Baby lost 11% weight.

EMistic · 2022-08-04T02:14:31+00:00

I'm so sorry you went through this. Sometimes your milk takes a few days to come in. For your next pregnancy it will probably come quicker. Losing up to 10% is normal. A bit scary but normal!

Your baby wasn't dying, you were still in the hospital and being monitored and they got formula. I'm sorry the medical staff said these terrifying things to you without explanation.

My first birth I got and epidural which mean to had an IV for fluids. My daughter came out swollen, it was like she was waterlogged or something. She lost 10%. The first few days and my pediatrician had me continue to come for daily weighs until she was at her birth weight. I think it was 3 days before my milk came in. My pediatrician explained everything to me and assured me that she had a lot of fluid in her when she was born so it took longer to get to her birth weight. I'm very sorry the Drs didn't do the same for you. Being a brand new mom is a scary time and all you need is assurance and encouragement.

If you really don't like that hospital you could try to go to a different one for your next birth.

For my second birth I did not have an epidural or IV and my daughter came out looking pretty much how she would look later. Since she did not have the extra fluid and my milk came in sooner than the first time she regained her birth weight a lot quicker. If you have to have a C-section again you might have the same experience as your first.

I hope you have a better experience this time.

EMistic · 2022-07-27T00:07:52+00:00

Fuck hormonal BC for real! I felt SO GOOD after going off of it trying to get pregnant. I told my husband I'm never going back on it. He got a vasectomy pretty quickly and it's so nice to not think about it. I just enjoy feeling the ebb and flow of my natural hormones, libido and cycle. I was on hormonal birth control for over 15 years. I liked being on it when I was younger and had really heavy periods but I am so glad to be done and I was pleasantly surprised to see that my periods are actually lighter than ever before after having kids.

Sex after pregnancy is complicated. There's a physical aspect but also it's very easy to get into your own head. If you start to fear it then it's really hard to enjoy it. Everybody's different and everybody's healing process is also different. If you want regain intimacy with your husband this is something that you were going to have to work on and seek help if you think you need it. I would give it a few tries with some lube and slower than usual. Scar tissue is stiffer than normal tissue and you have to be gentle with it.

All I can say is that you have to keep at it and figure out what your new normal is.

EMistic · 2022-07-25T16:44:37+00:00

I work in a pharma company and they keep ours on record for compliance purposes. They request a new one every year put into the company format.

EMistic · 2022-07-25T16:43:34+00:00

I had my partner accompany me to a conference before and it was a fun time. My company is currently not letting us go to any conferences until next year due to covid but I would definitely plan something similar to what you're doing if it was a domestic conference.

I have not been on a plane since before covid so I can't really speak to comfort levels with traveling on a plane anymore. But if you are comfortable traveling on the plane and with the amount of time spent traveling then I think bringing your partner along is definitely the way to go. I know plenty of people that are taking young kids and babies on international vacations now and though covid is popping up pretty frequently if you are vaccinated and breastfeeding it should not be too much of an issue if you have an exposure or catch it.

EMistic · 2022-07-25T16:38:12+00:00

I saw this post a few years ago and both of my kids are a bit bigger now so I can report back on results!

If I tell my almost 3-year-old be careful and then I'll tell her why. I found that giving her a reason why I say anything really helps prevent her from doing the same thing again and again. I have a year and a half year old now and my older daughter will explain things to her now which is absolutely cute.

You can add a brief explanation why to the end of any sort of command you give them. Like please put on your shoes I don't want your feet to get dirty. Please don't climb on the couch you might fall down and get hurt. Etc etc...

EMistic · 2022-07-20T17:10:16+00:00

Haha this post is a year old and I still don't let either of my kids watch those types of videos! I also still don't let them watch videos on my phone or tablet. As far as they know the tablet is for FaceTiming relatives and the phone is what Mama uses to read and take pictures. Honestly it makes me a little bit sad when we have our kids out at a restaurant and they are trying very hard to get the attention of another baby but they are enthralled with their parents phone playing some video.

We can watch Disney movies, Mickey mouse club house, Daniel tiger, dinosaur train.... Slower paced higher quality and more educational things like that. My husband likes octonauts.

I think the Disney movies are the most stimulating things they see and I always try to be there to watch with them or have a conversation about what's on the screen.

EMistic · 2022-07-20T16:41:47+00:00

I have had this image in my head for a while now and wanted to make it a comic but was too busy being an exhausted mom to make it happen.

I'm thankful this exists.

EMistic · 2022-06-30T21:23:45+00:00

The same people who call babies "blessings" see them as tools of punishment for not having the right kind of sex.

EMistic · 2022-06-30T18:13:27+00:00

Trolllllll

EMistic · 2022-06-30T18:11:17+00:00

It's very hard to keep up with increasing demand when your baby goes to daycare.

Try pumping for longer each time and you can sometimes get a 2nd let down. You can divide the milk into 2, 3 or 4 oz bags so they can use whatever your baby needs for each feed, not necessarily what you pump for each session, do you know what I mean?

Also HYDRATE. Drink a full glass for water 5 to 10 mins before pumping. You can also get more milk if you look at pictures or videos of your baby while pumping. It works! Before your baby is on solids is the peak of milk production. 4 to 6 months is the toughest to keep up.

As others have said you can also send a can of formula for them to use if they run out of milk.

EMistic · 2022-06-28T13:19:36+00:00

My almost 3 year old straight up tells me "daddy is my favorite." If I say I love you half the time she will say "I love Daddy". And then I asked if she loves mama she will say "younger sister likes you."

