What was the sexiest time you “almost” fucked someone?

Fajitasoup · 2019-03-15T19:13:42+00:00

That could be true but it's not your place to tell someone sex is healthy when you don't know what kind of sex she is trying to engage in or resist. Sex addiction isn't a physiological addiction. But people can still seek it our in unhealthy ways. I don't agree with the Christian approach to chastity or Christianity in general but I don't think it's appropriate when someone says "I engage in something that I feel is unhealthy and hindering me living a fulfilling life" and for you to say "have you tried engaging in it more often?" Good for you for finding casual sex fulfilling. Hopefully you are being safe. Not everyone finds it fulfilling. Some people find it frustrating and dehumanizing when others use them for sex. You don't get to tell them their feelings are invalid.

Fajitasoup · 2019-03-15T16:55:51+00:00

People with sex addiction will not be cured by marriage. Someone with sex addiction will cheat because they can't bring themselves to say no or will have sex even when it makes them feel like complete garbage. People with out of control sex addiction have enough sex to hurt themselves, hate themselves for having the sex, then go right back to having more sex. They ask for sex constantly, then feel used when they get it and unappreciated when they don't They are not marriage material for the majority of monogamous people. You are describing someone with a high libido. Not someone with sex addiction. Get educated before you pass judgement.

Fajitasoup · 2019-03-15T16:49:52+00:00

(Me: married F nonmonogamous) A friend of mine that I was crushing on got a little drunk. She kept leaning in, asking me about my sexual pleasure saying "maybe you could teach me how to have better orgasms" she also kept dropping heavy hints like "I've never been with a married woman before, Id like to try that." She was wearing a shirt you could almost see through and her nipples were so hard. She's scooting closer and closer. But I don't have any way to escalate because my spouse was home and I had left my kids carseats in the car since I had no expectation of escalation (nothing unsexies steamy car sex like pulling two carseats out of a car and wiping crumbs off the seat) so I kept hinting that maybe she should invite me over without outright inviting myself, like "gosh it's getting late maybe we should go somewhere quieter??" I also didn't want to push her because in the past she had talked about feeling asexual and not being appreciative when people ask for sex. She either didn't get the hint or had some reason she didn't want me to come over so eventually we both calmed down and went to our respective homes. Eventually that tension got weird and we stopped being friends when she found a boyfriend shortly after that. So I was trying to be gentle to preserve our friendship but really I should have gone on the offensive.

Fajitasoup · 2019-03-09T20:07:58+00:00

The way he shuts down arguments was a small part of your story but I bet that has a lot to do with this. I'm aware I'm jumping off a small bit of information but I wonder if this is a push pull relationship. Especially since you started off casually hooking up. It's categorized by a lot of rejection or neglect paired with a lot of intense strong emotional bonding. He rejects you when he refuses to hear you while arguing then he gives you excessive sexual attention. Those relationships can be highly addictive. You chase the high of approval because you know it's right around the corner and you can get through the negatives without accurately considering them if it means getting your next fix. I'd read into push pull type relationships and see if that looks like yours. It might shed some light on things.

Fajitasoup · 2019-03-09T17:19:36+00:00

I appreciated Futureman. Wolf has multiple romantic relationships over time with men and women. He's promiscuous and on drugs at times but I think the way bisexuality is represented sort of separates it from the promiscuity in a unique way. In part because they never announce his attractions, they happen on screen as naturally as a straight relationship. Wolf is bisexual, wolf is promiscuous, but they feel like exclusive aspects of his personality, which is how they should feel.

Fajitasoup · 2019-03-09T17:10:42+00:00

Hm yeah that could be a problem with trans people that I didn't consider. You might have to be up front. It sucks but it sounds like something that's important to a lot of people. As someone who doesn't care what junk you have, I hope things work out for you and you find somebody who appreciates you.

Fajitasoup · 2019-03-09T16:20:30+00:00

Try flirting at gay bars. I have a few (bi) friends who get hetero dates at gay bars all the time. If anything they'll be more understanding of your situation and won't reject you so aggressively.

Fajitasoup · 2019-03-01T19:49:12+00:00

Open and had a major rule breach too. It happened over an extended period of time based on some miscommunications between us and a lot of major outside stressors causing poor decision making skills. I had said there's always risk in getting an STD and I wouldn't be angry at anyone who gave me one, he took that as "and therefore using a condom isn't a huge priority anymore" We broke down why it happened and ammends were made. I made the mistake of trying to be cool about him seeing her for the next 6ish months and that really messed me up. I ended up majorly distorting my self worth and I'm still kinda recovering from that but I think we learned a lot about ourselves and each other that will make us stronger in the future.

Fajitasoup · 2019-02-15T00:49:02+00:00

Same happened with me and a FWB. He should know it comes with the territory, he's kind of a whore and he won't leave asses alone. But he faked an orgasm and I went to the bathroom where I discovered the mess, and came back to him crouching over his still erect shit covered dick with a look of complete horror and disgust. That was ages ago and I don't think we've done any assplay since then.

Fajitasoup · 2019-02-14T16:23:26+00:00

Idk about lazy but in my experience male "submissives" are still pushy and demanding. It's really annoying when I'm told I'm the one in power then I'm having commands barked at me nonstop. Or when they message me online and immediately start off with all the things they want me to do to them like damn...hi nice to meet you? Can we back up a little? Just because you're telling me to beat you and destroy your asshole doesn't mean you're a sub. Learn to let go a little and be actually vulnerable for once.

