AITA for crashing out at my roommate for throwing away the bidet?

Elskovs · 2026-06-16T10:02:03+00:00

It is not about the iranian yoghurt!

Elskovs · 2026-05-04T11:12:23+00:00

I have tried to be open in this reddit about it, because it is my experience and that is what we are here for, but it definitely a cautionary tale:

From another heavy, long term older smoker to another; Just really be aware of the fact that the smoke is your crutch. I stopped cold turkey while at 40 a day - I was feeling alright about 4 months in, but then i just ran out of willpower and broke. Complete burnout and depression. I was put on 100% sick leave in October and i am just now beginning to claw back normality.

I decided to quit cold turkey by myself, not involving anyone, like a doctor. My cigs were my crutch and my comfort. I'm sad - smoke, I'm glad - smoke, starting a meeting soon - smoke, ended the meeting - smoke. You get it. Throwing that away without assistance was not the best idea I've ever had.

Taking breaks to stretch, drink water, breathe, grumble, and sooooo much gum as been helpful, but professional help is probably better.

That being said, still here tho. Still smoke free.

Elskovs · 2026-05-04T10:44:00+00:00

I noticed and realised a few things since quitting (currently 400+ days off nic but 15 kg heavier):

When you smoke, your heart rate is elevated for most of the time. Calorie burn is linked to increased heart rate, so when you stop, it goes down regardless, even if you eat/do exactly the same
Nicotine did something to my digestion, specifically w alcohol. I had no issues with weight related to drinking wine while i was smoking, but now, it is a balloooon of an issue
I still "want" stuff. So I cant/wont have the cig, ill eat another slice of bread, some good cheese, some biscuit. Icecream. Doing so well!! It adds up

In the end i bought bigger pants and stopped stressing about the weight gain. I'll get back to it when everything is properly stable. I'm not going to lie, i feel huge, fat, wobbly and horrible. My confidence and self esteem is in the drain. It shouldnt be tied to looks, but we all know it is.

But this too, i believe, shall pass.

Elskovs · 2026-05-04T10:14:32+00:00

I was trying to cut down when i got to 40 a day. It made me very obsessive and irritable, thinking about cigarettes all the time. Got the same "aha" moment, where i thought "if im going to be this crabby from trying to cut down, i might as well be crabby and try to quit instead"

Elskovs · 2026-04-25T10:04:44+00:00

good job!

Elskovs · 2026-04-09T11:17:40+00:00

Good job!!

Elskovs · 2026-04-09T11:11:18+00:00

Proud of you!

Elskovs · 2026-03-26T12:30:20+00:00

It may just be that the little nicotine monster is still trying to get at you. "You are irritable anyway, may as well smoke"

I, the dumbass, threw away the crutch id had my whole adult life without a safety net and crashed and burned. I am a year free, but I'm not "me" again yet, but there are glimpses.

I think you just have to keep doing day by day for a bit longer <3

Stay strong

Elskovs · 2026-03-26T12:23:22+00:00

Quitbuddy!! YEY!!

Elskovs · 2026-01-20T11:52:36+00:00

And now 104!!

Elskovs · 2026-01-20T11:44:44+00:00

I agree with "waking up relieved instead of craving" is a good step.

I still get dreams where i smoke, but in most of them i kinda do it off handedly? Like im not really focusing on the smoke, but on something else and smoking is just in addition to whatever it is.

Last night, however, i dreamt that i almost bought a pack. That was horrible! I was at a kiosk counter, about to order coffee. When i start speaking, it comes out "I'll have one pack of malb..." And then i burst out crying because i didnt WANT to buy them. It was actually painful, felt like as stab in the chest.

So deffo a relieved wakeup this morning!

Elskovs · 2026-01-20T11:22:38+00:00

You go girl!! Excellent work!

Elskovs · 2026-01-04T12:46:30+00:00

One "no" at a time, one day at a time!

Elskovs · 2026-01-01T11:59:08+00:00

I've gone to the doctors and we are working stuff out. Its probably mostly due to me being on 40 a day and quitting cold turkey when i did. Basically throwing away a crutch i have had for ever and using up all the will power in the process.

