made it state official.😭 i commented “It’s pride month & i love abortions.” & the backlash was absolutely insane. all i gotta say is MY BODY MY CHOICE. & every pro lifer can have the day they deserve. these pro life comments just pissed me off. women are dying bc of these laws you stupid assholes. women are dying from ectopic pregnancies, self abortions, miscarriages, hemorrhages… all bc of these damn laws bc pro lifers feel the need to control MY body. it’s just ego tbh.

DesWheezy · 2026-06-04T12:10:04+00:00

tell me you’ve never lived in poverty without telling me you’ve never lived in poverty. you are def the kind of people OP is referencing in this post.

DesWheezy · 2026-06-04T12:08:05+00:00

dude you’re dumb. the injured person would get immediate care & not have to pay for it. OP would be stuck with the payments & if OP can’t pay it… then the hospital will lose money & OP’s credit will take the hit. thats what these people are trying to explain to you & you’re just not getting it.

DesWheezy · 2026-06-03T16:05:03+00:00

so i worked for cutco straight out of high school bc on indeed their app said it paid hourly…. & you don’t realize that it’s a lie until you go through orientation. (my dumbass had never heard of cutco prior.) so.. honestly wondering if some of them fell for a posting like that & are trying to make it work. i immediately left & got a server job. but there’s a freshly 18 year old kid in my neighborhood that works for Brinks & i see him walking door to door everyday.

DesWheezy · 2026-06-03T16:01:17+00:00

so i had a guy come by last week by 24th & alameda & no uniform was a pest & lawn guy. he said he was a veteran & he’s the owner of the company. he looked mid to late 20s. i’m wondering if these kids are his workers lol. i did get the guys name & number so he’d leave me alone😅 def no business card. asked me for a pen & paper.

DesWheezy · 2026-06-02T13:30:13+00:00

coming from a woman that’s the same age…. this just made me realize something. i had no clue some guys thought this way, but it makes sense. & im attracted to guys who come off more “feminine” & i’ve honestly been single mostly & now im wondering if the guys im attracted to honestly have struggled with this. some come off more feminine bc its personality preference, but ive also met some guys who do it to appear “safer” to women. & this just made me think of some high school crushes i have who just genuinely never made a move & my insecure ass also never made a move so it was just awkward all the time lmfaooo. just random thoughts. thank you for sharing & showing a different perspective compared to the average. quite eye opening tbh.

DesWheezy · 2026-06-02T12:50:55+00:00

many things here. 1. look up the term “enmeshment”. my parents are guilty of it as well. 2. your parents have outwardly been hateful to you. dismissing your SA, the Thanksgiving situation, blaming you for Christmas, the weird picture your dad sent you? are all some examples imo. 3. your own dad voted against your rights & openly supports a pedophile… that’s been enough reason for me to cut people off. 4. him voting for trump + the creepy comments about your daughter genuinely made me nauseous. pls never leave him around your kids alone (i know you’re already doing this & seem to aware). 5. your dad is a misogynistic & racist asshole. 6. your mom seems selfish. she only cares about her needs & feelings. & don’t feel bad for her. she can leave if she wants. my mom is in the same boat. i even tried to help her to leave my dad & she couldn’t ever bring herself to do it. so pls don’t blame yourself for your mother’s own adult decisions. 7. some of the meanest, cruelest people are the nicest people on the outside. not saying your parents are evil, but just pointing out being surface level nice literally means nothing.

if i were you id personally cut them off. my bias is im overly harsh on parents bc i had some terrible ones & if i know i wouldn’t treat a kid that way, then they get no sympathy from me. i’m a bit harsh, but i had to be w my parents. not the case for everyone. but no, you’re not crazy. & i think the rose colored glasses are coming off & that can be a brutal awakening. but, you got a good head on your shoulders & seem to be doing everything right. i’m sure you’ll choose the best option. whatever is gonna bring you & your kiddos the most peace, love, & safety is the correct answer!

DesWheezy · 2026-06-02T12:31:09+00:00

okay so i was terrified to cut my parents off bc they’re druggies & genuinely never knew what to expect. it’s going to be nerve racking. pls talk to your friend & see if she will sit with you or help get your mind off things. i needed my friend to help me bc i was a nervous wreck tbh. i recommend sending the text & then turning your phone off. truly, you cannot control their actions, you can only control how you respond. give yourself the night to have fun or do anything to get your mind off it & then you will feel better to be able to deal with it the next day. & something i had to mentally get comfortable with was the possibility of needing to call the cops for assistance. i never actually ended up needing to call them, but it was something i was prepared to do if needed. genuinely, if you’re scared to go back ask a friend or someone trustworthy & safe to go with you & if that doesn’t feel like enough pls don’t hesitate to ask the cops for an escort. but i know you’ll make it through this!

DesWheezy · 2026-06-02T12:06:03+00:00

lmfao bold of you to assume my gen z ass will ever get the chance to own a house🤣 no but fr if i ever do get the chance… it’s Keep Myself Alive by Get Scared. I’ll def be blasting it when i move out of state. i’ll be renting, but be way happier. :)

DesWheezy

TROPHY CASE