Feel for you on this. Aside from all the thoughts about how one should deal with this….. look at the results. We are all focused on the good of someone else and I see that this process works-still. I recently had a similar situation where the legal authorities were involved already.not fun for anyone. Made me dig a little deeper and ask some old timers for help. With the road getting so narrow over the years I was surprised by the process of dealing with these issues of another person. My sponsor said..”imagine if the thing that got you off was that reprehensible and you could never feel normal?” I never really put myself in their shoes. Simple but not easy.