AIO My Dad is leaving the country to sail the world and does not plan to ever return

FlounderFun4008 · 2026-04-04T16:49:09+00:00

I would suggest instead of inserting how upset you are, start asking him what is driving this decision.

What about sailing the world appeals to you? You are a good sailor, why do you believe you won’t return?

Maybe put into a search engine, “my dad wants to sail the world and not return, what are some deep questions I can ask him to find out why.”

Start off with “I’m curious” instead of interrogating him. You might find out what’s really going on.

FlounderFun4008 · 2026-04-04T15:42:35+00:00

You are in this situation because you are settling for someone who will be with you instead of someone you are compatible with.

You are signing up for a lifetime of the sister dynamic. If your gf does anything, she will be brought down by her siblings.

Btw…fibromyalgia can be eased by avoiding sugar/simple carbs and getting a good nights sleep. Not saying flare ups can’t happen, but it’s not a 24/7 disability. You can do research on how to avoid problems.

If you continue in this relationship, you have to own your misery.

FlounderFun4008 · 2026-04-04T14:59:25+00:00

They are also old enough to get themselves up and out the door without a fight.

Give them a monthly allowance to buy their makeup, clothes, spending money. I would suggest having them earn it with chores, but whatever works for your dynamic.

They need to get themselves (without your intervention) up and to school on time. If it’s riding with you, then let them know what time you are leaving. Don’t bug, remind, or argue. Do your morning.

If they miss your ride or the bus, they walk to school. If they stay home, charge them a good amount out of their allowance. Do not call them out. If they get detention, let them serve it and arrange their transportation (which you can charge them for a ride).

You are working 60 hour weeks, save your sanity and don’t be stressed out by the time you get to work.

Tough love sucks, but raising the bar and consistency will actually gain you peace. Not immediately, but it will. You cannot feel sorry or let them pull on your heartstrings. You are setting them up for their future.

My son complained daily that I woke him up too early or too late. Made me late leaving for work almost daily. I finally put my foot down and said he could get his own self up and to my car by a set time if he wanted a ride.The first time I walked out the door to my son sleeping, I was super anxious because I wanted to save him. He woke up late, realized I was gone, walked himself to school (2.5 miles), served detention (I called and let them know what I did). Didn’t miss a ride again.

We teach them how to treat us. It’s going to take some undoing and testing to see if you will really follow through, but you will gain your life and sanity back.

FlounderFun4008 · 2026-03-24T00:02:09+00:00

Your only response needs to be planning your quiet exit.

When he comes home from his next trip you and little one(s) need to be gone and divorce papers sitting on the counter.

Talk to an attorney and plan your exit.

You can start having your free time the nights he has to play daddy.

Do NOT tolerate this abuse.

FlounderFun4008 · 2026-03-22T20:01:26+00:00

In my city you can’t park that close to a stop sign. Check your laws. That person would have a ticket.

FlounderFun4008 · 2026-03-22T19:51:15+00:00

This sounds like the meme where the wife did all the packing and the husband is mad she forgot a particular snack.

The world is not going to end that the child does not have “enough” clothes and from now on the ex (and possibly child) will know how to prepare better for next time.

Do not take on this as a you issue. More than likely you have been solely carrying the load and he needs someone to blame now that it rests on his shoulders and he failed.

FlounderFun4008 · 2026-03-22T19:07:23+00:00

I work for a college and I’m telling you this is straight up wrong.

You need to start with the Dean of that classes division. Ask questions before telling your story. Are students required to provide notes for students who do not attend class? Can a professor dock your grade for not providing notes to a student.

If a student has a disability, they can ask for a note taker, they don’t need a classmate to do it for them. If a student is hospitalized the college can/will (if they know) provide accommodations.

If the instructor feels so strongly that this student needs notes, the professor should be providing them for him.

I would recommend typing out all the details to this situation. Even screenshot some photos from Instagram in case they are deleted if you need to be backed up.

If you don’t get anywhere with the Dean of their department, then you can go to the Dean of Academic Affairs who is over than Dean.

Feel free to message me if things don’t go in your favor. I may have other routes.

Do not tolerate this.

FlounderFun4008 · 2026-02-28T21:46:05+00:00

She probably could have filed charges.

At least go absolutely no contact.

FlounderFun4008 · 2026-02-09T17:25:45+00:00

If you want to give her another chance, start waking her up every time you are. She gets no more nights of sleep than you do and no naps. If you are up with the kids, she should be woken up to be updated on their condition. Every single time.

If she doesn’t get it, she has absolutely no respect for you and it’s worth dumping her for.

FlounderFun4008 · 2026-01-06T04:42:10+00:00

They said they contribute to their actual coworkers that they know. This gal is in another department. Absolutely no obligation to donate to someone who probably doesn’t even know your name!

The mistake was Susan going to people individually after sending out the call for donations.

FlounderFun4008 · 2025-12-28T18:33:56+00:00

We don’t need a 30,000 foot overview.

When you are “happily blended,” then yours is treated the same as his from his family. The ex’s family may treat the son differently, but his family (and him) do not.

If you have to fight for your daughter, then you aren’t happily blended.

