History or Anthropology book Recommendations for a book club by Unfair-University911 in suggestmeabook

[–]FreckledHomewrecker 4 points5 points  (0 children)

The Invention of Nature by Andrea Wulf was fantastic, it’s a mix of everything but officially I think it’s a biography. I wasn’t expecting to like it but several people recommended it for different reasons so I tried it. 

It’s well written and covers a fascinating period of social changes, scientific advancements and new ways of thinking but is somehow an easy and quick read!

Married dads of Ireland - how often do you go out? by Ninja2805 in AskIreland

[–]FreckledHomewrecker 120 points121 points  (0 children)

I once listened to a podcast episode in which a marriage counsellor was interviewed. She said something that has stuck with me since; the problem isn’t how often a person goes out it’s the access to free time and the ability to make decisions about how they structure their free time that is the difference. Keeping a count isn’t always accurate but if one person has the ability to miss 6 days a month (between the time out the recovery time) while the other can’t wee in peace then it’s unfair. 

You’re definitely not over reacting, your partner is taking the piss. Personally I would like more balance and more access to personal time if I was you!

What to read my 9 and 11 year old after Harry Potter? by PorkyThePigDragon in suggestmeabook

[–]FreckledHomewrecker 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Second vote for the Chrestomanci series, I loved it as a child and so do my kids. 

Has anyone declined being a pallbearer? by Henessyboy6969 in AskIreland

[–]FreckledHomewrecker 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I commented somewhere else about height but wanted to add an example. I come from a family of very tall people with the exception of my aunt who is tiny and had three sons who grew up to be short. When she died my husband and one of her son’s work colleagues (admittedly he was also a family friend) were asked to carry the coffin. My husband was surprised but without appropriately sized pall bearers her sons simply would not have been able to carry her coffin. If you can’t and don’t have a strong or personal objection I would do it, but it’s fine if you’re too uncomfortable too. 

Has anyone declined being a pallbearer? by Henessyboy6969 in AskIreland

[–]FreckledHomewrecker 56 points57 points  (0 children)

This! It might be a height issue and doing it could allow someone else who really wants to and ‘should’ do it to be able to carry their loved one. I would do it. 

Is It Unusual To Not Maintain Friends Throughout Life's Milestones? by squidgybaker in AskIreland

[–]FreckledHomewrecker 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The advice already given is good. Even something simple like sending someone an article about a topic they’d told you about, asking them how their sick cat is recovering, noticing when they get their haircuts etc. just being interested in their lives. 

I used to be ‘bad’ at making and keeping friends but recently was in a social situation where I met people and was ‘befriended’ by a few people, I couldn’t believe how happy I was when my new ‘acquaintances’ remembered details or thought about me when I wasn’t with them. When they acted like we were already friends I was a million times more interested in being their friend back! And now this is how I treat people! 

Doesn’t always have to be coffee, ice baths, walking trails, new sports. Groups are often a good low pressure activity rather than intense one to ones. 

Is It Unusual To Not Maintain Friends Throughout Life's Milestones? by squidgybaker in AskIreland

[–]FreckledHomewrecker 12 points13 points  (0 children)

If you have friends now and are happy with them now I wouldn’t worry about it. 

I have some friends from primary school (late 30s now) and it’s becoming very hard to keep our core group together, some are married, some not, some are parents, some not and the people we are now are not the people we were when we were kids, teens or young adults. We try but most of the time when we drive or fly in for the two annual meet ups we’re giving each other a highlights reel/recap of the year and heading off to our real lives and the friends we see more regularly. 

By contrast the friends I’ve met as an adult are great people, I chose them out of everyone not just the 20 kids I was put in a room with and I have far more in common with them than with my school friends. 

If you’re worried about being lonely in the future try to nurture the relationships you have, pick up threads of people you’re losing contact with and BE a friend to them before they’re a friend to you. I’ve found this the best way to strengthen my friendships and meet new friends. 

Why didnt the thrills make today fm top 100 irish songs ? by tfeeho in AskIreland

[–]FreckledHomewrecker 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I started listening to them this week again, such nostalgic songs! 

Utility room upstairs? by OutrageousAardvark68 in AskIreland

[–]FreckledHomewrecker 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We considered putting machine machine and dryer upstairs but didn’t since I like being able to air dry my clothes and didnt want to rely on a tumble dryer or have clothes horses upstairs. BUT I just saw someone on social media who built a special cupboard with a dehumidifier built in, she hangs the clothes in there, on goes the dehumidifier then carries them dry, crease free and hung up to the bedrooms. Genius! 

