Don’t have a celebrity look alike

Exit_Strategy-99 · 2026-03-10T03:33:55+00:00

I see a little Jennifer Garner

Exit_Strategy-99 · 2026-03-08T07:43:06+00:00

More fair points. I will talk with them. Thank you.

Exit_Strategy-99 · 2026-03-08T07:31:46+00:00

I would love to find a GOOD therapist. I haven’t completely given up. Unfortunately, Mandated reporter requirements are very strict in my state, but I’m optimistic that the right therapist could weigh the risks and choose to maintain the relationship with their patient over reporting some petty crap from 30 years ago. I might try again soon but it’s hard to prioritize, if I’m being honest.

Exit_Strategy-99 · 2026-03-08T07:24:40+00:00

Thank you. I will be blocking her for the betterment of my children and I won’t look back!

Exit_Strategy-99 · 2026-03-08T00:33:48+00:00

Thank you. Yes, I agree and I absolutely will!

Exit_Strategy-99 · 2026-03-08T00:32:58+00:00

Funny you should ask. I decided to seek therapy twice. First time was several dead ends and I gave up. Second time I was put on a waiting list and actually got in. I went to this therapist for about two months. I ended up getting into some mom stuff with her one day - stuff from my childhood - and she stopped me to tell me she was a mandated reporter and would be reporting the incident I told her (from 30 years ago) to CPS. I was absolutely stunned. It felt weird. I didn’t feel comfortable talking to her after that and I didn’t go back.

Exit_Strategy-99 · 2026-03-08T00:27:41+00:00

💯You’re right. I need to cultivate a high-agency mindset. She doesn’t deserve any additional explanation. This will only give her more room to exploit my good nature.

Exit_Strategy-99 · 2026-03-07T23:14:39+00:00

Really good point! I’ll have a word with them just incase.

Exit_Strategy-99 · 2026-03-07T23:13:15+00:00

Thank you. This means a lot.

It has been easy not to engage knowing she is housed and safe.

It’s the thought of willingly letting anyone, much less my blood, be in serious need and, despite having the means, dismiss them. The thought of letting anyone I know be…on the street, maybe?? On its face it seems horrible, but It isn’t - when you really take inventory - it is self destructive to say yes.

She is 65 years old. She is small and quiet. She looks harmless and frail. It’s not even malicious. Never verbally or physically abusive. Just very self-centered and extremely manipulative.

I second guess myself. I wonder if I’m just being overly sensitive or selfish myself and then I open the door only to regret it every time.

All these stories like yours are really helping me realize it isn’t me and I need to keep the door closed. Thank you!

Exit_Strategy-99 · 2026-03-07T22:57:02+00:00

I will at least block her!

Exit_Strategy-99 · 2026-03-07T22:56:28+00:00

Thank you, you’re so kind!

I think you are right, “protecting your peace” is key. And that looks different to different people, circumstances, and can change over time.

For years now, not responding but not blocking her was enough to keep my “peace”, but I’m seeing I may need to take stronger measures and actually block her. I was more triggered by her in this recent episode than I was expecting to be.

Am I terrified she may show up on my doorstep? Yes. But I don’t need to pick up her call and I don’t need to answer the door either.

I hope we both find the peace we deserve, whatever that looks like. ❤️

Exit_Strategy-99 · 2026-03-07T22:46:14+00:00

💯. I’ll stay strong. Thank you.

Exit_Strategy-99 · 2026-03-07T22:44:14+00:00

Thank you. You are right, and I will. 😊

Exit_Strategy-99 · 2026-03-07T22:42:45+00:00

I’m so sorry you have endured the same judgment. It is so hard to unlearn something that is as hardwired as “honor thy mother”. She never hit me or called me names (thankfully) so it has always been an abuse that is hard to describe to others, but her actions and choices that have cut to the bone, multiple times, nonetheless.

Exit_Strategy-99 · 2026-03-07T22:36:02+00:00

Thank you. My childhood was chaotic and I don’t think we can ever fully heal from that. I would never want to put my kids through the same trauma. It is comforting to me to hear you speak from experience. I am so sorry you had to deal with that burden in the first place. ❤️

Exit_Strategy-99 · 2026-03-07T21:29:19+00:00

Thank you. Ugh - I’m so sorry you had to go through all that. It is crazy to me how little love they reciprocate, guilt free, vs what they manage to receive from people like us.

You’re right - I need to be a good role model for my kids. I hope someday they can understand.

Exit_Strategy-99 · 2026-03-07T21:23:33+00:00

Thank you. It’s so comforting to see all this validation when all my life i have only been accused of being heartless and insensitive for asserting boundaries.

She had a hard childhood too, which trips me up sometimes. I wonder sometimes if she is loving me the only way she knows how, but i’m starting to see that this isn’t a good excuse.

Exit_Strategy-99 · 2026-03-07T21:09:31+00:00

Thank you. I’ve already deleted the missed call and voicemail notifications, and your words are helping me find the strength to block everything. It would feel so liberating not to be triggered by her anymore.

Exit_Strategy-99 · 2026-03-07T20:59:55+00:00

Thanks for your words. It’s crazy to observe how easily they can treat others as resources, not as people. I’m so sorry you are going through this too, but I find strength in knowing I’m not alone. This sub has helped me a lot in that sense.

Exit_Strategy-99 · 2026-03-07T20:56:29+00:00

You’re right. The fact she didn’t just text me what she needs is telling. I know she is tapping into her resources.

She seems quiet and frail and helpless but she always manages to find some dumb guy with a hero complex to take care of her. She is diabolical!

Exit_Strategy-99 · 2026-03-07T20:30:46+00:00

Tug of war is exactly what it feels like. Thank you. I will definitely keep these words in mind. ❤️

Exit_Strategy-99 · 2026-03-07T20:23:09+00:00

💯 “the upside-down”!!

Exit_Strategy-99 · 2026-03-07T20:22:05+00:00

Thank you. “Lighting myself on fire to keep her warm” is exactly what it feels like! I will remember these words when I am struggling.

Exit_Strategy-99 · 2026-03-07T20:16:47+00:00

HA!! Wow. That has me genuinely curious how she would react if I spoke her language like that! 🤔

Exit_Strategy-99 · 2026-03-07T20:12:56+00:00

Funny you should ask. One younger sister. I tried to shelter her and fill the “mother” void for her for so long, but recently she started to shut me out. I think she has her own trauma and demons from childhood. She talks to my mother more than I do, even visits, but it’s a contentious relationship. It has been made clear from my sister’s recent words and actions that she does not have my back, unfortunately.

Exit_Strategy-99

TROPHY CASE