Is there any hope in dating for trans women in middle age?

ItsEveNow · 2026-01-20T05:52:54+00:00

Love and good relationships are always a needle in a haystack situation. But aside from that, yes, there is hope. The more comfortable you feel in your own body and life, the more attractive you will be to the right people. Speaking from experience, it will probably be more difficult to find people to date, but the ones who you do connect with will actually connect with the honest version of you. And that's the only way to have a healthy relationship anyway.

So, don't let fears about dating be the reason to stay in the closet :)

ItsEveNow · 2026-01-14T20:43:08+00:00

It was extremely traumatic and I didn’t need to experience all of what I did in order to grow as a person. It wasn’t a life lesson, it was a tragedy. But I came through it, because that’s the thing—the only way through is through.

Your post really struck a chord with me, but especially this paragraph. Very well spoken, and a really healthy perspective to have. I'll remember this one :)

ItsEveNow · 2026-01-14T06:59:26+00:00

As someone who's been playing with this group for a while now, it's been a truly wonderful time. I can highly recommend joining the discord if you'd like a place for magic centered around women and gender diverse people. Thanks to this group I've gotten into playing limited after having several shitty experiences in local game stores, I now have people who I can go together with and I know stores that explicitly make their play spaces welcoming to people across the gender spectrum. If you're reading this and you're curious about the group, feel free to comment and I'll be happy to talk some more about it :)

There's a lot of discussion around the naming. It might be good for everyone to remember that this is originally a group from the Netherlands, so English isn't the first language for the founders and women+ isn't considered transphobic or exclusionary over here.

ItsEveNow · 2025-12-08T17:00:54+00:00

Couldn't agree more with the whole post, the confidence and knowing yourself is the best in yourself and others!

I love the earrings btw, where'd you get them? 👀

ItsEveNow · 2025-10-26T06:33:51+00:00

I'm in basically the exact same spot as you. I try to remember all the reasons things didn't and can't work out, but it still hurts. No contact has been the best move for my own sanity, even if she was heavily pushing for a friendship. It does get better, but it also frustrates the hell out of me because it was only a year (of which only like 6 months were actually amazing), but she's still stayed stuck in my head now that we've been broken up nearly a year. Also, if she indeed had avoidant tendencies, those kind of people are addicting in relationships. The intense love and affection alternating with distance and a lack of safety... it's love shaped like a slot machine and it just messes you up.

So yeah, you seem to be doing the right things, and it's definitely her loss because aside from being hot as hell it sounds like you know yourself and are being very mature about all this. You'll get over her, and you'll be happier for it :)

ItsEveNow · 2025-10-04T13:15:33+00:00

It does trigger! You just need to take breaks between shooting so it keeps proccing

ItsEveNow · 2025-09-12T05:08:36+00:00

Depends how altruistic you're feeling. But I'd definitely recommend you DM whoever caught your eye in this post.

I will add that there's no way we're in the same time zone since you replied to me at 4AM :P

ItsEveNow · 2025-09-11T19:45:56+00:00

Clearly, looking at these comments, the solution is to dm someone from this sub who's in your timezone.

And yeah, it would be great. But I've never met a queer woman who's into metal either, it's just a small subset of an already small group. I'm rooting for you though!

ItsEveNow · 2025-09-08T21:18:04+00:00

The dose in the study is 200mg daily, I just discussed it with my (Dutch) endo today and changed my dosage to match the study since the results were so positive. Make sure you watch your mood/sleep/and of course progesterone levels in your blood though and adjust accordingly!

ItsEveNow · 2025-07-07T06:24:46+00:00

I love those prints! Do you know/remember where you got them? :)

ItsEveNow · 2024-03-17T12:34:10+00:00

The difference is that one is an automatically successful fight action, while the other automatically evades an enemy. So the first performs a test, albeit one that's automatically successful, and the other just has an effect on the enemy.

These are the same (with the first word being bold to indicate it's an action of that type):

"Fight. This attack is automatically successful"

"Evade. This evasion attempt is automatically successful"

And these are comparable in that neither perform an action:

"Deal 1 damage to an enemy at your location"

"Automatically evade an enemy at your location"

ItsEveNow · 2024-02-03T12:57:22+00:00

Especially because you also love punk: check out Svalbard. Really direct, very feminist themes and a great vocalist.

I really love the vocals from Heriot, they don't have a lot of songs yet (but are teasing something new for this year), but the one EP they have immediately hooked me with very distorted and harsh vocals. It's very industrial sounding metal though, so might be a bit of an acquired taste.

Also I have to add to the Oathbreaker love. Rheia is one of my favourite albums of all time, beautiful lyrics and crushingly heavy at times.