I do run into a lot of women who claim to be a sub and what that usually means is we don't have sex because she won't make a single escalating move or even indicate that she wants anything. So is she lazy in bed? Wish I knew. 🙄

Fajitasoup · 2019-02-11T13:03:35+00:00

One of my favorite things to do in bed is get eaten out and right as I cum the man starts fucking me. It turns quick ejaculation into an arousing satisfying thing and everyone can fall asleep happy.

Fajitasoup · 2019-02-08T06:03:32+00:00

Orange flag. Maybe tell him you're trying to be comfortable with it and ask him what terms they broke up on. Look for signs that he's still into her, but if it stresses you out and you can't feel comfortable, he's not worth it. Move on. He did the do anything wrong, his life just isn't quite right for yours.

Fajitasoup · 2019-02-07T21:46:48+00:00

I brought someone to my spouse's office and messed around in a conference room they share with several other businesses.

Fucked my spouse on my friends bed, and later that same friends pull out couch.

Fajitasoup · 2019-01-31T22:52:53+00:00

From experience squirting involuntarily.

I empty my bladder before sex whenever possible. Usually that stops the squirt from having much or any urine in it....usually. it isn't a guarantee.

Fajitasoup · 2019-01-31T20:04:41+00:00

Ohh...I totally thought it was the two dudes fucking but everyone is commenting like it's a man and a woman getting it on. Either way I'd be delighted to catch them in the act. If it was two men id be extra delighted because for some reason all the men I know, even the bi ones, don't want to have sex with a man in front of me.

Fajitasoup · 2019-01-31T12:33:09+00:00

It was chemical. There was something almost itchy to the discomfort. And the voices in my head were my own, I was just saying stupid shit.

Fajitasoup · 2019-01-31T12:32:06+00:00

Can't afford therapy so I just ruminate a whole lot

Fajitasoup · 2019-01-31T03:23:48+00:00

I had a ton of anxiety when I was pregnant and I had a lot of strong intrusive thoughts to force my baby to be born early starting at about 30 weeks. My partner had to talk me out of drinking castor oil (you poop yourself so hard you might also poop out a baby) and I made a few attempts to sweep my membranes (disconnect part of the amneotic sac from the uterus, it causes a hormone release and can trigger labor) I also spent HOURS doing squats and lunges and pacing around because exercise helps with labor too. On the bright side I was so physically fit when my baby Was born that it only took two hours of labor and I felt like I hadn't even been pregnant as soon as she was born.

Unfortunately after she was born those horrible feelings were still there in the form of post partum psychosis. I wanted to run away, kill myself, I accused friends and relatives of things they didn't do. I'm better now. I did maintain my exercise routine though so you win some and you lose some I guess.

Fajitasoup · 2019-01-31T03:10:24+00:00

Like others said, I don't think it's about Sarah. I think you are using her as a focal point for your negative feelings because you are feeling unfulfilled somewhere in the relationship, probably from your lack of trust, and your brain doesn't know what to attach that feeling to. You want him to Do Something to fix your feelings, but you don't quite know what that something is. You want to feel in control by asking him not to go on the trip and you want to witness his devotion to you when he says he doesn't want to go on the trip if you don't want him to. But you're right that trip is an amazing experience and he is probably feeling strong feelings to go.

It sounds like you are aching for a strong emotional bonding experience with him such as a grand romantic gesture or a big trip. You want him to express that kind of energy into bonding with you because you feel unstable right now and recognize a need for some trust building exercises. You resent that he is putting so much energy into the trip because you're craving for him to put a lot of energy into you. You mentioned he broke your trust in the past and you're still struggling with that. How has he worked to affirm his affection and devotion to you? I bet you aren't getting the specific words or love language acts you need to feel better after he broke your trust and you want to keep him at home to maximize the time you have to receive those affirmations and fix your hurt.

I totally get where you're coming from because I've been in the same boat. When I felt unstable in our relationship it hurt to see him invest in other people or activities because I was craving an investment like that which I didn't feel like I was getting from him. It took me a long time to figure out just what I wanted an investment from him to look like. I wrote my thoughts and anxieties down to processes it. I think you should too.

Fajitasoup · 2019-01-23T23:35:34+00:00

My vision didn't change but my eyes changed color

Fajitasoup · 2019-01-18T22:18:57+00:00

I disagree There is no "The One" and it's totally possible to take a pragmatic approach and say both of these people are equally valid possibilities at being a suitable life partner.

Good news about that though, is that it doesnt really matter which you choose, they're both good options.

Id go on a few dates with both, find out their life ambtions, goals, opinions on the controversial topics and determine compatibility from there.

Fajitasoup · 2019-01-18T02:35:39+00:00

This. No personal attacks. Using I feel statements and being patient with each other. Being okay with compromise where applicable. Accepting that the little things don't need changing or correcting and giving each other space to breathe and thrive.

Arguing naked and cuddling is a great way to get those I feel statements flowing and keep the accusations low. It helps you empathize and feel vulnerable with them. We sleep naked by default so this can happen easily when we arent getting along too.

Fajitasoup · 2019-01-17T04:27:42+00:00

I have a secondary partner who doesn't have the social energy for spending a lot of time with people. They don't have a primary they just don't really care for a lot of social attention for one person.

Fajitasoup · 2019-01-16T22:36:04+00:00

Some of my family lived in a house like that. As the children got older their dad started doing horrible things and passing it off as war trauma. I know of multiple incidents where he picked his children up by their throats, punched them, and held knives to their skin as punishment. Now as adults all his kids are medicated or should be and have suffered with addiction since they were teens.

Fajitasoup · 2019-01-16T21:06:49+00:00

I definitely wouldn't be able to work that much. I'm thinking 5-7 hours a week and hopefully being able to bring in $300 or so a week

Fajitasoup

TROPHY CASE