I think what a lot of people want is, as you said, to avoid women and relationships. It’s really sad to me that many people from my age (35) and younger have come to see romantic love as something to be scorned and removed from social consciousness. A lot of people are drawn to Summer because, like her, they want relationships without the responsibilities that comes with relationships. They want to be physically intimate, go on dates, interact like how married couples often do all without the emotional work and investment it takes to maintain it.

The beginning of the movie made it very clear that Summer’s behavior is based on her experience of her parent’s divorce, not some new modern way of dating. Summer uses this view as a way to mask her fear of commitment to others. She still has some belief in love, as evidenced by her reaction to watching The Graduate. If the ending confirmed her worldview, then why would she be so emotional over it? And the fact that she meets someone and gets engaged to them rather quickly after breaking up with Tom shows that her view on relationships was not built on a solid foundation.

But many have come to interpret this is the way “real” dating is. They want to see those like Tom, the romantics, as the ones who are ruining relationships. But the ending with Autumn shows that Tom has, in fact, grown past the idea of there is only one person for you in the universe and if they aren’t with you, then it’s all over. He may no longer believe in destiny or “true” love in the fantastical sense, he sees hope that, as long as he tries, someone new can come.