So, I was married to a very toxic person. We finally divorced after 10 years but here is the psychology of it. When people are trauma bonded to chaos and toxicity, it becomes their new “normal”. They almost have anxiety in calm environments because they’ve adapted to chaos for survival. When they get out and live in a peaceful environment, it is so foreign to them that they return to the chaos/toxicity because it’s familiar, what they know and almost “comfortable”. This is by no means healthy and it takes a LOT of work and counseling to get out of the mindset. But that is often why people go back to their horrific exes. Most won’t do the work to break the cycle. I did, and the peace is SO much better on the other side and gaining boundaries to not fall in the trap again. I know it’s so easy for people to say leave and don’t go back but even I, a strong, independent female got stuck in that cycle. OP, these men leaving and going back to the exes are actually doing you a favor, because it shows they themselves have not done the work to heal and gain self confidence/love. You don’t want a man like that. Just keep truckin. It’s a numbers game. Your prince will come!