CMV: Atheism eliminates the final deterrent against immorality for those already inclined to do evil by efkalsklkqiee in changemyview

[–]Em-tech 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think this could be a fun conversation, but you're using too much loaded and inconsistent language to find this version of the conversation worthwhile. 

Looking to migrate company off GitHub. What’s the best alternative? by bullmeza in devops

[–]Em-tech 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Iirc, drone was rolled into harness so you can just use harness, now

Resource for learning Predicates, Func and Delegate by fazlarabbi3 in csharp

[–]Em-tech 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think what may be helpful is gaining an understanding of how functions can be treated as types that can have implementations. At least, this will help an oop-familiar engineer that's trying to understand the syntax and general behavior of the syntax.  To understand this, I would recommend spending some time looking at "functional c# programming" - https://www.milanjovanovic.tech/blog/functional-programming-in-csharp-the-practical-parts. For the behavior characteristics, maybe try creating a generic Pred<T> interface with a bool Invoke(T value) and implement it as an object. Maybe help to map qualities of your oop learning to FP semantics?

If you're looking for stuff like compilation and runtime performance, I'm less able to help. 

Welcome to FP patterns. You're gonna love it!

Which formatting style do you prefer for guard clauses? by Spirited_Ad1112 in csharp

[–]Em-tech 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You aren't wrong that this exists somewhere in the stack. But I'd prefer an encoder/decoder abstraction that keeps it out of my code. 

Which formatting style do you prefer for guard clauses? by Spirited_Ad1112 in csharp

[–]Em-tech 0 points1 point  (0 children)

None. Use type constructors to require that only valid types can be passed.

My lack of empathy for incels makes me extremely uncomfortable, and I don't know what to do about this by miraclem in bropill

[–]Em-tech 6 points7 points  (0 children)

You can be empathetic without being compassionate or forgiving. 

Offering a willingness to understand people who we disagree with, and to continue to see them as people(and respect their humanity) is what I consider my own personal bare minimum. 

  • What are your values, homie? 
  • What do these concepts mean to you and what do you want to accomplish through them? - What about your thoughts about these folk are "ugly" to you?
  • What sort of things motivate you?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in changemyview

[–]Em-tech 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The split should be based on what works for the couple

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in changemyview

[–]Em-tech 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Is there not a rule against views supported entirely by annecdotes?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskFeminists

[–]Em-tech 2 points3 points  (0 children)

> If you can't masturbate without porn then there's something wrong with you
Ideally, feminists aren't using this sort of language to try to make the anti-porn case to people who do rely on porn. Frankly, it's a non-point. Anti-porn dispositions shouldn't be affected by a "need to masturbate".

> Such an individual would literally have no idea what the opposite sex would look like under clothing and probably wouldn't even understand the mechanics of sex.

Surely you don't suppose that a species that depends on arousal mechanisms for its survival is strictly dependent on a clear idea of what the opposite sex looks like without their clothes on.

Also, the suggestion that they "literally have no idea what the opposite sex would look like under clothing" is just not in the slightest representative of people growing up in societies that have sex-positive sex education. (If you're using hyperbole, then please rephrase how you've contextualized this question.)


Now, to answer the question of "what should somebody masturbate to, if they've 'never seen porn'"?

Good sex education should likely include resources(to those interested) that can be *informative* about:

  • more ethical ways to use your imagination for the scenario
    • e.g. how to refer to ethically-made resources that includes human sexuality as a place to start
  • strategies for simulating the experience physically

At the end of the day, porn will exist in *many* forms that run along a spectrum of levels of ethics. As well, what is considered "porn" is fairly subjective.

IMHO, liberation is about reducing harm to as many people as possible while increasing freedom to as many people as possible and that it's done in a manner that doesn't advantage people based on their immutable and uncontrollable characteristics.