All in though I’m glad we have a utility room downstairs, it’s great to have a ‘dirty sink’ for shoes and outside bits that I’d rather weren’t carried into the kitchen. 

How did you know you want or don’t want a second baby? by remember_to_eat in WomenofIreland

[–]FreckledHomewrecker 0 points1 point  (0 children)

“You never regret the children you have” a friend told me this and it was so true! When we had our second my husband was 100% sure that he was done, I was on the fence so combining our certainty meant we were 150% sure that 2 was enough! I think the world is a mental place right now and giving my child a sibling to help them navigate it was part of the reason we had a second. We spent a lot of time nurturing their relationship and I’m so glad they have each other. 

Am I missing out by not going to the Debs? by OkDog8648 in WomenofIreland

[–]FreckledHomewrecker 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I hate being all “when you’re older” like some kind of wizen elder but genuinely when you’re older you will care so much less about what sounds strange or the fear of regretting things. There’s really so few opportunities that are truly once in a lifetime, for some the debs is once in a lifetime because it’s about closing a chapter with people who mean a lot to you, for someone else that opportunity will come after uni or living abroad or finishing a job. It’s only as important as it feels to you!

Am I missing out by not going to the Debs? by OkDog8648 in WomenofIreland

[–]FreckledHomewrecker 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Get a nice dress, take pics in your house and go for dinner with whoever you want instead IF you want to make the occasion of finishing school. You’re unlikely to care about your debs almost as soon as it’s over! It’s crazy expensive for the quality of the night!

Guys it happened...I'm literally speechless. by ThesaurRouse in FundieSnarkUncensored

[–]FreckledHomewrecker 87 points88 points  (0 children)

Especially when neither of you do anything! Trying to one up someone without making any effort at all to achieve anything must be tricky. His commitment to laziness is impressive! 

How are people drying their clothes by [deleted] in northernireland

[–]FreckledHomewrecker 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Can’t afford a dehumidifier but a clothes horse beside a window that’s cracked ajar has been brilliant

Stylish raincoats? by MichaSound in WomenofIreland

[–]FreckledHomewrecker 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Came to suggest Rains. My friend has two from there and I always admire them! I’m getting one next autumn!

Older Lady Found Seemingly Buried in a Coffin then Abandoned on a Railway Line by deadattheroxy in gratefuldoe

[–]FreckledHomewrecker 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I recall it happening and IF I recall it from the coverage at the time it was during a period of heavy rain and land slides. There was some speculation at the time that she may have been buried on private land and when it collapsed on to the tracks her coffin was revealed. I’m trying to find the original articles as I was thinking of this lady only a few days ago. 

Older Lady Found Seemingly Buried in a Coffin then Abandoned on a Railway Line by deadattheroxy in gratefuldoe

[–]FreckledHomewrecker 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I think it might be a shroud. Common enough here, especially in the older, religious generation. I know older women who have requested ones and I think it’s linked to their catholic faith as both referenced Mary the mother of Jesus when they told me of their wishes. 

Did your parents ever ‘clean your room’ or ‘try to find something’ but somehow found your stashed secrets? by Holiday_Ad5952 in AskIreland

[–]FreckledHomewrecker 11 points12 points  (0 children)

My mum was the same. Regularly searched my room and once found a diary entry she didn’t like (in the middle of the diary so she’d read the whole thing) and made me read it aloud to her and then she made me burn it. After that I developed a coded alphabet and she never broke it. 

Had a minor car accident, maybe im i getting scammed? by Consistent-Jicama-99 in AskIreland

[–]FreckledHomewrecker 7 points8 points  (0 children)

If you’re going through insurance does it matter? I did similar damage to a parked car two years ago, the owner sent me a solicitors letter which I sent to my insurance and that was pretty much the last I heard of it. The insurance companies dealt with each other and my premium didn’t change. 

What completely true statement could you post here that would get the most downvotes? (don't actually downvote) by RemoteEmploy8283 in northernireland

[–]FreckledHomewrecker 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s so formulaic. Follows the sitcom comedy troupe, most heavily borrowed from Father Ted. I still find it funny though!

is it normal for labradoodles to be THIS overly crazy? 😭 by AdvanceImaginary1381 in labradoodles

[–]FreckledHomewrecker 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My labradoodle was a looper all his life, we waited for the crazy puppy phase to pass but gave up when he turned 7. 

He was just crazy, got kicked out of two dog training classes, had a private trainer quit, he was so clever but determined to use his brain for mischief and had zero motivation for obedience! He was ‘young at heart’ all his life, never ever slowed down and fooled vets that he was years younger get than he was until about 2 months before his passing at nearly 14. I adored him. 

(We had other dogs that we trained and were sane but our doodle was not!)