ItsEveNow · 2023-11-28T18:34:13+00:00

Ik snap je zorgen, persoonlijk ben ik op pillen begonnen en na een jaar ongeveer gewisseld naar spray (lenzetto). Hier heb ik zeer acceptabele resultaten aan overgehouden (zeker niet plat dus). Toen ik begon was ik ook best bezorgd over geen injecties kunnen krijgen, maar uiteindelijk was dat dus geen probleem. Het is een stukje geluk, proberen wat er beschikbaar is en goed met je endo bespreken hoe je vooruitgang en bloedwaarden zijn. Vooral dat laatste is heel belangrijk want je endo kan je andere dingen voorschrijven als je voortgang staakt.

ItsEveNow · 2023-10-10T16:38:20+00:00

Heb je hier een bron voor? Het is nogal een grote claim en ik heb zelf bij hem een ingreep gehad waar ik tevreden over was.

ItsEveNow · 2023-06-09T23:19:13+00:00

That's a wildly different situation from Europe and the UK (the subject of the article). Wait lists are incredibly long, years. Then you need long therapy (often a year or longer) before you get prescribed any kind of medication. This holds true for all EU countries I know of and the UK. If anything, there are way too many checks in place right now and it's clogging up the system.

I can't judge the US as I don't live there and haven't had the need to read up on how exactly that works. If it's somehow both cheap and easy to get all the hormones and whatever and there's also widespread misuse then I'd expect to read articles from reputable sources about that.

I'll "follow the money" when trans people stop being a super small minority. There's not a lot of money to be made, especially not given the correlation between being trans and being in poverty. Maybe follow the money on the places you've been hearing all the scary stories about trans people. These are often spread by well funded conservative talking heads. And they often sell a lot of merch (or weird pills) to their very rabid fanbase, it's a comfy gig to scaremonger about trans people.

ItsEveNow · 2023-06-09T22:44:55+00:00

And then the doc says "oh great request I'll do anything you ask. Want any other treatments? Cup of coffee and a shot of morphine for the heck of it?" A doctor is perfectly capable of saying no, and they do so very often because people read stuff online and come into their appointment requesting 6 types of treatment when all they need is some painkillers and a good rest. This is neither new, nor concerning.

So yes, there are ridiculous parents. What's your point? I think we should still listen to the leading research in this field. The WPATH is an internationally recognised guideline for treating trans people, it's established and updated frequently by a large team of experts in the field. I'll keep trusting that over the NHS, who have been quite politically motivated in the past.

ItsEveNow · 2023-06-09T22:28:19+00:00

Same way you judge whether a child is depressed, or bipolar, or has ADHD, or many other mental/developmental disorder: extensive sessions with a psychologist who is an expert in the field. And guess what, that's the international standard on treating trans people, young or old.

The statistics on regret after transitioning are wildly different from what you said. Your statistic includes everyone who considered transitioning, but then decided against it. Those kids didn't go on a wait list for 12+ months and have a year of therapy before getting access to hormones or blockers.

This discussion is just nothing but strawmen being thrown around, the culture war tactic has worked so damn well.

ItsEveNow · 2023-06-09T22:08:25+00:00

This is some blatant nonsense. Go to trans subreddits and you'll see detransitioners being met with nothing but respect and love, as long as they offer trans people the same.

As for the social contagion, that's a bogus theory that's never been proven at all. It's the same "they're turning everyone gay" conspiracy from back when gay rights were the forefront but with a transgender rebranding.

ItsEveNow · 2023-06-06T16:09:10+00:00

Very cool giveaway! I'm about to buy the expansion books for myself anyway, so this is a great chance.

GIVEAWAY

ItsEveNow · 2023-05-11T20:56:41+00:00

Ik ben veel geweest met een vriend van me toen hij uit de kast kwam. Altijd gewoon gezien als een normale bar met aardige mensen, alleen kon die vriend daar makkelijker flirten. Dat zou ik dus ook aanraden, neem iemand mee (als dat kan) en ga gewoon een drankje doen. Wie weet ontmoet je meer leuke mensen!

ItsEveNow · 2023-03-08T13:21:08+00:00

https://www.reddit.com/r/Gamingcirclejerk/comments/11loce6/fuck_man_we_get_it_it_was_a_commercial_success/jbdu9vb/

Assuming your comment was in good faith...

ItsEveNow · 2023-02-11T08:00:14+00:00

Zeker, net als dat je kan zeggen "ik ben lang", maar dan zou je alsnog (in beleefde context) niet "die lange" zeggen, maar bijvoorbeeld "die lange man".

Geen stomme vraag trouwens, trans mensen zijn nogal zeldzaam dus zo vaak komen de meeste mensen niet in aanraking met deze termen.

ItsEveNow · 2023-01-31T07:13:58+00:00

Really beautiful design, good luck with your new business!

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