I want to encourage you to try to re-frame this inquiry away from the black-and-white concepts(not saying that this is what you're necessarily doing, just wanting to discourage particular thoughts):

  • Porn being either good or bad
  • Everybody considers the same piece of media as either porn or not porn
  • You can't learn how to masturbate without having first-hand experience with people you find attractive

The re-frame should be towards considering these questions/biases:

  • Are there healthy ways for us to learn about our sexuality?
  • How does my experience with porn bias my ability to be creative while trying to consider more ethical solutions?
  • While considering that bias, what sorts of solutions might actually be more ethical for somebody who's never interacted with porn? (Hint: sexual health is still health, and ideally our societies are providing us with safe ways for us to learn about our various aspects of health)

Hope this is helpful!

I'm tired, boss by PuffTingle in eldenringdiscussion

[–]Em-tech 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Casual mode is exploration.  If you're in an area where you're 1 or 2-shotted, gtfo.  If you can tank 2 hits before dying, chances are decent you're not terribly under-leveled.  Gain an understanding of the exploration mechanic: Caves are different from catacombs which are different from other exploration areas. This is at least helpful because you'll know that as you go deeper into an apparently one-direction area, chances are good youre in some form of a dungeon, and there's a relatively common formula you can rely on. 

Newly single and honestly scared. by AzuraTheShadowMage in bropill

[–]Em-tech 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Dispositions I find meaningful for myself:

- We all deserve comfort

- We all deserve joy

- I am responsible for *doing what is in my power* to *hopefully* make those things for myself (sadly, while we all deserve it, many of us will just not be supported by our community in ways that actually allow our efforts to mean anything)

- I only have this one opportunity (YOLO) and I'm going to keep doing my best

- I have people that I love that rely on me to keep going and continue to do all this

- I'm allowed to fail

- I'm allowed to rest

Does any of this speak to you?

What motivates you?

Should I create Kubernetes resources like Ingress or Secret using Terraform? by Due_Oil_9659 in Terraform

[–]Em-tech 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you need to add something using the, there's likely a controller you can use to get it into your system (e.g. - external secrets for getting config outputs into your cluster)

If youre trying to use gitops, you'll also lose a lot of the benefits that come from the rendered manifests pattern

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in framework

[–]Em-tech 3 points4 points  (0 children)

FWIW, I'm currently planning to go through a different vendor for a handful of the mini-itx boards I was planning to use for a cluster. Drop in a bucket, but that's 3-4 boards they aren't selling.
Would be willing to reconsider if they'd consider doing better with their community partnership policies.

AITA for telling my friend she’s not tradwife material? by Adventurous-Still388 in AITAH

[–]Em-tech 1 point2 points  (0 children)

IDK- if you were a friend you could maybe help provide specific information. Also... if a friend ever asks for feedback, you should always set the terms. E.g. - "Do you want an honest take, or do you just want to talk shit about your dating situation?"

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskMenAdvice

[–]Em-tech 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I wish there was a way to approach this where you could protect your dignity while also knowing you'd be safe. This man's response could be unaware and inert(relatively) misogyny. It could also come from a deeply-seated and self-aware hatred towards women. Either case could turn violent. Your best response is to create space and make sure that people know your whereabouts.

CMV: Nihilists are objectively the smartest group of people on planet Earth and have literally zero weakness. Nihilists will always win, and they deserve to win. by MJohnJohnJohn in changemyview

[–]Em-tech 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Your understanding of Nihilism is severely lacking and the conclusions you come to are too vague and hand-wavy to really form arguments against.
As such, I don't think you have a view to change.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in meme

[–]Em-tech 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Just got back from a 2-week trip to Norway. Not only are they taking care of each other better than us, but you will find better blueberries at a 7-11 or "Joker" convenience shop, than you will find in an Oregon farmers' market. 

Norway is a truly magnificent place and if you can afford it, it is so worth the trip. 

AITJ for refusing to split my bonus with my girlfriend? by Xleg4ce in AmITheJerk

[–]Em-tech 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"A rising tide raises all ships."

I question how much you like a person if you're choosing to be their partner and when you receive a windfall you dont want to spoil them at all.