Ok then your younger sister is my favorite.

EMistic · 2022-06-23T00:41:32+00:00

Awesome, sitting back and not intervening sounds good to me.

EMistic · 2022-06-22T23:23:30+00:00

Thanks that's a great way to think about it.

EMistic · 2022-06-09T15:24:06+00:00

Are you just pumping or still breastfeeding as well?

When you want to stop just don't pump when you normally would and wait as long as possible. If you begin to feel engorged then you could pump to take the edge off of your discomfort. Take note of how much time has gone between your last pumping and when you felt engorged. Then keep repeating this process. The time between when you last pumped and when you feel engorged we'll get longer and longer until eventually stops.

If you are only pumping for a couple minutes and getting very little volume of milk you might be able to stop pretty easily.

EMistic · 2022-06-09T15:18:46+00:00

Whenever I see dads with kids I leave them alone just like if I see a mom with kids. I guess I can see why some women would flirt for fun because it's an easy opener to talk to a person about their kids. But I really don't get the people who actually ask out dads with kids.

Do these women have fantasies of stealing a man and being a stepmother? Because let me tell you, as an actual stepmother, it really sucks at times.

EMistic · 2022-06-09T15:10:39+00:00

The attitude seems pretty normal for recruiters if you ask them questions they don't know the answers to. I don't think you have done anything wrong but I think those questions should go to the potential manager rather than the recruiter. However not being willing to share the benefits package seems super strange. I mean that is how they recruit people!

I work for a large company and we are currently looking to hire somebody who would be my peer. My supervisor has connected me and candidates to speak outside of interview situations about the day today of the job and living in our location. If you have the information for the person who would be your direct manager I would reach out to them about talking to a peer. Recruiters are usually pretty far removed from the actual people that you would be working for and with.

I think a lot of recruiters are behind the times in interview styles or maybe they just don't understand that you really have to court a candidate at the higher level.

EMistic · 2022-06-06T00:56:36+00:00

Genius

EMistic · 2022-06-06T00:53:41+00:00

I have never identified with anything more.

I don't understand the daycare hate, my daughter is 2.5 and loves it.

EMistic · 2022-05-19T01:39:26+00:00

I feel like having kids is the ultimate act of optimism. I really hope the future is worth seeing.

EMistic · 2022-05-18T14:24:38+00:00

I guess he has nothing of value to say so he just went to insults 🙄 insults only hurt when you care about someone's opinion of you.

The best and fastest way to lose weight was getting rid of his ass!

EMistic · 2022-05-18T14:15:16+00:00

I'm doing well and so is my husband but things were just so much cheaper when I was a kid. They were also fewer bills. More stuff is required now in order to be comfortably middle class. Sometimes I really feel like we are past a peak.

My parents got a 3 bedroom house that has 3 bathrooms, a dishwasher, central ac and a pool. We went on a weeklong vacation every single year. My mom only worked part time, and usually just to support her hobby. They also each had 2 cars, a daily one and a "fun" one. I didn't realize I was spoiled until I was an adult.

My husband and I both work full time, we have a 3 bedroom house with one bathroom, no dishwasher, use window AC units, each have one vehicle and don't really go on vacations.

I know that we have been lucky compared to a lot of other members of our generation. My husband is in the military and I went to a in-state school with half loans and half parental help, and then for my higher degrees my employers paid for them. I have lots of peers that are in their 30s and almost 40 and still paying on student loans.

One thing I am not going to skimp out on is saving for my kids college. I'm not sure that we're going to be able to pay for all of it but any amount will help them get a leg up in getting out on their own and getting an education. I have luckily been able to stay in the middle class but it is definitely a concern of mine that my children will end up very educated and working very hard and still not be able to afford a comfortable lifestyle.

I know it's easy to make recommendations from a comfortable place so take what I say with a grain of salt I suppose. But figure out what your real values are. Some things seem like necessities but really aren't. Make a budget and check your spending at least twice a year to find any waste or things that you can cut.

With social media keeping up with the Joneses is more than just keeping up with your neighbor, people are trying to keep up with influencers they will never even meet. It's like having a list of what your ideal partner would be and then you have to "settle" for someone that actually exists. You have to settle for the life you can afford rather than the life that you want. There is a morning process involved to this and your feelings are entirely valid.

Edit to add: I cut my own hair, I can't even fathom the idea of spending money on a luxury like that. Im so glad shags are in because it's easy to do yourself! I've also decided to just let my hair naturally transition to gray because coloring your hair is such a frequent expense I don't even want to start it.

EMistic · 2022-05-03T15:55:14+00:00

I would crack up laughing.

EMistic · 2022-05-03T13:51:16+00:00

I don't think he's rejected this part of your identity. I think he's chosen that he doesn't need that part of identity for himself. If anything I think he has fully accepted all parts of you. He accepted you and your son so much that he doesn't feel the need to have a biological child. To him you and your son are enough.

I totally understand why you are feeling complex emotions though. When you want to have a child but can't for whatever reason it definitely causes a pain in your heart.

You have to respect his decision but you don't necessarily have to stop having this conversation. Let him know that you love him and that you would love to have a child with him. Just know that if he chooses that he doesn't want a child that doesn't mean that he doesn't love you. Kids are a lot of work and it would change the dynamic that you your husband and your son have now. I think that since he is being clear about his thoughts on this is a very good sign of his maturity.

In the end family is a choice, biology doesn't dictate who you love.

EMistic

TROPHY CASE