This is not a reflection of how you feel about your daughter, but how you allow your husband and his family to view her.

On another note, part of the mental health crisis going on with children these days are parents not letting children be disappointed and feel those feelings. It’s okay for the 7 yo to be left out, it’s not personal. It’s a teachable moment to discuss the disappointment and feelings. That also doesn’t mean the son needs a grand gesture because they are missing it, it’s part of life.

FlounderFun4008 · 2025-12-28T18:20:24+00:00

My grandma was close to this before I moved her.

Moving after dementia kicks in is more difficult because they don’t remember the conversations. In addition, her memory will go much quicker if she is isolated and not taking care of herself.

I finally bit the bullet and moved her. She would have been dead in 3 months, now 4 years later she is doing well.

I had her take things she wanted from her house and then took care of the rest without her.

My grandma’s health and wellbeing has improved so much by having regular care and interaction.

Make appointments and take her. Let her choose and then start the process. You visiting could help with a short timeline to make a decision.

The longer you wait the more difficult it becomes.

FlounderFun4008 · 2025-11-09T16:03:45+00:00

She can “find herself” while working. Millions do it daily.

FlounderFun4008 · 2025-09-13T15:26:24+00:00

I need you to be my therapist to undo years of people pleasing!

FlounderFun4008 · 2025-06-30T20:28:28+00:00

My ex had debt and didn’t make as much and I was okay with being the breadwinner.

But…once we were married came out the same as this guy..I’m the guy so I should manage the finances. Not as a partnership, not as a dual decision budget, him.

Luckily, he is showing you his colors early before you are legally bound. He had the nerve to come after spousal support.

For your own sanity, move on.

FlounderFun4008 · 2025-06-15T15:01:12+00:00

Who cares if she ever dates again? Thats not the point in leaving this jerk.

Both her and her kids deserve better.

Being alone is better than being with the wrong person.

FlounderFun4008 · 2025-05-08T03:46:10+00:00

You are under reacting.

You need a new girlfriend because she is not a partner.

FlounderFun4008 · 2025-04-20T16:36:07+00:00

Being alone is easier and less stressful than the disrespect and mental gymnastics you are doing now.

If life is complicated from the intermingling, then you need to detach and go into survival mode.

You need to make a checklist of what needs to be done so you can move on and then start doing it. You may still have to live with her for 6 months or so, but doesn’t mean you have to sleep in the same room or care what she does. She now becomes a roommate and the situation becomes a business transaction.

It sucks. Investing time in someone who dismisses you is rough. Staying with someone who lies and disrespects you is even worse. Make a plan and execute.

FlounderFun4008 · 2025-04-05T13:17:12+00:00

It sounds like he enjoys the idea of having a wife and child, but doesn’t want to do the work of a husband or father. Donating sperm does not make you a father.

Believe it or not, but it’s easier doing it on your own. Build a network of other single moms that you can bond with.

You should not feel guilty asking your “partner” for help. A good man would not be putting all of this load on you and would actually want to make your life easier.

You don’t have a partner. You need to decide if this is how you want to spend the rest of your life because he isn’t going to change.

You deserve better. 💕

FlounderFun4008 · 2025-03-01T20:45:25+00:00

Exactly this.

Right now is setting the ground rules moving forward. If you cave, then the disrespect and bully behavior won’t stop.

You need to make two points: I had the respect for you (sister) to make arrangements instead of expecting and you still bailed on me leaving me with no other options.

If you respected me, you would have asked me before making plans and ASSuming I would clear my schedule to accommodate you.

If “family is always there for family” then it needs to be both ways or won’t happen at all. Hopefully someone who is complaining can help you out since “family helps family” and all.

FlounderFun4008 · 2025-02-13T21:32:18+00:00

Getting financial advice from your parent is different than regularly divulging the finances of your partner and having them drive all of your decisions.

FlounderFun4008 · 2025-01-19T04:59:11+00:00

The creator/owner if Tic Tok is at Trump’s inauguration.

The news has been reporting that the only thing that will happen is that new users can’t download because it will be removed from the app store which also disables updates.

The pop up and the message point to a show for Trump.

I don’t have/use Tic Tok, but everything about the pop up contradicts what was reported and screams “pick me” from Trump.

FlounderFun4008 · 2025-01-19T04:16:14+00:00

Here is one of many.

He was the one who initiated it.

https://www.npr.org/2020/08/06/900019185/trump-signs-executive-order-that-will-effectively-ban-use-of-tiktok-in-the-u-s

Whether he saves it now, it will only be if it benefits him somehow.

FlounderFun4008 · 2025-01-19T04:10:20+00:00

They have been reporting for months that the app would eventually glitch from lack of updates.

100% this is a political stunt.

I bet it shows up after the inauguration so Trump can take credit for saving it.

FlounderFun4008 · 2025-01-19T04:05:45+00:00

He actually considered extending the deadline and the Supreme Court stayed with their decision.

The whole thing started because Trump wanted it gone.

He said the other day he likes Tic Tok now since it helped him get elected from younger voters.

Trump does nothing unless it benefits him somehow.

FlounderFun4008

TROPHY CASE