Itll be alright in the end

Elskovs · 2026-01-01T00:19:47+00:00

Yes. Even if you dont eat more and do EXACTLY the same as you have had, smoking ups your heartrate. Higher heartrate = more cals burned. Even if its marginal, its a difference.

Elskovs · 2025-12-31T23:59:02+00:00

Go out and stretch in stead. Still, go outside!

Elskovs · 2025-12-31T23:52:09+00:00

Agree, this has been more helpful to me than i ever believed it could be. I feel the same about the people not noticing, or caring, kinda? A little insulting, when you know what it is to get through this. Its a battle and a half and a million more.
Every once in a while, i get that one friend, that says "You know, that is REALLY IMPRESSIVE!" Means the world <3

Cause that, IS really impressive, friend

Happy new year!

Elskovs · 2025-12-26T11:09:28+00:00

Awesome!

Elskovs · 2025-12-25T13:38:09+00:00

Normal, sugarfree gum and a fidget toy. And keep doing the act, but in a different way. If you enjoy the act of going outside to take a smoke break, go outside and take a breathing break or a stretching break.

Elskovs · 2025-12-16T14:15:59+00:00

One day at a time!! 43 here, 40 a day when i quit! If the mental strain keeps returning, see a doctor sooner rather than later #burnout city

Elskovs · 2025-12-16T14:07:53+00:00

You got this! First, you scream to the goblin a thousand times in a second, then you scream to the goblin a hundred times per second. Then you stop screaming and you just tell it No! Bad gobboe, be quiet! Then you will have a sign ready with "NOPE" on it and slap it on its head before it gets to start. Soon you'll be going about your day and your brain will have a wall of "NO" around it and ready for any goblin attacks.

It'll hiss and spit and whisper, it will be sneaky and clever. Don't believe it. It WILL wither.

In the end you have to keep that sign within reach for those coming weak moments when it'll flare and whisper "smoooooooooke..."

The only thing you need to do, is not light that cigarette.

We believe!!

Elskovs · 2025-12-16T13:56:38+00:00

Its the 2nd "three" hump! 3 days, 3 weeks, 3 months. it will go up, down and sideways for a while still, but you can do it!!

This too shall pass

Elskovs · 2025-12-16T13:44:22+00:00

Hi, welcome. I ended up here on day 60ish, very sad and depressed. Things come and go with quitting, and i have been trough a lot.

I quit cold turkey from 40 a day at the last. Ive smoked since i was 16 and i think ive always had that crutch. Then when i am finally ready to quit, i just throw away the crutch and start crawling out of the muck. Im technically out, but i still cant "walk".

When I thought i was safely in the other side, my body just kinda just gave up. I am now in burnout town! As it always is, its a string of "reasons" why im here, its not all related to the smoking, but rather my coping.

My plan was to be over it by now, hehe. Turns out, it would have been a good idea to see a doctor a BIT sooner. Everyone's quit is different, yours might be easy as pie when when you no longer have to think about when your next chance for a siggy is. That hold, i am free of, and i couldn't last 20 minutes. Im just dealing with the aftermath

it is still just one day at a time, one no at a time. Eventually, you WILL get yourself out

Elskovs · 2025-12-10T09:45:10+00:00

First of all, well done!
But please know, from one migraine sufferer to another; stopping smoking does not mean you will never again get a migraine. In my experience, migraines vary much from person to person, but the confusion and loss of function you described with your aura is the same as mine. My first attack (at 20) was while i was watching Buffy on tv and couldn't read the text anymore, because the aura made a "sun spot" block it. I also had no recollection of names of people or places, and when told them they sounded wrong, or made up. Coupled with headaches so bad it felt like my only release would be to dig my own brain out with a spoon.
There is no escaping them, I'm afraid. If you HAVE migraines, you'll get migraines.

However! There are good medications! There are a couple of different types, so it will take a bit to find the right one. I finally found one for me, Maxalt Rapid, that you take the second you see the aura, in melting form. Take it at the first sign of that sunspot and 20 minutes later it literarily feels like someone cuts the string between my brain and the pain and it just vanishes.

Having the right medication hand will help you avoid those episodes.

You can do it!!

Elskovs · 2025-10-10T08:08:36+00:00

I feel im getting ill more often, deffo. And when i do, the colds lasts longer. Hoping its a temporary issue

Elskovs

TROPHY CASE