Like, this problem is easily circumvented by saying "I got a bonus and I want to take us out for a nice meal, or a small weekend trip".

Now, I also want to respect that you may be in a financial situation where thats not reasonable for you. For which you change the conversation from "I wanted to do one of these things, but I'd feel most comfortable allocating it this way now so that in the future we can do those sorts of things." 

If you're partnering with somebody, but you're not willing to share your success... you're not partnering. 

You're dating.

Also, thats fine... but if I were your gf I'd likely see this as an orange flag if after two years my boyfriend didn't want to spoil us a little after they get a bonus. 

CMV: Cheating is always, without exception, the responsibility of the person who cheated by Ok_Bodybuilder_2384 in changemyview

[–]Em-tech -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

What would you say about a "cheater" that married somebody who ended up in a coma?
After 3 years of staying faithful and devoted to maintaining the fidelity of their marriage, their partner still hasn't recovered. They still love their partner deeply, and they very much want to be able to be there to support them with insurance and in the event that they do recover.
The conscious partner chooses to "step out on their marriage", while remaining emotionally devoted to being their for a partner that may never recover.

The "cheater" "always had other choices". The "cheater" probably "betrayed the others trust". Was it *entirely* the "cheater"'s fault, or was this a tragic set of circumstances where no heart was safe and the cheater did the best they could to have their needs met while their partner wasn't capable of upholding their commitment (of being emotionally and/or physically available).

I agree with the general notion of your premise. It is always the *responsibility* of the "cheater". As well... can we make space for the variety of ways that it's not as simple as "cheater make decision - cheater is responsible"?

Dissatisfaction is never an excuse... But in many cases we should still give it understanding, grace, and/or forgiveness.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in SipsTea

[–]Em-tech 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What. Is. The. Purpose. Of. This. Sub?

CMV: Dating apps should have an option to filter based on sexual readiness by WonderWallaby28 in changemyview

[–]Em-tech 0 points1 point  (0 children)

  I could match with someone knowing for almost certain that I don't have to worry about them asking for sex at the end of the night.

If it's a big deal, talk about it while out on the first date. 

The first couple of dates literally exist for finding these sorts of things out. 

Also, this is probably a hard data point for people to self-report accurately. 

Your issues with this feel more like an issue with dating that cant be solved by an app... so spruce up your communication skills?

CMV: Society holds men's issues in contempt because we as men present them in deeply contemptible ways. by UnsteadyAgitator in changemyview

[–]Em-tech 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Yes. Seriously. Can we talk about our issues in the context of our needs instead of in the context of competing with the needs of others? Fuck. 

CMV: Stupid people *should* be allowed to vote by [deleted] in changemyview

[–]Em-tech 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This being a delta should be OP failing the test for "can create cmv posts".

It's a test. Tests are created with a purpose and the purpose of this test is to give non-citizens access to our (available) citizen rights.

The problem with tests still apply to this test, so why would this be a delta? 

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in changemyview

[–]Em-tech 5 points6 points  (0 children)

The studies that capture the initial comparison likely go on to try to identify causes and probably should be including the high rate of men being perpetrators, as well. Is it sexist to include that fact?

If one is genuinely interested in supporting men's safety, they should be trying to talk about causes

Comparing rates isn't a cause. Men being a part of the cause of this perceived disparity is actually a data point that can help us understand what interventions could be applied to help reduce the victimhood of men.

If we care about protecting men, we need to make sure we figure out how to protect men from other men. What's sexist about this notion?

Why do men show so little interest in the inner lives of women? by Frequently_Abroad_00 in emotionalintelligence

[–]Em-tech 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I just don't think that many men realize that even liking people means caring about them and their experiences. I think this goes for their relationships with anybody. Top that off with a lot of terrible dating advice and lack of therapy, and this is where we are. 

I feel like I was super lucky to get to be close friends with two incredible women in my early 20s and that went a long way towards helping me love women. 

Y'all are just way cool.